For a non-western person who lives in the western now, for me it is do you have a consent? Not did I give one as a woman? or ideally both.
In my own home country (let us not talk about it again), most women are raped by their husbands who clearly know they do not have a consent and do not care. In fact very rare to get raped by a stranger.
I probably said this before somewhere along this topic, but a man should really know he is allowed or is given a consent to "penetrate". This may be the base for when both are drunk who did what? but I could be wrong.
The way I look at it now from the western perspective is this: a woman is often responsible for birth control cause well it is obvious the cost is too high for her. By the same token, men need to become more responsible knowing if they have a consent cause again the cost of being accused for rape (conviction or not) is too high.
however, I know in our current culture, often we put all responsibility on the women...so that is unfortunate.
Ps. I really really love the idea of abstract sex talk before anything happens so everybody knows in abstract what we are into (as @joeylittle ) notes above. But again that is the funny part, people want to f*ck not talk!
In my own home country (let us not talk about it again), most women are raped by their husbands who clearly know they do not have a consent and do not care. In fact very rare to get raped by a stranger.
I probably said this before somewhere along this topic, but a man should really know he is allowed or is given a consent to "penetrate". This may be the base for when both are drunk who did what? but I could be wrong.
The way I look at it now from the western perspective is this: a woman is often responsible for birth control cause well it is obvious the cost is too high for her. By the same token, men need to become more responsible knowing if they have a consent cause again the cost of being accused for rape (conviction or not) is too high.
however, I know in our current culture, often we put all responsibility on the women...so that is unfortunate.
Ps. I really really love the idea of abstract sex talk before anything happens so everybody knows in abstract what we are into (as @joeylittle ) notes above. But again that is the funny part, people want to f*ck not talk!