Supporter 20 Years Of Love Gone In Half An Hour.

[Srain]

Welcome to the Forum,

It can be extremely shocking to go through something like you have and when do our bodies react, like yours losing weight, I've experienced myself it off and on and it can severe at times. The best thing you can do is keep your dr's appts and remember your children are looking to you to show them how to handle this traumatic situation, how to get through it all. As hard as it is on you it's even rougher on them. You don't have to perfect at it just show them that you don't give up.

Please take time out and read through all the rules and get yourself familiar with this site, it makes it less intimidating. I have found that asking questions is helpful as well, though I have had my share of stumbles so don't feel alone in that :).

Keep posting and take good care of yourself, it's a step at a time.

peace,
Rain

 

[kimberley dawn]

A terrible ordeal to go through and to have to take care of and give strength to kids on top of it all! But your hurt can in a way help the children. I'm thinking of the crying part. Hardly any kids get to see their parents cry and I've been told they think parents know it all and never get sorry or hurt.

Your kids can see you hurt and hopefully see you working your way back up. For them and for yourself. And for your wife if or when she gets a grip on what happened to her.

In some way I can relate to what she done. Sounds terrible but... When things are going good, all is well and someone comes along and pours some poison into my life...... That is when I just can not believe in the good! I have to get ridd of it / them / him. Before I get hurt again. And if there's a poison-person there to back me up on my attack to potential disaster ( the good folks..) my fantasy has no limit to what they've done or are going to do.

Hate is easy. Flight is easy. Blaming others is easy. Stepping on others is also easy. Denial is safe.
It's the opposite that scares the shit outa me.

Take care now, you're what those kids need!!

 

[Ajf7849d]

You need to find someone to talk to. It doesn't matter how well you know the person, in fact, the less you know them the better. But just find an ear, and let it all loose. Who cares if they judge you, you need an outlet. Trust me, you can only hide things from a group of people for so long until you go completely insane. I've done it before, and I messed up my life pretty bad.

 

[Molly Anne]

When things are going good, all is well and someone comes along and pours some poison into my life...... That is when I just can not believe in the good! I have to get ridd of it / them / him. Before I get hurt again. And if there's a poison-person there to back me up on my attack to potential disaster ( the good folks..) my fantasy has no limit to what they've done or are going to do.

Hate is easy. Flight is easy. Blaming others is easy. Stepping on others is also easy. Denial is safe.
It's the opposite that scares the shit outa me.

Absolutely agree!! 98% sure this is why my sufferer left me... long story short, he was scared that everything was going right, and even more scared to lose it. He didn't say it in those words, but told me in round-about ways. He would talk about how amazing I was and he knew what he was giving up. He would talk about how if he hadn't gone through a loss with Destiny (a girl he was engaged to that left him by cheating on him), then we wouldn't be in the same position. Basically, it seemed that he was so afraid of falling deeply in love with me, because he might lose me... This was after a deployment, during which his grandfather died, his father moved and remarried, and his mother moved from his birthplace all while he was gone. It was like I was the only constant in his life, and suddenly he needed to get rid of me too... Change his world to pretend that everything was not upside-down, or a "get her before she gets me" mentality. I never would have left him, but I guess he couldn't be too sure after everything he had been through. Hopefully he'll come back, but I can't know that for sure... it's a deep, dark suffering for us both now... and I can totally relate to the post here and to kimberley dawn's response.

 

[ihatethewordsmyfriends]

I thank u all. Please keep posting it helps. I've been in bed with the depression hitting me hard. I didn't make the doctors I need to though. I had a visit today from some church people that go from house. Aparently they had spoke to my wife once before and asked if she was home. I found my self telling them my story crying my eyes out. Feel so week for doing it. I don't have much energy i think my body giving up. My next stop may be hospitle there is nothing to me anymore.I'd like to tell you all more but I just don't have the engery. Sorry.

 

[PTSD sufferer]

I am so glad you came back here and let us know how you are. Don't be ashamed about talking and telling your story. The only way to get help is to talk. You have been through so much and you are surviving and that takes strength. For what it is worth, I think you are a very strong person and a survivor. I know it is hard to get to the doctors at the moment, but please keep trying, you need your doctors' support. You are in my thoughts and when you are ready, I would really like to know how you are getting on.

 

[jostle]

What's the old saying - "once you hit rock bottom the only way left is up". Hope you find this to be true - I know I have at times and usually when I least expect it. Sometimes you have to hit total "ground zero" to get better.

 

[Molly Anne]

What's the old saying - "once you hit rock bottom the only way left is up". Hope you find this to be true - I know I have at times and usually when I least expect it. Sometimes you have to hit total "ground zero" to get better.

Absolutely true. There are some songs I listen to lately that I like a lot ... Addison Road "Hope Now" and Matthew West "Strong Enough." The first is about reaching rock bottom, because that's when you start looking up. The second is about having faith, relying on God.

You mentioned your church group - that's a good place to start. I teach at a faith-based school, and they were the first people I turned to in my time of crisis. People are often much more willing to support us than we realize. Another quote I enjoy is... "Trouble is part of your life: if you don't share it, you don't give the person who loves you a chance to love you enough." - Dinah Shore

Just remember that there are people who love you and are willing to support you.

 

[ihatethewordsmyfriends]

Sad and loney

 

[PTSD sufferer]

Hi there. Did you make it to the doctor or the hospital? How did it go?

 

[pi314159]

Sad and loney

You have the support of everyone here. You're not alone :)

 

[Molly Anne]

I'm sad tonight too... but we always have each other here!