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Search results

  1. Warrior Chicken

    How are you coping with Epstein news? (not a debate thread)

    How it’s affecting me. I know all too well what some humans are capable of. What lengths they go to in order to collect their trophies, be it the victims they manipulate, the systems they orchestrate, or the high profile people they influence and collect (many who are complicit). It’s not...
  2. Warrior Chicken

    I really lost my temper today and I am not proud of it.

    Not sure where you’re located but this has become a common acceptable fact for trades and deliveries where I am. They give you a window, expect you to rearrange whatever day you may have with zero regard for your own life-demands. Or ever your livelihood. Then, they don’t show. Say oops, we got...
  3. Warrior Chicken

    Childhood If your parent neglected or abused you, please just say me too

    It’s all so very much in my face this weekend with a family reunion I can’t avoid (the secrets we hide and no one knows). I get it.
  4. Warrior Chicken

    I plan on taking propranolol for my anxiety, good idea?

    Have also taken this med for high anxiety events on a very limited basis. I’m sure it works differently for each person. For me it lowers HR and evens it out. Cannot do any mildly vigorous activity while on it. If it were me, I’d get a second medical opinion cuz many doctors have very...
  5. Warrior Chicken

    Do I have to be angry?

    Not fully sure about neuropathways/brain development - perhaps a component of the whole that contributed to the mental damage? But more so with this piece of my life that anger was unsafe and resulted in further harm. Truly, if any emotion was shown. The difference in my case is that later as...
  6. Warrior Chicken

    Do I have to be angry?

    Woah 🤯 @Ecdysis That tracks for me. Gotta think on this.
  7. Warrior Chicken

    Do I have to be angry?

    I also struggle with anger as a concept. I’ve tried to explore my own anger as it relates to specific trauma. Using imagery to access what emotions are there and working on shifting the massive self blame to where it actually belongs. I’d get frustrated with myself cuz I just couldn’t be angry...
  8. Warrior Chicken

    Caring for children

    I think that if I’d had to care for younger siblings or other children I maybe would have an easier time with decisions on this. Instead, I was the youngest and mostly just found myself fending for myself as we siblings railed against each other rather than banded together to survive. I made...
  9. Warrior Chicken

    Caring for children

    The topic that’s bothering me is one that I think will have multiple perspectives depending on many different factors. It bothers me because it brings me back to my own past experiences which are also likely clouding my judgement and causing certain reactions. So, I thought I’d post it here...
  10. Warrior Chicken

    Christmas Birthdays

    Yeah, you’re generally spot on there. Though sometimes I’m not sure it’s just an individual peculiarity and hence my check-in with the trusted community here who I appreciate favours honesty. Your view is always welcomed by me. Thanks. I must be from the same generation as this one lol My...
  11. Warrior Chicken

    Christmas Birthdays

    I’ve recently wondered if others who share a birthday around Christmas experience similar sentiments - - guilt for receiving’more’ presents than others. - need to balance gift giving by giving more to others - shame for receiving an extra present This sounds childish and ridiculous to write...
  12. Warrior Chicken

    Days We Look Forward To Are Dangerous.

    Resonates like mad. Dangerous days give that raison d’être. Give me a mission worthy of danger and I’ll give you a life worth living. It’s the success at the end of the danger I look forward to.
  13. Warrior Chicken

    What’s your experience - years after death of a loved one

    I listen to others as they recall memories of their loved ones and they seem complete. Like they have full access to them including emotions that arise. I don’t. It’s more like things got erased. This happened lots with my trauma stuff. Until it re-emerged when I began therapy because of one...
  14. Warrior Chicken

    What’s your experience - years after death of a loved one

    Thanks for sharing your experiences everyone. It does help me to see that grief is an entirely individual experience and though there are common phases. Each person has a unique perspective based on their own dealings with grief. For me, I do have a similar experience with pets vs people. It’s...
  15. Warrior Chicken

    What’s your experience - years after death of a loved one

    Curious to know of others experience with the loss of a loved one years after their death. I feel that mine is unusual, which is partly why I’m asking. Before I get into my own experience, I’d like to hear about yours.
  16. Warrior Chicken

    Thrown off my schedule 🫤

    This also happens to me. It’s massively frustrating cause it seems to be more noticeable (obviously) when I really need to focus on the task at hand rather than be swept up in minutiae. In my circumstance it also worsens when there’s an increase in the number of interactions I have to navigate...
  17. Warrior Chicken

    Use of substances to manage sex.

    Logically, I do fully understand that I can say no and sometimes I do. The trouble I have is that the wounded part of me with regards to sex would be just fine NEVER having sex. That’s not an option though, and it is something I wonder if I can change one day. This piece is one that dominates...
  18. Warrior Chicken

    Use of substances to manage sex.

    Did how you perceive the use of substances change over time or has it been constant? As in, was it shameful at one time? I have started to become less judgmental of myself when using a substance to get through sex, but I really wonder if there will be a day when I don’t rely on it like I do now...
  19. Warrior Chicken

    Use of substances to manage sex.

    Hey there, i just wonder if others out there have a tough time with sexual intimacy in committed relationships. For me, I know it’s a result of my history. No matter how much self-work I’ve done to process stuff it’s still tough. Granted, I have made progress, but I’m not where I’d like to be...
  20. Warrior Chicken

    I miss…

    I miss going to the beach as a kid with my dog Dixie. She was the best piece of my childhood. Thanks pup!
  21. Warrior Chicken

    I Have No Words For This Experience - My dad used to kill my pets in front of me in a violent way, implying I would be next.

    I am also left without many words to find meaning in these kinds of acts that are perpetrated to cause layers of harm in their wake. Our experiences are different but pieces of what I understand about mine may resonate with you. When something we love is destroyed by someone we have no other...
  22. Warrior Chicken

    Does your stress increase before vacation?

    When I’m steady and grounded it’s almost impossible to have those conversations with my partner, but I try. Lately I’m in the murky waters of my past, so having that conversation will likely not happen. I absolutely understand that it would be better for both of us if these kinds of open...
  23. Warrior Chicken

    Does your stress increase before vacation?

    Different layers….the unknown is one. If there’s no objective then it’s difficult to plan around. Relaxation holds pressure for me cuz I don’t know if it will be successful. My partner puts a lot of stock into how successful a vacation is by if I seem relaxed and connected. Intimacy is a lot of...
  24. Warrior Chicken

    Does your stress increase before vacation?

    I’m wondering if this occurs for others and may or may not be connected with ptsd…. Vacation alone ——> yay!! No stress, no worry. Whatever comes up you’ll handle like a pro. You look forward to it Vacation with significant other/friend/family ——> stress spikes and you’d rather not go.
  25. Warrior Chicken

    Feels like I’m falling apart

    Great! I don’t know if you’re someone who is exceptionally hard on themselves and holds themselves to an exceedingly high standard. Many of us on the forum are by virtue of some of our experiences unfortunately….so, that “doing” you write of, means a lot. Don’t forget though, it’s ok to do...
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