Differences Between Combat And Abuse Related Ptsd

[Ed Norton]

I never talk about it ever to anyone, now. It, quite simply, never occured. The downside( to my T ) is that I don't make friends and social connections. The upside is I don't want new friends or social connections.

 

[scout86]

I have a client who served in Iraq. He happens to be the local VA rep at the court house. The first time we met, for reasons that I can't imagine, we ended up talking about the war, PTSD, etc. I shared that I had it (and didn't want to talk about it.) He told me a spectacular story about a rather gory flashback that had me laughing as he described the phantom of a burning comrade that showed up in response to the smell of diesel fuel. (I knew where that was going WAY before he got to the punch line and somehow laughing seemed like the only reasonable thing to do. We both laughed.)

Anyway, he eventually said that "some of the things that happen in war just need to stay there. The people back here don't need to know that stuff." I know what he meant. I say the same thing about stuff that happened to me. The thing is, I think he's wrong. I think as long as war seems easy, people will send others to do it with WAY too little thought. It's not that there's nothing worth fighting for or worth dying for, if it comes to that, it just shouldn't be stupid shit.

But then, later on, when I thought about it, I couldn't come up with a good reason that same line of thinking doesn't apply to me....... (But, obviously, it doesn't, right? :whistling:)

 

[EveHarrington]

It makes me quite sad to read posts like this. Everyone, no matter what the cause of their PTSD, deserves validation. Feelings of shame only function to burden us and hinder our healing. The weight of my shame is enough to sink an ocean liner, but it doesn't include shame due to the cause of my PTSD i.e. non-military versus military. Since diagnosis I've been fortunate in that nobody has ever told me that PTSD is only for veterans, and most everyone has been compassionate and understanding (on one level or another). I know very much how feelings of shame weigh you down. (The focus of my healing right now is on ridding myself of shame.) I hope that for those who have been shamed for having a certain kind of PTSD, that you can see that you aren't "lesser than" in any way, shape, or form. This disorder is a bear to live through, and there is no need for others to make you feel even worse.

The next time someone shamed you, just snap back at them "shame on you for shaming me!" (Followed by a well thought out retort as to why you don't deserve to be shamed.) Yes, I do think I will use this line the next time I encounter shaming behavior. There's no greater feeling than pushing back the shame to the person who is shaming you. That is, don't take on their burdens.

 

[dnp]

The US military marketing budget blows my mind. From what I've read, $473 million spent on advertising in fiscal year 2011. $88 million spent on a Nascar sponsorship. $53 million to sports teams in recent years. They are like any other mega-corporation branding themselves to the public. If I had a $500 million per year budget I could push any cause I wanted to.

 

[Anarchy]

I'll second the idea that the truth of what happens in war should be more widely known.

The idealism that I see portrayed time and again is hardly conducive to informed consent, and to that extent the military guys are victims of abuse.

I'll use WWI as an example of the type of deception ( no survivors left alive to piss off by my using it). Who the f would sign up to the glorious cause of preventing Britain from concluding a negotiated peace in 1916 so that the Rockefellers and the Morgans speculation on british war bonds wouldn't risk going sour?

And what of the wider outcome of the war to make the world safe for Vlad Lenin, Benito Mussolini, Adolph Hitler?

You guys are bright enough to see the parallels to Bush the elder and Bush the dumber's exploits in the middle East, and what that has made the world safe for.

In terms of a clearer public understanding of PTSD, there's a lot of it that the only way people can handle the shit is to minimise it down to a manageable size, us lot here included.

I think ordinary Joe and Jane would be shocked and astonished to learn that for every military PTSD case in the English speaking world, there are something like fifty to one hundred people with PTSD from sexual abuse or sex assault ( that's based on using the threads here as proxies for numbers of sufferers).

I'm not sure that I'd want people who don't have PTSD themselves, learning to spot the signs. I actually appreciate being invisible to most people.

