News Royal Commission & Cardinal Pell

[Sideways]

Is anyone following the news reports on Australia's Royal Commission on child sex abuse, or the questioning of Cardinal Pell at the moment?

Does anyone have any thoughts, because I'm finding it really distressing & have no idea what to make of it...is it even making the news elsewhere in the world??

 

[ms spock]

I am watching and reading. I have had an interest in Pell's activities for quite a long time now.

I am sorry that you are feeling distressed.

 

[Sideways]

This is gonna sound like a stupid question, but this stuff they've been covering up - it's really awful, right? I mean, is 'outrage' an appropriate response?

 

[Sideways]

This is me practicing saying what I'm feeling, because people say that helps...

Australia's most powerful Catholic, Cardinal Pell, has admitted in the witness stand that he did nothing, absolutely nothing, when he was told about serious and systemic child sex abuse by Catholic priests.

I'm not Catholic, but this stuff is very close to home for me.

I have never (& likeky will never) report my abuse to authorities.

But reading about the response that I could get if I did, if I do decide to disclose what happened - knowing that such well educated & powerful men would ignore it - it makes me feel like I should shut the f**k up and get over it, because it's not a big deal to the people who matter.

It's making me get panicked reading about it. I think I'd really like to cry, but I can't, because it's not a big deal. I feel like he's saying that what happened to me is not a big deal, and not worthy of any attention, let alone help.

 

[Sideways]

Ok... My head didn't explode after writing that. Feels pretty yuck, but I think I've got the gonads to add:

Why is it so easy for me to get outraged on behalf of victims who I can relate to, and yet feel disgusted by the thought that I might dare to feel outraged for myself?

And why is just the picture of a 74 year old man in the paper enough to make me feel so intimidated and unsure of myself???

 

[Sideways]

Getting there, v slowly.

For years I've had therapists trying to tell me what I was taught as a kid was wrong. They tell me that God didn't create me "special like Ev, that God didn't "give my body" to the man who abused me, and that I am not a "Whore of God".

But I am. Clearly. If my therapists were right, and this really has nothing to do with God, why the hell does the church go to such great lengths to protect these men? Pell seems to get it - I'm not relevant beyond the "special purpose" God created me for.

And I'm gonna take a moment and then hit 'Post'. And I will have said it. For once. F**k that's hard.

 

[LuckyDuck]

Getting there, v slowly.

For years I've had therapists trying to tell me what I was taught as a...

The reason why is if he folds and tells, the rest have to. It would be a big blow to their power.

Basically, money and power. And not one that comes from a god.

 

[ms spock]

This is me practicing saying what I'm feeling, because people say that helps...

Australia's most powerful Catholic, Cardinal Pell, has admitted in the witness stand that he did nothing, absolutely nothing, when he was told about serious and systemic child sex abuse by Catholic priests.

It is great to read you saying what you are feeling! That is really scary and hard to do. I find it really, really, really hard.

I have never (& likeky will never) report my abuse to authorities.

I am so sorry that you were abused. I am so sorry that we live in societies that do not protect children and

But reading about the response that I could get if I did, if I do decide to disclose what happened - knowing that such well educated & powerful men would ignore it - it makes me feel like I should shut the f**k up and get over it, because it's not a big deal to the people who matter.

That is why what he did is so horrendous. He helped author and cover up a lot of abuse. There are people who talk about being sexually abused by him. I hope that one day he is charged for what he did - but as we know powerful people in the churches and other organisations don't get brought to the attention of the authorities.

It's making me get panicked reading about it. I think I'd really like to cry, but I can't, because it's not a big deal. I feel like he's saying that what happened to me is not a big deal, and not worthy of any attention, let alone help.

Yes that is pretty much what a lot of other people feel and think as well. You are not alone.

And no matter how someone abuses their position of power - the abused/survivors always deserve support help, love, care, understanding, being heard, being witnessed and you are so worthy of the attention that will help you heal and thrive.

I am so sorry to read, that you, too, have been sexually abused.

 

[ms spock]

This is gonna sound like a stupid question, but this stuff they've been covering up - it's really awful, right? I mean, is 'outrage' an appropriate response?

Not a stupid question at all. It is the appropriate response.

 

[Sideways]

Say it really does just boil down to them protecting their wealth & power - there's more than one way they could have done that. They choose to use the method of 'ignore & cover up', so the abuse itself remains an irrelevant concern.

And maybe I'm making an irrational leap here, but if the abuse was so irrelevant, and protecting the institution of the church is paramount, their response to reports of abuse seems like the church is actually condoning it, like what the priests were doing was still the 'holy work of god'.

 

[ms spock]

Ok... My head didn't explode after writing that. Feels pretty yuck, but I think I've got the gonads to add:

You are very brave!

Why is it so easy for me to get outraged on behalf of victims who I can relate to, and yet feel disgusted by the thought that I might dare to feel outraged for myself?

You had to split off from yourself - so what you are feeling is very common for a survivor of sexual abuse.

And why is just the picture of a 74 year old man in the paper enough to make me feel so intimidated and unsure of myself???

Because the effects of abuse are far reaching and vibrate to the core of our being.

 

[LuckyDuck]

"Overlooking" is probably the best descriptive word I've found. They will overlook if money and power are still available to them. Which makes them all culpable.