Can You Treat Your Ptsd Yourself? Or Do You Need Therapy?

[J_trustno1]

I've had therapy for 3 months but can't attend it due to financial instability at the moment. I am looking for a job since I have just finished my study. I have been diagnosed with PTSD. My symptoms include: loss of self worth, self hate, trusting issues, irritability, easily startled, crying spills, constant arguments at home, and when in conflict I get so upset that I lose my sleep at night. I have also been diagnosed with depression. I have been diagnosed with depression about 10 yrs ago and it never seems to go away. This was the first time i have tried therapy and it was useful. I don't want to go on medication and be addicted to pills for the rest of my life. I am having so many troubles with relationships. This all related to childhood trauma which includes emotional, sexual, physical and verbal abuse. It is a mixture of everything and it is not going away. I am stressed and just not happy with myself.

So my question is that, can I overcome this illness own my own or do I need long therapy as my therapist said. Note: I can't afford therapy for the meanwhile and will continue once I find a job.

 

[SuicideSurvivor1994]

I hear how you're feeling. I recently found out my therapist, who I've been seeing for five years, is considered "out-of-network" with my insurance. Since some of my issues revolve around a fear of abandonment and extreme money anxiety, you can imagine this wasn't welcome news. Luckily, he is working with me to try to make it as affordable for me as possible.

I don't want to say you can do it without therapy, because I don't know. I know I couldn't. But, it doesn't look like it's an option for your right now either. Hopefully you have some friends and loved ones who can help you a bit, but in the end it's not fair to rely on them to be your therapist. I don't say this to make you feel hopeless either.... there may be some resources available to you.

I haven't been on here very long (just a week), but I've noticed that the people on here are very supportive and helpful. Maybe in the mean time, until you can get back into therapy, this forum can help a little.

I share your concerns about medication. My father committed suicide due to a bad reaction with medication. Still, my psychologist is trying to get me to see a reputable psychologist to see if it is something that might be appropriate for me. I trust him, but I'm not enthused about the idea either..... the alternative isn't good either though. I do tend to self-medicate a little bit with alcohol, which is bad, bad, bad I know.

For what it's worth, I think you've made a good step in coming here. It shows you have strength and you want to deal with this. That says a lot about you as a person.

 

[digger]

There was a thread recently which is not exactly the same as what you are asking, but might give you some suggestions of things you could try while you can't afford therapy.

https://www.myptsd.com/threads/healing-yourself-without-a-therapist-looking-for-guidance.39242/

If therapy is something you want to pursue, then some charities offer therapy and some therapists offer a sliding scale of fees so it's worth looking around.

 

[Bluerose]

Personally I think it’s possible especially if you like to read. In my view the bottom line is to be kind and gentle with yourself, refuse to beat yourself up for your struggle. The practise of meditation and relaxation along with the use of strong, positive affirmations can be a tremendous help. Having said that, I believe it seriously depends on the extent of the PTSD.

 

[Abstract]

Hi jess,
Sorry to hear things are tough both financially and because of PTSD. There are lots of things you can do to help yourself whilst you can't afford therapy.

You seem to also be considering not doing therapy longer term when you can afford it again. Is that so and if it is then I wondered why. Do you think you have fully accepted the seriousness of PTSD and what it means to have it?

I think there are times when therapy is extremely difficult because someone has been traumatised in therapy in the past. There are obvious great obstacles thereafter for the person. Other than that I believe everyone should have it when they have PTSD even though it may be difficult getting there.

It seems to me it is much more difficult to heal interpersonal trust and undo the effects of interpersonal violence when we are only doing it on our own and that that aspect of healing is part of what we need to do with PTSD. We can also get stuck going around in circles with certain things without a T to show us we are doing that. It's also a bit like me attempting to fix my car engine myself. There is a point where I will get to where my knowledge is not enough. I can and have to do a lot of work myself too of course - oil, water, checking the tires, protecting it, driving properly, learning to watch out for potholes, remembering to wear my glasses and to make sure the car gets to the mechanic- but a professional will help me do the last phase of what needs to be done. I may not know what the clanking sound coming from the engine is. I wouldn't want to process deeper trauma on my own as I would worry about safety but some people may feel they have enough coping skills and safety to do so.

