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Oof, can I relate to this. I have a job, but often the contact with other people makes me more lonely--I see how easily they relate, how strong their connections are to others, and it is all so foreign. I do a sports class and go to church and both of those things require regular, positive...

Exactly. A psychiatrist is more likely to be more familiar with the drugs, the dosages, and the combinations that can relieve mental symptoms. A GP is certainly competent, but might not be the most skilled person to do the prescribing. A lot of GPs in my area will not prescribe mental health...

A lot of dentists have been trained in working with abuse victims (I've read several articles that indicate this, anyway). Maybe it would help if you told the dentist what you needed and he could say whether he was able to work that way (i.e., I get scared and will need to be able to take breaks...

Doctors will diagnose us differently depending on the symptoms they see, the information they have, and the knowledge and experience they have in diagnosing psychiatric issues. Keep in mind a GP does not have the training that a psychologist or psychiatrist would have in identifying mental...

Your T wouldn't be coming back to work if she weren't able to work. I'm sure she would appreciate it if you said something like, "I'm sorry you had an ill family member. I have been thinking of your family during this difficult time." A good T knows not to make the session about her, but she can...

I often use this adjective to describe myself, and Junebug has it spot-on: a broken toy. I look at other people and it is like everything is connected up right inside them, and I have faulty connections. Nothing I do feels normal, everything about me feels wrong, bad, and damaged. When I start...

I'm glad to hear you went to the session and were able to share so much. It was a brave thing, and a real gift to yourself to get the ball rolling.

Welcome to the forum. I relate to what you wrote, because my brother abused me and threatened me with a knife, too. I suffer with all the problems you describe, too. You are not alone.

I wouldn't dismiss him out of hand, but I would tell him that you found the comment dismissive and see how he responds. My therapist and I work with that very phrase often, but we've looked at the trauma in depth and built up a lot of trust, and recognizing that thoughts are not necessarily...

It sounds like you have learned to manage many of the symptoms of the PTSD but are struggling to resolve the traumas themselves. Wherever you get your treatment, whether it is rape counseling or trauma therapy, it will likely focus on helping you process the terrible things that happened...

Welcome to the forum. A lot of people with complex PTSD have gotten other diagnoses, including bipolar and Borderline. So you are not alone in the confusing world of psychiatric labels! It sucks that the neurologist dismissed you. I hope you will get a second opinion. Are you still in...

The way to stop avoiding is to stop avoiding! But I think the key is to move slowly and in small bits. We shift to defenses to avoid things very quickly and subtly, so much that we often aren't aware that we are doing it. My therapist had me notice when I was avoiding (dissociating, changing the...

Many people, when they first come here or are first diagnosed with PTSD, protest that what they experienced wasn't "bad enough" to be considered a trauma. But anything that completely overwhelms our ability to cope and causes us to feel terror is a trauma. It varies from person to person, and...

I think what you are describing is a form of intrusive thought. You are worried about becoming an abuser, afraid of it, without having any of the thoughts or actions that would be associated with it actually happening. The trauma has caused you to be terrified of wielding that power over someone...

What you are experiencing is a common feature of PTSD, especially when the trauma was childhood abuse. Many of us struggle with it; it can be quite unnerving. It can also be very soothing, as it is a defense against facing the pain of the trauma. If you search the forum for "dissociation"...

This has been my experience as well. I had a lot of side effects the first two weeks of my antidepressant, and they all faded between the 2nd and 4th week. Your body is getting used to a new medication, and it will take some time to settle down.

Hi, and welcome. I am sorry you are struggling with this. The flatness can be, at times, unbearable. I really relate to your struggles on that front. The painful numbness is what propelled me into therapy and it has gotten much better since then. This is a hard road and like Amethist says, the...

I hope you're feeling better soon. I fall into the same trap you do--feeling bad the day after a nightmare, and then blaming myself for having the nightmare in the first place. It's important to recognize that having a nightmare is not a personal failure. It doesn't mean you are weak or unable...

You've been through a lot and it's wonderful you've got a good treatment program going now. It sounds like the future is considerably brighter for you! I understand what you mean about the people around you staying the same and bringing you down. At a certain point in my recovery I had to...

It takes time to learn ways to calm down and manage symptoms. Take it easy on yourself.

Hi, welcome to the forum. I am sorry you are struggling and have had such trouble with mental health treatment in the past. That must be discouraging. Self-diagnosis is a tricky thing, however, because many of the elements of PTSD are also reflected in other mental health disorders. This is why...

Hi, and welcome to the forum. I am sorry to hear PTSD is wreaking havoc in your life right now, professionally and personally. There is a lot of good support and information here, so search around the forums and you will find lots of people having the same struggles as you are. There's plenty of...

Hi, welcome to the forum. I hope that you will be able to revisit the forum with new eyes to see that it is quite a helpful and welcoming place. Many of the questions you posted in your original post have been (and continue to be) explored at length in discussions. I encourage you to use the...

I understand that, Pandora. Sometimes the dissociation really is a gift, and if it gets you through a stressful time, there's nothing wrong with it. I hope everything comes out okay or you.

I think we all expect that once we tell, we will feel instantly better; unfortunately it doesn't seem to work that way. One reason telling your story can help you feel better is that it creates a cohesive narrative (a story, so to speak) out of disjointed, terrifying memories. So it doesn't...