Sexual Assault PTSD triggered after a dream

[Patricia]

Hi, it's the middle of the night here and after a little sleep I had a dream about my wife that strangely triggered my PTSD. My wife has been murdered last year and I myself have to face a rape and a stabbing.
It was a nice dream, I was cuddling with my wife, feeling her presence near me. I suddenly woke up and began crying and feeling anxious. I had reminiscences of the rape and despite the heat I covered myself with a blanket, staring at my wedding ring. It's starting to get better but it was some time that the rape didn't cross my mind.
I had to change my pajamas for pants and it was like after the incident. Flashbacks.
I took a pill for my anxiety.
It was such a nice dream and I woke up traumatized again and alone not knowing how to react. No more flashbacks but I think I m in shock, no more emotion, staring at nothing.
Is it normal when you have PTSD to be triggered just like that?

 

[Movingforward10]

Very normal.

You are dealing with so much and it hasn't been long since your wife was murdered.

It's totally understandable that having a lovely dream about your wife, only to wake up to the emotional pain of the reality can trigger the feelings of rape/trauma/grief.

Do you have a therapist?

 

[Patricia]

Hi, thanks for answering me.
What you say makes sense and it's reassuring. I don't understand how I sometimes react. And reality hits hard these days.
I don't have a therapist yet, I'm looking for one. It's scary to me because there's so many things I don't feel ready to face.

 

[Movingforward10]

Our reactions to trauma can be very confusing. And that can all be very unsettling. And it can be a vicious cycle.

It helped me to have a therapist. I was very scared about starting therapy that everything would come crashing down.
Sometimes it talking about that fear, rather than the trauma itself, that can help to provide stability before going to the really painful parts.

 

[Patricia]

Our reactions to trauma can be very confusing. And that can all be very unsettling. And it can be a vicious cycle.

Yeah they sometimes are! What do you mean by 'it can be a vicious cycle'?
I feel that I sometimes need to willingly make the effort to keep my head above water because I would risk drowning in my pain, consciously or not. Is that what you mean?

You are brave to work with a therapist.