 

[ghotiff]

the only way people can handle the shit is to minimise it down to a manageable size, us lot here included.

Minimize and/or deny. It's interesting that you make the point that both suffers and "normals" can both do it

 

[Anarchy]

I haven't got my thoughts straight on this yet, so I might well contradict what I'm writing here at some time in the future...

Minimisation of our experience by others can be hideously invalidating. Non of us find it easy to go near a trauma memory, even if we manage to stay anchored in the present, rather than getting dragged back into the trauma, it's still so difficult. If we try to stay above it, our flat monotone voice doesn't give the person that we are speaking to, the feeling that it was something very real.

But (big one), if we really took the other person back there, they'd likely end up being vicariously traumatised.

There was a post by one of our German members (female, musician) a year or more ago, where she had taken a video of her being tortured to her T appointment and the T had insisted on staying with her to watch it, instead of getting out of the room like they were supposed to. a very bad move on the T's part.

I think that minimisation is a way for both people with PTSD and those who we share bits of our experiences with, to stay out of the real horror of what actually happened.

If something is too big for someone to handle, it's too big for them to handle.

 

[scout86]

I think that minimisation is a way for both people with PTSD and those who we share bits of our experiences with, to stay out of the real horror of what actually happened.

That's what I've always thought. But my T keeps insisting that he can hear anything I can say.... And I'm sure he's hear worse than any stories I have to tell. Unless he's blowing smoke, and I'm starting to think he's not, there's something else involved. I think there are things that some people can't handle. And I think there are things some people can't handle yet. But I think that depends on knowing HOW to handle stuff, more than it depends on the nature of the stuff.

 

[Ronin]

The downside( to my T ) is that I don't make friends and social connections. The upside is I don't want new friends or social connections.

Sorry to thread derail but lmao this. The best, Ed. :hilarious: :D

 

[Deleted member 28740]

Media link I posted. Link Removed

This is not singularly war related. What a loss. Suicide.

 

[Deleted member 28740]

Watching this, I see the reaction when he talks about those you trust harming you profoundly. On coming home, his young brother "You are not my brother any more."

I am no longer who I was. My family can not parse this, or me, or myself. Only two friends can hold both who I was and who I am and not recoil, judge, ignore, remove, a pat on the back and all will be fine, get some rest.

Many have the mind set of mind over matter. Another's pain is always hard to comprehend or respond to. With people you are close too this is a dilemma, share or not? Wanting to be understood, knowing that they can't understand it at all, altered beyond comprehension. You are not you anymore. Their fear is not lack of love. Remind self of that.

 

[Chava]

I don't compare...totally doesn't matter to me. But I do see some general differences, aside from the shared hypervigilance or numbness (either extreme). Since combat PTSD happens in adulthood, it seems more often accompanied by horrid flashbacks. With early childhood trauma (physical, sexual abuse), dissociation is more prevalent. So the re-experiencing component often seems different from what I read around here...sometimes reenacting, more body memories or confusing ways of re-experiencing. Any of these traumas can lead to rage and aggression, towards self or other. Really early trauma rarely includes visual flashbacks, but often becomes somewhat imbedded into the personality...and also expresses itself in the more dissociative ways.

So all trauma is terrible. I see no reason for comparison. All PTSD traumas have a component of re-experiencing and also avoidance. How that is expressed seems to differ some based on the trauma and the age of the trauma. So it's helpful to understand the nature of individual traumas, but a little pointless to compare. I was raped in my teens....I'd say that was obviously as bad as rape for anyone else. But I was diagnosed with PTSD because I crumbled. I had earlier traumas and was already self destructing and dissociative. So that was the breaking point where I began my suicide attempts and many trips to rehab for alcoholism. The same trauma, while certifiably traumatic, might not even become PTSD for someone with a more stable background. So general comparisons are useless. The basic criteria make sense. The expressions of the symptoms vary.