Vain Resilience?

[ronin47]

As I struggle away at college and battle financial woes, I sometimes wonder, where does one draw the line between resilience as a positive thing and beating a dead horse? I keep trying, coming back each semester, try to get as many hours of work in as I can, apply for all sorts of scholarships and programs, but am I really just ignoring the obvious? Do I need to be more realistic with myself and not keep vying for goals that the completely objective observor would say are out of my reach?

Take graduate school for instance. I currently have a 2.4 gpa and my professor told the class one day flat out, "If you don't have at least a 3.0 gpa you're not getting into grad school." And he's right, most programs that I would want to try do have a minimum 3.0 gpa requirement. I have two choices really. I can either be realistic and give up on that goal altogether, or I can take a chunk of extra classes for the soul purpose of getting my cumulative gpa up with no gaurantee that that's what would actually end up happening and drive myself and my mother further into debt.

Or traveling. I have always had dreams of traveling about the world, and I have been to Guatemala and Peru (and Canada, but that doesn't really count). However, I want to travel more, and go to the Eastern Hemisphere. That's a very expensive aspiration though. Neither my mother nor I have such money, and my grades, realistically, are not high enough to qualify for any sort of study abroad scholarships.

Why then do I keep making these plans that inevitably fall through and keep dissapointing myself?

Yeesh. Sorry for the philosophical ramble. Thoughts anyone?

 

[allitherapy]

Maybe take some time to figure out why your grades are struggling and what steps you can take to improve them. If you can, take some extra classes to boost your GPA. This is of course, if your goal is truly to get into grad school. If you really want to do it, you can make it happen. It might be a hard road, but you can do it! Grad schools usually have a minimum requirement for GPA, but if you talk to an admissions counselor, a lot of times they do make exceptions for extenuating circumstances. They might want it a little higher than a 2.4 , but it may not actually have to be a 3.0. This depends what you want to go to grad school for. Send me a PM if you want to talk specifics; I have some inside knowledge about how the grad school admissions process goes.

 

[Reclusive]

Also, talk to your teachers and see what you can do - maybe an extra paper or two for extra credit to bring up that GPA without adding more classes to your class load. And if you DO decide to ditch it and travel, a lot of my friends have taught English abroad with nothing more than an associates degree (if that), so that's one way to travel.

 

[TLight]

Get a two year degree in something that is not too stress, i.e. radiology tech.
I went for nearly 9 years, have more than two degrees, tried to run the world and I'm broke and can't do any of it.....environmental consulting and policy.
Really think about what you are pursuing and whether or not you can do it with PTSD. Think about what will fit with this disorder, cause it ain't going away and you can end up hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt, old, and unable to do what you were considering.

Take it easy on yourself.
From someone who's been there (and back) 46 years old......can't do a career, can't get a 'simple job' have to live on disabability all simply cause I was in deep denial of this condition.

 

[ronin47]

If you really want to do it, you can make it happen.

Thank you for your support. You see, the thing is, I really want to go to Africa this summer, but unless I can magically conjure up $5000 dollars out of nowhere, it's not going to happen. Where does one draw the line?

 

[Reclusive]

This is gonna sound all new age-y, but I think you'll find a way when you're ready to.

 

[ronin47]

This is gonna sound all new age-y, but I think you'll find a way when you're ready to.

Hm. Not sure I totally follow what you're getting at, but thank you for the response. Is it like one of those "meant to be" things?

 

[Babablacksheep]

One step at a time, dear. One day at a time. Just focus on today. Not everything always turns out the way we plan. It's okay to have goals, but realize no one is perfect, we all make mistakes. We all go through hard times.

 

[Reclusive]

Hm. Not sure I totally follow what you're getting at, but thank you for the response. Is it like one of those "meant to be" things?

No, it's more like when you're ready to go to Africa, you'll be in a place where you can make plans to make it happen. I'm sorry I didn't totally make sense. But when you're ready to start planning, hop on here and I bet we can think of all sorts of ways for you to save/make money.