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Hello... PTSD From Police Duty

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randr320

New Here
Hi to all,

I'm new to the forum.....guess I should start with the orgin of why I'm suddenly here.....I'm a cop. I and my family came out of an isolated community(two hundered miles from the nearest road) in the far north after two years of policing up there. During those years I physically fought with people each day and was involved with numerous firearms related incidents culminiating with a shooting where the person I was attempting to help ended up blowing his face off in front of me.....(sorry if this is too graphic..:dont-know:) I've been prescribed with various meds to help but none seem to be working (this over a period of approx. 2 years) My doc has just put me on another med. which led to me spending the last four days in bed, unable to get up or interact with my family......I'm considering quitting the meds altogether and weaning myself off in an attempt to tackle PTSD head-on....:boxem: Maybe go the natural route and try and find something there.....It feels like I've lost years from my life here.........I think the treatment is doing more harm at this point than good........sorry to blather on....I'm looking forward to talk to some people here and maybe sharing some ways to help each other out......:smile:
 
welcome! I am so very sorry for what you went through and hope you find the info you seek. There is lots of support here! I must say though.. Thank You for doing the job you did! If it wasn't for people like you out there protecting us on a day to day basis.. life would be so much worse then it is. I don't think people let officers and others .. firefighters and emergency people know often enough how much they are needed and apreciated!
 
Welcome to the forum........I promise not to speed while online, if you promise not to give me any tickets......LOL!!!!

Hang in there, things will get easier in time. Read about PTSD, and work hard to recover.

I used to talk to another cop, on a different PTSD board, she said that PTSD was NOT accepted as a diagnosis in her line of work. There was a lot of crap that you went through, so she chose to hide hers. She was on the verge of leaving her job, the last time I talked to her because she couldn't keep things a secret any longer. Is this true for your dept. too?????

Wendy
 
Welcome to the forum........I promise not to speed while online, if you promise not to give me any tickets......LOL!!!!

Hang in there, things will get easier in time. Read about PTSD, and work hard to recover.

I used to talk to another cop, on a different PTSD board, she said that PTSD was NOT accepted as a diagnosis in her line of work. There was a lot of crap that you went through, so she chose to hide hers. She was on the verge of leaving her job, the last time I talked to her because she couldn't keep things a secret any longer. Is this true for your dept. too?????

Wendy

Yeah......unfortunately its true......the worst of it is that as a cop you feel most comfortable with others who share the same experiences as you...others who are "on the job" so to speak.......then you get diagnosed with something like PTSD and they put you off work.....taking you away from those who you are most comfortable around.....kind of a catch-22

I've been considering leaving the force because of the PTSD.....the meds are screwing me up badly and the aggression issues aren't acceptable in this line of work....only problem is "What does a cop with 15 years service do?"....I can't really imagine doing anything else and I know I used to be a good cop.....I've got the record to prove it....I just can't seem to find my way back. Right now I'm on a forced leave as the doc feels I'm putting myself into dangerous situtations on purpose.....I don't know about that, but I do want to use this forced leave to get a better handle on this, and be a better husband and father........as for the speeding tickets......I won't tell if you don't.....:wink:
 
Randr,

Sorry to hear that it's true in your place too. Kay kind of told me that it was like that everywhere. Just so unfair. Is it a (sorry) macho thing??? I just don't understand. I mean....It's not like you guys don't see or interact with violence. Your not immune to it either. So why would they think that it couldn't effect you after a time????

Anyway, PTSD can be controlled. It's a lot of work, and a lot of trial and error to find out what works for you. Learning your triggers, and finding a way to help you through them will be a big help. I also think that once you understand all about PTSD....That your anger may subside too. Right now I think that you are feeling overwhelmed, and frustrated, thus the anger and rage.

Calm down and take a deep breath. We all understand what you are going through and there is a wealth of information here to help you. Along with tons of people too.


PS... You STILL are a good cop, you just need some time......
Wendy
 
Hey Cat,

I think its not so much "macho" but more of an "A type" personality thing......we all strive to be the top dog and when someone falls down it brings home the reality that it could happen to you as well.....thinking back, I believe thats more of how I feltwhen it happened to other guys......we can handle divorces, death, horrible motor vehicle incidents, but when another cop falls down (I call it falling down.....I'm not sure why:dont-know) or when children are involved, most of us react.........we cover a lot of stuff up with "black humor" but we can't do that with another cop or a child......besides we're supposed to be worth three normal men right?!.....:crazy:

Its not even really the violence as such....for me the shooting acts as a trigger but the act of the individual himself in attempting to take his life in a paticularly gruesome manner doesn't really bother me that much.......I've certainly seen worse in Motor vehicle accidents and sexual assults....but in my instance I can't stop being a cop 24 hours a day........the files I am working on are consuming me and I can no longer differentiate the "me" at home and the "me" at work. I'm in survival mode 24 hours a day and my aggression responses are way out of line to some of the situtations I'm dealing with.

This sites been a wealth of info so far.....the anger management has been helpful and my wife has been looking at some of the posts made by other spouses...we're looking forward to using this site together and finding a way out of this mess.....
 
Welcome to the forum, Randr. There is plenty of support and help here. Downside is if you are still in that line of work I would be at a loss on how you would heal if you are still being exposed to what put you here. Not many soldiers heal in the midst of war. But we do all we can to be here as a support group.
 
Welcome Randr, I to work in the Emergency Services and totally understand the most confortable around others who do the same line of work I too was pulled off work for similar reasons but am back doing what I love now again, Like you I had no idea what I could do as I have been in EMS all my life and I understand your statement what does one do when all you know is a certain line of work. I wish you the best this is a great place to vent, to learn, to move forward with a no nonsense attitude good luck on your Journey-- Mouse
 
Hi randr, welcome to the forum. Know what you mean about banding together, those you often endure things with. It works the same in the military, apart from us who get PTSD vs. those who don't, we became nut cases to them. I had the same thing, shining record and was always promoted quickly, way ahead of what was considered normal promotion, though it all fell down around my ears when I discovered I had PTSD.

Its been a few years since then, though certainly doing much better nowadays than then. There is hope on the horizon for a vastly improved life.
 
Welcome to the forum.

There's a lot of information here that can answer questions you didn't even know you had. And a lot of folks who can offer support and acceptance. This is a good place to find the tools you need to help yourself heal.

Lisa
 
Hey mate,Ive been in cicumstances involving threats against me with firearms from my father but that was just two incidents,it scared the hell out of me.I don't know how you guys live with that threat day in day out.As far as natural ways of dealing with PTSD I've found in thew past that exercise,walking gym or what-ever you can handle,just 10-20 mins a day of meditation to quiet the mind a bit and a half way desent diet go along way to helping.As well as natural things like valeriun root etc and the opportunity to talk things out with a professional.I was on a big regime of medications and managed to come off them with these techniques.Hope it helps.socrates70
 
I was a loss prevention officer in canada and I got hurt making an arrest the suspect bite me and picked me with a dirty needle. He then screamed that I was going to die as he has aids the police officer confirmed that the suspect did indeed have aids and hepc. My company totally abandoned me they waited until dec 23 to termiate me for being unable to do my job. I now feel completely alone because with my injury and job I now have no friends left.
 
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