For some, like me, there may be things they need to do first in order to get to the point of being able to tolerate or benefit from therapy. Many people struggle to benefit because of trust issues, lack of stability, attachment problems or other beliefs and issues. Peoples journeys will look very different from person to person. I do believe in peoples creativity.

If the person is at risk of harming someone else emotionally or physically then I don't think there is any choice and they need professional help immediately.

One thing that won't happen is that PTSD won't go away without a lot of hard work over a long period of time. I wonder if this is part of what you are asking?

 

[The Albatross]

Three months of therapy isn't very long.

Risk assessment had to do with whether or not I went into and then later stayed in therapy because my financial situation was not able to bear the additional burden when combined with my other medical issues at the time. The last time I was in therapy I was high risk for suicide and having random suicidal thoughts combined with memory retrieval and nightmares with disrupted sleep even though I have apnea.

In between therapy I do self study to educate myself on coping techniques and skill sets I didn't learn. I also use the time out of therapy to attempt to put into practice those things and self manage with the peer support here.

I had to ask myself seriously, if I was prepared to accept the consequences of having a untreated chronic illness/debility/injury... since that's what PTSD basically is. Then take a hard look at what areas of my life could be adversely affected if I attempted self management.

I have been fortunate that other than some work/employment relationships... my consequences have been few.

Reading back over your symptoms that you listed for instance, I think that there are some things that I personally would want to see improved to protect the relationships with the people who are involved with me before quitting. But I well understand the financial burden it places on my marriage.

For myself, I continued therapy until I began performing more consistently and started experiencing periods of calm, peace and some strings of neutral and occasionally good days. I took those as evidence that my base starting point was inching incrementally back to a more favorable place for stability and safety. I hope this helps you.

 

[Bedbug]

I think everyone is different so there will be no single, correct, answer to this question.

I have not had any therapy and, at the moment, do not wish to have any. It doesn't feel like the right thing to do for me, but I understand that I am in a minority on this forum.

Before I developed PTSD, I had already heard stories of people going through many, many therapists and a great deal of additional trauma, before finding one that is helpful. I was also aware that some therapists will encourage the belief that therapy is the only route to healing (it's what pays their salary after all). Of course, I had also heard of good therapists transforming people's lives in positive ways. When I developed PTSD, I felt incredibly vulnerable and did not want to take the risk of going into therapy. It felt like a further loss of control which potentially put me at risk of additional damage. I decided that the better risk, for me, was to try self-help to begin with. If at any point, I thought that was not working, I would look at other options.

For me, self-help doesn't mean going it alone. I knew almost nothing about PTSD when it first took over my life, so I had very few resources within myself to draw on. I read and read and read. Without the knowledge of professionals and the fellowship of other sufferers I would be in a far worse position now. Someone suffering from my symptoms even relatively recently would not have had these resources to draw upon. I am very fortunate that there is so much understanding now and that there is so much information readily available.

I knew that sharing my experiences would help me to make sense of my thoughts and feelings but, like I said, I was uncomfortable with the idea of talking to a therapist. Instead, I shared my experiences with my husband and later on this forum. In both cases, I have been careful about exactly what I have shared, bearing in mind that the people I was talking to were not professionally trained. For the most part, I have only discussed the impact of my trauma on my life and not the details of the trauma itself. I don't think it would be fair to share details.

It is not a requirement of recovery that all these details are shared, or even remembered. Again, that comes down to your personal circumstances. Some will need to, others won't. If this is something you want to pursue then I would suggest that therapy might be necessary for your recovery.

With my husband I have also made a point of making sure that he is comfortable with the conversation. Initially I was quite selfish with my own needs and overlooked the impact I was having on him. We have both learned to draw boundaries and communicate them with each other better. I also try to always ask if he is happy to talk at all before I start. Sometimes he is not in a position to have a conversation that he would be comfortable with another time.

