Breaking Negative Loop

[Tanishq]

I have found out I also have this mental thought which goes like a loop.

"I don't go out because I don't feel well. I don't feel well because I don't go out." And it's a never ending loop.

My mind gets confused much when I arrive at this point and I can't think of other things. I want to come out of this.

Your thoughts and support please.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

Jaret I will share this quote with you. Insanity is doing the same thing over and over expecting different results. I think you will have to take baby steps to break the loop. Do what you can when you feel safe and comfortable. Go from a position of strength not a position of weakness. Hope this helps.

 

[Red Feather]

I liked that Gizmo. :)

 

[Tanishq]

Thank you gizmo. It is right, when we are safe and comfortable we have much strength and it also matters what position we choose. :)

 

[Loloma]

Understand where you're coming from Jaret. I do the same thing, tend to stay in when I can go out. I keep myself busy with other peoples lives. For example, I look after my son and grandchildren, work in my son's office, do the housework etc.

By the time I'm finished, I'm too exhasted to do anything else. Am I using this as a crutch so that I don't have to go further with my own life.

The point is I know I'm doing it, but can't stop myself. I plan to find my own place to live in a month or two so I don't have excuses to live my own life. I know I'm not much help to you, as I don't know how to find new friends or contacts.

Maybe others on the forum can give us some ideas, on how to go about it. Have to bear in mind that I am not so young anymore and you probably are.

Wish you all the best (((((hugs))))).

 

[Tanishq]

I know I'm not much help to you, as I don't know how to find new friends or contacts.

Maybe others on the forum can give us some ideas, on how to go about it. Have to bear in mind that I am not so young anymore and you probably are.

Wish you all the best (((((hugs))))).

Loloma, I think you're wrong. You have encourage me to keep looking for answers. :)

Side note: I don't know what you meant by not so young anymore, You are much valuable. You have seen much more life then me, you have more lessons then me. Please, keep supporting and sharing with me?

 

[99Phoenix99]

Well that's my never ending loop lol

Although recently Jaret I've been telling myself "You're not going to feel well if you stay home. But there's an off chance you'll feel better when you get out." And I've found that 6 out of 10 times I do feel better when I go out. And even if I don't feel better physically, mentally I take a little pride in pushing myself to go out regardless.

Then again there are some days where I physically can't go out even if I wanted to, dizziness and that whole sha-bang.

It's... a fine line :/

 

[Tanishq]

Well that's my never ending loop lol

And I've found that 6 out of 10 times I do feel better when I go out. And even if I don't feel better physically, mentally I take a little pride in pushing myself to go out regardless.

lol I do take this all funny. :laugh:

Phoenix, It has worked for me. I don't push myself since I have lots of bad feelings with push. Yes, I do feel great when I am walking at park and giving the exercise body asks.

We will come out from this. We will never give up and one day it will be broken. :)

 

[99Phoenix99]

Too right Jaret! I'm glad it's been helping both of us.

We will make this better! Just... in baby steps :P

 

[Traumagirl]

I pretty much don't feel well at all. It seems impossible to find that fine line where I can push a little without sending me into a panic. That's what happens when I push too much, my anxiety goes through the roof. My body feels better when I rest, but if I rest too much, it feels worse. It's very frustrating. I even ask my doctor if I should rest more or do more. They don't know either.

 

[JustBe]

My Tdoc said that with PTSD, feeling anxious is the default. She said with practice I can lower the level of anxiety to manageable levels. If that helps anyone...;)

 

[maddog]

Getting the whole activity/stimulation balance right is really really tricky. Too much spirals me into anxiety and complete not coping stress, whereas too little sends me into super depressed stagnated mode, not to mention heightens my sensitivity to normal stress next time round when I try to increase my activity levels, etc.

My T has a very simple (almost oddly so) rule of thumb that has somehow come to be very meaningful to me. He simply says "just do a bit". In my case, it's about engaging, getting out there, doing things, but without the pressure of expectation or the need to achieve big things. It's going out for a coffee with a friend, for just a little while. It's going for a walk, but just a short one. It's ringing a friend regularly, but for short conversations. It's doing the housework, one chore per day.

Many of the tasks that seem so huge and daunting can often be minimised if we don't set huge expectations and look on them as opportunities to keep moving and engaged, rather than mountains we have to climb.

Everyone's threshhold is different, and we never get it right *all* of the time. But by doing "just a bit", I find I maximise my chances to actually get a lot done.

Maddog