Drinking And Flashbacks

[Jane.l]

I have been finding lately that my flashbacks are really bad when I have too much to drink . Which happens a lot I use alcohol whenever I am not coping well ( most of the time then !)

This week twice I have drunk so much that I can remember almost nothing of the evening before . Except for the awful flashback.

I know I need to cut back or stop drinking but I just seem to be unable to as things are so stressful just now. Do I wait a little? I am a few weeks away from moving house (currently living with my husband who I am separated from) or do I really need to tackle this now ?

Advice needed my brain is to muddled to think straight.

 

[franciemarnie]

I read of a study of how high cortisol levels when exacerbated by alcohol (which increase stress hormone chemistry) equals black outs.

Although when you're stressed, it can be most appealing to find chemical oblivion - it's a recipe for disaster. I know this from personal experience.

I stopped drinking ages ago due to blackouts and what happened during them - talk about terror!, so of course I just switched to a different drug. That didn't go so well either.

It can be hard to get off and stay off drugs - liquid or otherwise - because we usually don't have any coping mechanisms to reduce the stress or give us a sense of well being or we wouldn't be resorting to alcohol and meds to begin with, but there are better solutions. They aren't as quick in providing relief at first, but they last way longer and you haven't destroyed your body and mind, or anyone else's.

When you are ready to stop drinking you will. But black outs are terrifying, especially when you learn what you did under the influence. When common sense won't dictate, fear is a good motivator.

 

[Meadowsweet]

I drink too much when I'm stressed or emotional. But there are sometimes, when I feel too close to tipping over the edge, that I become afraid to drink. That has come from having flashbacks when I've drunk.

I think for me, the fear of the flashback has become stronger than the urge to drink. But maybe, when you're feeling very on the edge, it could work to remind yourself that drinking might bring on a flashback.

 

[Footie freak]

In the early days of my trauma, I used alcohol as a coping tool, particularly at night as I was afraid to close my eyes and sleep for fear of having a nightmare - the trouble is, I got to dependant on it..... And then the need for more or stronger alcohol to help sleep etc was there - it was a vicious circle, fortunately my partner could see what I was doing and literally put a stop to it - no alcohol in the house and as I had completely shut myself away from the outside world I wouldn't go and buy any.

Alcohol is not the answer. The odd glass here and there, perhaps with a meal socially, but don't allow yourself to carry on as you are, otherwise it may be too late before you realise what it is doing to you mentally...... It certainly won't help you recover from the trauma and flashbacks you are experiencing - and I can say that from personal experience. Good luck

 

[Jane.l]

Thanks for your replies they all make alot of sense.

The blackouts are worrying particularly as I am in a situation where I really need to keep my wits about me.Drinking also not only makes the flashbacks worse but I am less able to cope with them.

I also use drink to get me to sleep after a few nights of nightmares it's the only way I can get myself to sleep .I know there must be a better way to handle things but I feel it's a bit out of control .

 

[Footie freak]

I would recommend a visit to your GP about the blackouts, as that really is not normal - and also discuss the sleeping issues.... I did and was given mild sleeping tablets to help me relax.

I can sympathise with you about the flashbacks and drinking - that's how it affected me too, but seriously cutting down or stopping the alcohol intake will make it better for you, and you will be in a much better place to deal with the flashbacks if they happen - try therapy to help with the flashbacks as the therapist can help you with coping mechanisms. I also find that playing relaxation music helps me to drift off to sleep. There are so many other options out there to help with sleep, not just alcohol.

 

[Jane.l]

Thanks I have thought it might be an idea to speak to a GP about the drink but I don't want to speak to him about my Ptsd.

I am in therapy currently doing some really tough stuff to try and help with flashbacks and nightmares. There's just so much tough stuff to deal with at the moment . That's why I am a bit scared to stop drinking even though I really need to - I also don't want anything else to give myself a hard time over.

I am also worried that in a few weeks I will often be spending a lot of time on my own when my kids are with their dad and if I am still in this headspace the alcohol could really take over.

 

[Footie freak]

You obviously don't have to mention the PTSD to the GP, but it might be useful to discuss it, he is there to help you in the best way that he can, not to judge you etc..I'm glad you are in therapy, it is never easy and sometimes it gets worse and harder before it can get better, you just got to hang on in there and be strong..... Having time alone, could be a good thing, give yourself "me time" and do things you would not be able to do with the children around.... Excessive alcohol should be part of it though..

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Does your therapist deal with dual diagnosis patients such as yourself? As in, is she trained in it? I'm concerned that she doesn't/isn't. Just something to think about.

 

[Hashi]

I know I need to cut back or stop drinking but I just seem to be unable to as things are so stressful just now. Do I wait a little? I am a few weeks away from moving house (currently living with my husband who I am separated from) or do I really need to tackle this now ?

As someone with a history of coping with alcohol, there have been times when I knew the alcohol would cause more problems but I wasn't recovered enough to "go it alone" through a particularly horrible time.

Personally, it helped me to get some short term medication (diazepam or beta blockers) from my GP to see me through without drinking. I don't know if that's appropriate for you and I don't know how you feel about that. I'm really careful with medication and an extra benefit is that I wouldn't dare drink when taking it, however strong the urges. It worked/works for me but I recognise that might not be the answer for you.

 

[digger]

I think it's really hard to give up coping strategies, however negative they are, when you have not yet learnt new ones which effectively replace them.

I don't use alcohol any more, I do seem to have trained my brain now into accepting that that one leads to crashing, but it took a long time and I don't think I'd be confident enough to say that I never would again. I do still fall back on other negative coping strategies at times though.

I think taking it slow and steady while actively seeking out and learning and practising more positive strategies is the way forward, so that over time your mind turns to those first and by default, rather than the more negative ones.

I think if you are able to remind yourself of the more negative effects of your actions and reminding yourself that you are making a decision to use that is helpful. It's like having to retrain your mind into seeing the negative outcomes of it before the positives if that makes sense.

So perhaps labelling any alcohol you have in the house with the word FLASHBACK, might just give your brain the kick it needs to remind you to look for another solution first before turning to that. And having alist of other things you can try on hand as well to help.

 

[Jane.l]

To be honest solara it isn't something I have talked about with my T. I know he has worked alot in hospitals in and out patients and seems to have alot of experience with sexual abuse and ptsd. It's taken me ages to build up trust with him and he puts alot of time and thought into helping me - wouldn't be able to talk to anyone else about it.

Thanks for your ideas Hashi I do try to avoid meds where possible but maybe it's worth looking at. It does worry me though that I would just end up doing both as I get a bit of a death wish thing going on sometimes .

@digger - my T and I have looked at healthy coping strategies and it all makes perfect sense and sounds easy until I am freaking out or stressed to the max and then I end up going back to the negative ones .
But I am sure you are right it's a matter of linking negative outcomes to the negative strategies.

Wish I could just run away or disappear - tired and low today