Do you have anyone in your life who can offer you support? I could not have come as far as I have without my husband. Having his support has definitely influenced my decision to continue self-help without therapy.

Do you have much knowledge of skills to help you deal with the symptoms you describe? I sometimes feel like I could write a book on grounding techniques, mindfulness, breathing exercises, ways to calm my anxiety, recognising triggers, controlling my anger and identifying small steps towards recovery, but that does not mean I am always very skillful at applying them. My husband and the people on this forum have given me a lot of guidance, support and encouragement. I understand that some people find the additional guidance of a therapist very beneficial but, like I said, it's not for me. It's a personal choice (except, like others have said when the individual's judgement is so impaired that they are not capable of making that choice for themselves). What do you feel comfortable with? What do you need? You must do what is best for you.

So long as I am making progress (which I monitor by referring to my list of things I want to achieve and the small steps I can take towards achieving them), and I am not having too much of a negative affect on others around me (harder to judge, but my husband is guiding me), I will not go into therapy. However, I recognise that my approach is not for everyone. Perhaps my healing will take longer. Who knows. But I do know that I am comfortable with my decision and I am making progress.

I wish you all the best in your recovery, however you decide to pursue it.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

Just a thought....

Most psychiatric meds don't cause addiction. Only a few can cause dependence in certain people (not all people), and many doctors won't prescribe those anyway. I'd hate for your misconception of medication to rule out a powerful healing tool.

 

[anonymous]

and I am not having too much of a negative affect on others around me .., I will not go into therapy.

This concerns me. You have acted out with physical violence both in a flashback and without being in a flashback and recently. What happens if that occurs again and maybe even to someone who isn't your husband? Are you waiting until you do significant damage again before you get professional help? What impact would a court case have on your life? From what you shared before I think you need intensive treatment to start to get you to place where you are safer. At the least an anger management course. Self help is good but it takes longer and won't show up your blind spots and your husband doesn't have the training to recognise them or to show them up or know what to do about it. This sounds so much like the stories we repeatedly hear on the supporter section.

 

[arfie]

Trying to do it on my own was devastating in my personal case. However, I too, have faced many, many obstacles with keeping psychiatric professionals on retainer. Everything from personal financial shortages to clinics closing down. I fill the gaps with whatever is available. Support groups. Religious or school counselors. A bum under a bridge. It doesn't seem too ideal, but it is what I have to work with. I have to take charge, but no, I do not try to do it alone. My PTSD is not a safe neighborhood to travel alone.

But each case is unique. Gentle sustenance while you figure out yours, Jess.

 

[Bedbug]

Without wishing to go too far off topic...

I admit that I acted violently on two occasions and I am deeply ashamed of that. For a while I did consider going into therapy (after seeking advice on this forum, as you know) but I later decided against it. However, I have not been ignoring what happened. Just because I have not gone into therapy does not mean that I have not sought help, made great efforts to change and made progress.

I appreciate your concern, but I would ask that you respect my decision in this instance.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

I fully agree with Anonymous. If someone is physically lashing out, they need professional help. Otherwise you're playing with fire. If, God forbid, you get violent with a stranger and it goes to court, you have no leg to stand on by using dissociation as your defense after the fact as your disorder and symptoms aren't documented. It's like playing with fire.

But, as I have said in other threads, there are those who are dead set on doing exactly what they're doing. I kinda feel bad that there are so many resources to help in healing, but these resources are rejected out of fear. It's kind of like the PTSD/trauma is winning all over again.

Back to the original poster...

I know for a fact that I couldn't heal as much as I have without professional help. What I have learned in therapy can't be achieved by reading a book. It is a newer type of treatment that isn't very widespread, and while there IS a book written by its creator, it's so darn technical that I have a hard time reading it, and I've been through the treatment. Many treatment processes simply can't be achieved on your own. For example, EMDR on YouTube isn't really EMDR.