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Triggered so much today from work!!!!

The_One

Learning
I have been okay. On medications and doing therapy. Working away full time remote. Has been nice , even though I have not been paid the way I want to be paid (16 Hr for my job title isn’t great) I’m content.
My company is having a merger and I didn’t think twice about it until I noticed one of my ex roommates who’s also employed with the company is gone. She’s in another dept. I tried looking her up on teams and noticed she was gone! So I texted her and she said she was laid off a couple weeks ago. No one has mentioned any lay offs to anyone. Like I was surprised to hear this info!!

I’ve been laid off before during the pandemic. The fact that unemployment had the Covid payment on top of it really helped.

Now I’m hearing about lay offs from this merger my company has merged with. I didn’t know there were any until today when I texted my friend! I then went on the internet and put my company’s name and layoffs and sure enough there’s a forum that’s completely anon where they’re talking about the pending layoffs.
I’m getting so triggered by this. I’ve had some traumatic experiences from my work places which in the past two years I’ve managed to overcome somewhat.

But now I’m being triggered again. I’ve only been at the company 8 months and im still new. I could be on the chopping block. Im starting to look for new jobs this weekend. I wanted to stay at this job for atleast a year before trying to find something else….
I feel hopeless I feel drained I feel saddened. I feel like I shouldnt worry Too much because it might affect my performance but im a worrier. Idk what worrying can do but I feel like the only thing I can do right now is worry.

I feel so helpless. Im not able to get my career off the ground. This is so frustrating to me
I need to sleep but can’t. I’m thinking about this!
 
but I feel like the only thing I can do right now is worry.
I don’t know if your trauma history is directly tied to being laid off (trigger) or indirectly (stressor) Stressor vs. Trigger - What Is A Trigger? or if your stress cup is maxing out (or all 3!)… but the good news is that there are definitely some things you can do 🤠

1. You’ve already started both the process of looking for new work AND being self aware enough to begin to monitor & manage both stress & symptoms. Those are great things.

2. If your stress cup is rising, so you’re getting increasingly symptomatic? Time to double down on stress management, to handle the increased load.

3. If your trauma history directly/indirectly ties to your employment, don’t expect to completely sever all connections in whatever time you have (laid off or not), but you CAN begin to work on those triggers & stressors. There are links in the above article on triggers & stressors, and you can find more on working with triggers & stressors in various ways on the article page.

1 + 2 + 3 = You’re not helpless, and it’s not hopeless. 😎 There are very solid steps you can take, and are already taking.
 
The worry is real.
but the fact you’re going to be laid off isn’t. you’ve made it a fact when it might not be one.

can you ask? Sit down with someone or have it in writing?
I can ask my boss on Monday but I’m not sure they can put it down in writing, I’m not even sure how to ask her what exactly is going on with the company.

I asked my team leads a couple weeks ago and they said they haven’t heard anything and they’re basically in the dark. My company isn’t making the layoffs a known thing. They’re keeping it hush hush. Which sucks. I didn’t know about this until today.
Idk if the forum I got the info from is even legit on the layoff dates because the forum has all anonymous people posting.
We’re supposed to be getting transition letters March 6-10th and the next layoff is March 9th.

I don’t know if your trauma history is directly tied to being laid off (trigger) or indirectly (stressor) Stressor vs. Trigger - What Is A Trigger? or if your stress cup is maxing out (or all 3!)… but the good news is that there are definitely some things you can do 🤠

1. You’ve already started both the process of looking for new work AND being self aware enough to begin to monitor & manage both stress & symptoms. Those are great things.

2. If your stress cup is rising, so you’re getting increasingly symptomatic? Time to double down on stress management, to handle the increased load.

3. If your trauma history directly/indirectly ties to your employment, don’t expect to completely sever all connections in whatever time you have (laid off or not), but you CAN begin to work on those triggers & stressors. There are links in the above article on triggers & stressors, and you can find more on working with triggers & stressors in various ways on the article page.

1 + 2 + 3 = You’re not helpless, and it’s not hopeless. 😎 There are very solid steps you can take, and are already taking.
It’s all three and yes I will be taking all three of these. :)
 
I'm sorry that happened..

But......you have a job, which is a safe base from which to make a decision: stay in this job or look for a new one.

The positives are: they kept you on. You have an income.

Change is always really hard..and these things are outside of your control..
 
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