Broken

[nicoleanne06]

I am not sure if it is because I am getting to core trauma work but I have been feeling completely broken lately. It is quite ironic because I want to be held and comforted by a man (I am single so there isn't said man available!) yet the trauma that I deal with has men being abusers. I feel caught in such a haze the past week or so. I just so desperately want to feel loved by someone other than my 3 year old son. I want to be comforted and not immediately feel that men are going to hurt me. I am so stuck in a broken and damaged state right now and I am not sure how to logically talk myself out of that feeling. I know I am not alone and probably quite a few of ya'll have felt this way. Any pointers on getting myself out of this paper bag?

 

[lukesa]

Hey, first of all, kudos on accepting the task of doing trauma work. I completed CPT and it was.... very hard, the emotions it stirred up took all the time I wasn't in session to healthily cope with them.

Months later I feel like I have a new, healthier, more stable baseline for me to deal with my emotions or onsider future work.

Just remember that when these emotions do stir, its an opportunity to look ar them, as them occuring is a normal pert of trauma work, it gets worse then gets much much better. Its very worth the effort, stay strong and remember that not everything I think or feel is true and its okay to let this happen and go its course while ot has to so I can feel healthy later.

If you're going throuh hell, keep going :)

Edit: not to be vague, I'm saying that I used the worsening rough times as a better stage for me to do my cpt work. The more obvious the symtoms as they temporarily worsened, the better (however absoluetely aweful) or easier for me to pinpoint and work on them in the very short, temporary, and worthwhile period of doing cpt workr

 

[The Albatross]

Any chance you can shift the idea of being comforted by someone away from "a man" none being available and see it as a challenge to learn/acquire some skill sets to nurture or comfort yourself? Situations can be opportunities. I had to develop some sense of autonomy and ability to self sustain during the worst of the trauma work. I did an independent study on self parenting while doing the heavy stuff in therapy.

Even though I had a man at home, the relationship was broken and severely damaged... so I worked on what I could effect change in that was most likely to yield results. For me that was self acceptance/love/respect/nurturing or sustaining. Hope this helps some?

 

[cherryblossom]

I completed CPT

Just curious - what's CPT?

 

[lukesa]

Just curious - what's CPT?

Cognative processing therapy. Its the trauma portion of ptsd work in the line of theraphy my hospital used while I was a guest there. A very useful process

 

[cherryblossom]

Is it similar to CBT (cognitive behavioural therapy)?

 

[lukesa]

Yes, very closely, but it is the trauma portion

It has a slightly different toolset and is much more intense obviosuly but having a groundwork with 3/5 columsn, chain analysis, etc will help a lot.

Sorry for typos I'm on a phone

 

[Deleted member 19804]

I know exactly how that feels and I'm afraid I don't really have great pointers on that matter. I would sometimes curl up under a blanket with a pillow or even a teddy bear (I know that sounds strange, but at least it's something to hold) watching a comedy tv-show or listening to soothing music. Hope that helps a little.