S
severelyhopeless
Hi all,
I've never done this before but I wanted to come on here and say my situation. My gf and I have been in an incredible relationship over the past 5 months. She is not my first relationship, but I am her first love. She is severely traumatized from childhood and adulthood (recent) SA. We have worked through her panic attacks and I have been patient and always attentive to when she feels a panic attack coming on. Even smells have triggered her.
We had a such an amazing past few months, she told my friends on my birthday that she wants to marry me. We talked ab moving in and our careers and were giddy to see each other everytime. She even stopped having panic attacks during sex.
The other night I was drunk and trying to be flirty, asking "wanna f?" We normally are very sexual and this was nothing out of the ordinary until she said she didn't want to bc I was drunk and she was sober. I asked if I could just see her bc I miss her. She said yes ofc, but no sex. I was upset and irrationally asking "why can't I see you, I just wanna see you" I also added that "I don't know why she's drawing the line now, we've had sex when one of us was drunk and on of us was sober". I was drunk and not making any sense at the point.
She stopped answering, the next morning I apologized profusely and was embarrassed. She Said she needed space and time and I was disrespectful. She ended up coming over and getting extremely angry at me, brought all my stuff as well to break up with me. She said she needs space and time and sobbed while holding me saying she's sorry. We hugged and kissed and have a date to talk and reconnect.
I have never been more guilty in my life. I don't know what I can do but I am so devastated by this breakup, I don't know if I can wait a month to find out if we will get back together or not. Please give me some advice. I know I messed up badly but I have never and would never do something like this again. I don't know if
I've never done this before but I wanted to come on here and say my situation. My gf and I have been in an incredible relationship over the past 5 months. She is not my first relationship, but I am her first love. She is severely traumatized from childhood and adulthood (recent) SA. We have worked through her panic attacks and I have been patient and always attentive to when she feels a panic attack coming on. Even smells have triggered her.
We had a such an amazing past few months, she told my friends on my birthday that she wants to marry me. We talked ab moving in and our careers and were giddy to see each other everytime. She even stopped having panic attacks during sex.
The other night I was drunk and trying to be flirty, asking "wanna f?" We normally are very sexual and this was nothing out of the ordinary until she said she didn't want to bc I was drunk and she was sober. I asked if I could just see her bc I miss her. She said yes ofc, but no sex. I was upset and irrationally asking "why can't I see you, I just wanna see you" I also added that "I don't know why she's drawing the line now, we've had sex when one of us was drunk and on of us was sober". I was drunk and not making any sense at the point.
She stopped answering, the next morning I apologized profusely and was embarrassed. She Said she needed space and time and I was disrespectful. She ended up coming over and getting extremely angry at me, brought all my stuff as well to break up with me. She said she needs space and time and sobbed while holding me saying she's sorry. We hugged and kissed and have a date to talk and reconnect.
I have never been more guilty in my life. I don't know what I can do but I am so devastated by this breakup, I don't know if I can wait a month to find out if we will get back together or not. Please give me some advice. I know I messed up badly but I have never and would never do something like this again. I don't know if
