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5 Things I'm Thinking Today

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 29920
  • Start date Start date
@Dear @Junebug I think you simply used your good common sense to not get into the car. And because he was friendly you were really wise because it is harder to say no I think.:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::woot::woot::woot::woot::woot:

@Heather I hope everything works out for you.:hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug::hug:
 
1. One of my old friends from childhood is a narcissist and I just stepped on his fragile centre by making my boundaries clear :wtf:
2. Oh well! :rolleyes:
3. I'm pigging out today :p:hungry:
4. I'm glad the sun is out
5. At least I feel a little better today....where's that bottle of joy...? Could use it all the time....:x3:
 
1. Couple of plans for later the day. Because being damned lost? Totally a reason to drown that in being someone else's company & music & noise.
2. Mistake. I'm supposed to hide how badly under-slept I am. :banghead: What would R.W. the shiny-party-star do with this. :wtf: f*ck surviving socialization on remembering who I was when there was teams of us for the same f*cking shit.
3. Too many words for fricking Stellar mood.
4. I need new shades.
5. Nightmares about details, missing the whole thing, are f*cking terrifying. Shake it off, wake up, there's normalcy to try. Or not.
 
Can I put the bike carrier on the hitch? Use to do it all the time, so time to do it again regularly and not drop it on my toe, or get a smaller carrier as I never haul four bikes any more.

New month and half the year is over. I always start with such high expectations and end up with such a sense of failure. Adjust expectation and actions so at least a measure of success is achieved.

Physical stuff is a lot easier to deal with than the mental emotional stuff.

Two days on my own with no responsibilities other than what I need/want....oh and of course what the dogs need. I know that swimming and fetch in the water will be at the top of their agenda. :D

Does an attitude of constantly focusing on the positive and gratitude really make a difference? Or is it just Polly Anna? Like to consider myself a realist but at time the reality is really dark and overwhelming.
 
.Yes @MariaY good decision indeed not to get in car with stranger (even if "friendly"):)
.How do those who abuse:devilish: their powers of authority ie. leasing agent who indiscriminately emotionally (psychologically) ruthlessly harms others and me live:oops: (since her hire-in date) with themselves? w/ seemingly no conviction (guilt/remorse?):hungover: whatsoever on any level?:(
.How to fill 3 days with meaningful and "normal" (living in the present moment) activity vs. isolating myself over 4th of July hollow days (isolating is not good planning for me, no):meh:
.Why did I this week tell primary Army doc during appt. for same that I like thyroid medicine high like this? WT? When I know it's too d**** high!?! Wacko:O_o: thinking yes!
.With 4th of July hollow day/celebration looming I'm already thinking thus feeling anxious about the upcoming (foreseeable distance) major hollow days! WT?
(stop it!)
Stop obsessing on above negative thoughts primarily due to leasing agent's rant on phone at me (over 1st email) on Wednesday (then obsessing about possible repercussions over subsequent email sent to her (her bosses); and come back to self and all that positivity I was trying to cultivate prior to leasing agent stuff:banghead:? Okay!:headphone:
 
a ptsd act would have been to get into the car

Never thought of it that way @MariaY but yes indeed! I'm more likely to presume it's a ptsd-over-reaction, or not really be sure, at all. Oddly, if it's someone I was certain was 'safe' I'd definitely say no I'm ok thanks. The 1st reaction was 'what did I do wrong?' :eek: The only 'strange' part was it was a nice day, early, I wasn't pacing or anything (I don't think?)

Yes I absolutely adored living in 'Little Italy'- would always give free cheese, meats, insist on milk-on-a-tab, shoveling!, - physical help without asking (maybe in this case too?), old guys would play Bochi (sp?) ball all night, a young guy sad saxophone music til 3 a.m. but it was soothing! :)

Thank you, and @JadesJewel @C j @ladee @Rain :hug: :hug: :hug:

Nightmares about details, missing the whole thing, are f*cking terrifying

Wow never heard someone have this- me too- yes they 'feel' terrifying. @Ronin :hug:

Physical stuff is a lot easier to deal with than the mental emotional stuff.

So true @intothelight , xoxox :hug:

Hugs to all above and @Anrish @Heather @CrowFeather and all xox :hug: :hug::hug:
 
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1. Just when I thought the day can't get /weirder/.
2. Sorry, Mr. Messenger. I don't have an answer for that one. I haven't had it for half a year and I won't have it.
3. Sleep fixes everything.
4. Her Eyes.
5. The simplest things that are not falling apart. Cuppa coffee. Dear someone else, don't guilt trip me about that coffee, however well meant. It's not a cup of coffee & IDGAF about the price. It's my reason to hang on till f*cking tomorrow. It's my reason to give myself one more f*cking day. Things non-PTSD people won't f*cking understand. So just let me live.
6. That-others-may-live. They bunch weren't giving me that life back for f*cking /nothing/ god damn it. Let's believe I wasn't just work.
7. Arrow needa cosplay HappyOliverQueen, except sorry Canary, that guy died in Purgatory & never made it out.
(Ronin & S.T. Love Story. Enjoy that ShitCountry in South America, I'll keep the country you got out of for both of us.)
 
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Sunny and fresh weather. Good.
Just awaked. At 13:00 pm, like the all week. Brunch, then :D
Food is done, so I haven't got to do anything :cool:
The all day in front with no interaction with «real people» seems now a superb plan for Sunday
Random thoughts are flying on my head, trying to gasp my attention so I can start to worry about «something» No matter what. Nope :headphone:
 

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