What Have You Learned From Therapy?

[rainy_daze]

Personally, I think I still have work to do on areas in my life, but that I can do this without therapy. I've learned a lot from using this forum. I learned things from my therapist and in the last session (ending session) I really didn't want to leave the room. I think when I have more time away from therapy, I will be able to reflect more on what I learned there.

I think the biggest thing I learned was to put the blame for trauma on the people responsible. I did nothing wrong, I couldn't prevent any of it, a great deal of time has passed and I would like to be happy. I also learned I could open up to someone, and they wouldn't use that as an opportunity to hurt me.

There's more, but I haven't had enough space or time to think about the last session much yet. I even took notes :bookworm::) so I can read over them.

I'm interested in what people think they have learned from therapy (regardless of the type)?

I'm also interested in how you coped with the ending of therapy, when it feels painful?

 

[Me Myself and I]

The most important thing I've learnt, is to listen to my body better. To be aware of all the signs -allerts- for probable triggers as well as (soon to be attacks), and find a way to calm, prevent any "bad" reaction from happening!!

After I had my theraphy I am no longer scared of my attacks (panick attacks - scratching - biting - screaming) now everything tends to be calmer and safer. Thanks to therpay and to ME. :D

 

[Lionheart]

One thing I have learned in therapy is that I am as much an expert on 'my traumas' if not more so, than the doctors and therapists are.

I have learned how to use my hypervigilence to stay aware of negative thought patterns and learned how to correct them to something more positive and realistic.

I have learned self-examination and the difference between healthy and dysfunctional forms of communication and thinking.

I've learned to identify, feel, express and let go of my feelings.

There is more but I will have to think about what other things I have learned.

 

[rainy_daze]

I will make a bullet point list soon, that way I won't type too long a post. I know they can be hard to read sometimes. I will also avoid the thread until I've done so, that way my learning will be from my notes.

However, thank you @Me Myself and I and @Lionheart777 for responding so quickly and honestly :).

 

[silkleaves]

I've learned to be more aware of what I'm doing, and coping techniques to help me when I'm wound up. Before therapy, once I would start in on a "moment" it would last for weeks, sometimes months. Now I have it down to where, in the past year, the longest it has lasted is a few days to a week. Still not great, but a heck of a lot better than I was feeling before.

I also learned that I'm not alone. I really felt for awhile there that everyone and the world would be better off without me, but I guess, meeting others going through the same thing I was in group, looking at them and thinking, but you don't deserve that! Kind of helped me realize that 1) its not just me 2) there's a possibility I don't deserve it either, but just can't see it for myself. I still have my dark moments, but not nearly as many or as intense.

And well just, extras that I learned...like what disassociation is, what ruminating is, bits of how and why my trauma is still affecting me, why I can't just "get over it" that this is something I really need to work on, etc...

 

[Ladyghosthunter]

Absolutely nothing. I look at them using psychobabble to try to explain my pain and how I feel.

Although I am watching my language, I look at them through my seeing and empathic abilities to see that the majority of them have no idea of what my pain is, how to get rid of it, how to deal with it or even to step into my shoes to "see" what I've been through.

Now I go see a psychiatrist for medication, not bad because they don't ask a lot of questions as I don't like being put on the spot. With each individual trauma, it would take me to the grave to try to figure out even where to start to heal. The best way, in my opinion, to heal is to just concentrate on the here and now and let the past be the past. I've learned from it, good and bad and go from there.

 

[rainy_daze]

• To keep going.
• To trust my gut sometimes.
• Be aware not to fall into self-blame.
• People make mistakes, including myself, and that is fine.
• To look after my basic needs.
• To remember to put myself first sometimes.
• To decide what is best for me.
• To talk about things.
• To be fine with being myself.

There are other lessons I'm sure. Like grounding myself in the here and now.

I'm finding now therapy is over it's quite a difficult adjustment.

 

[rainy_daze]

just concentrate on the here and now and let the past be the past

That's a good point Ladyghosthunter. I'm struggling with stressors in the present at the moment. It's very draining. It does make me think that I've moved on a lot from the past. PTSD is still there, and I think I'll always want to just be able to switch it off, or hide it, or pretend I'm fine when I'm not.

In the here and now, I know things could be worse. Maybe that is why I keep on going.

@Ladyghosthunter it's good you have learned lessons about what works for you, even if therapists haven't worked out.

I still have my dark moments, but not nearly as many or as intense

It sounds like big progress silkleaves. I'm thinking it sounds normal too. It sounds like healing to me.

I've learned to identify, feel, express and let go of my feelings

I find the expressing and letting go of emotions the hardest part. Sometimes the emotions are so big or deep, it can be difficult. I'm finding trying to breathe is important. I'm struggling because sometimes expressing how I feel just upsets other people. I'm not sure what to do about that.

everything tends to be calmer and safer

Wonderful :).

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I was a basket case when I first started therapy and I have had good therapists and bad therapists. After nine years of therapy, I realized if I do not learn to think for myself I will always be in therapy so my next therapy appointment I quit and walked away.

I went back to other therapists when I need a tune up to get back on track, but I finally have common sense and can think for myself.

I love myself now and I started therapy when I was thirty and I am fifty nine now.

I have real joy in my life and I nurture it like the seedling it is.

I wish you the best in your journey of healing and recovery.

 

[Lady of Longbourn]

How to be myself and that it is okay.

How to be assertive and that doesn't just make me a 'smart mouth'. :mad:

 

[Northgirl]

I've struggled with letting people care for me and what I've been through, so maybe one of the biggest things has been learning how to be vulnerable with the few people I've learned to trust. Self care has been a huge (and reluctant) goal but I've come a long ways on that issue too. I still have a ton of progress to make on stopping the self blame and negative thoughts but overall therapy has just increased my self-awareness to help me not feel like I'm my worst enemy.

 

[shell]

I have learnt that I am not responsible for my abuse, that I am not defective, and unacceptable and unlovable. I have learnt some of the basics I missed as a child, self respect, self acceptance and self care, to be assertive and to recognize my needs, and that it is acceptable to be angry and that I don't need to turn it inwards and attack myself.

Therapy taught me to see that I project my parents beliefs onto others, and that other people don't hate me, or want to harm me, and has help me start to allow others to be closer to me. It made me see that I was not helpless, and I am not a failure, therapy opened up a world of possibilities.