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Nicolette
Supporter Admin
In a month from today Anthony and I met 5 years ago. While I was overseas his marriage broke down and I made a $70 phone call to end my relationship as my boyfriend couldn't even find the time to email or even send me a text.
We were two people both having had enough of the opposite sex; Anthony vowing not to date a woman for at least a year after just ending a marriage & me having dumped a man I was dating thinking I am so over this I'm better off alone.
Our sons brought us together as they played cricket together and believe it or not Anthony had moved into the house next door to mine some months before but we had never met. I just knew my son played cricket with the boy next door.
It turns out our sons birthdays were a week apart and Anthony introduced himself just before his son's birthday and said I was welcome to come over if I wanted. I had since met a new guy who was chasing me but I decided I couldn't be bothered going out the night of Anthony's son's birthday so stayed at home to do the ironing. I told the guy who was interested I was doing the ironing despite his persistence to even come and help me. Anthony had said drop in if I wanted to and again I just couldn't be bothered. He only invited me in a neighbourly fashion and I believe it was more just for adult company amongst a group of teenagers.
At 9pm I finished the ironing and decided to go next door to give my son the key to the house as I didn't want our home unlocked while a bunch of teenagers were running around outside and was ready for bed.
I started talking to Anthony and we just talked and talked. At around 3am I dropped a teenage girl off home to save her some dignity and went back, helped tidy up and went home.
The next morning I saw Anthony and he told me he didn't work and I was off to work on a Sunday. I jokingly said "well you can cook me dinner then" to which he said "yes" and from that moment on we spent every day together. 5 days later we decided to start dating but to leave 'sex' out of it as it always changed everything.
We talked and talked; having similar values, thoughts, views on life due to experience and were just comfortable. We ended up calling the uncanny connection 'Heinz' (baked beans - good, nutritious food) and then changed it to 'Fruit Loops' (colourful sweet cereal) when we both blurted out the same thing.:inlove:
Within a few weeks Anthony gave me a print out about PTSD from this website. I read it, hadn't seen anything really strange with him other than he had a weird sleep pattern (up most of the night) and didn't think much of it. Wow did I regret not researching it but then again if I had maybe I wouldn't be here today if I did?
Once the issues started with his ex-wife I saw a man who was reduced to a sweat in bed for days unable to function other than to go to the bathroom. I used to sit there with a cold face washer and try to cool him down. I then saw what I learned to know as escapism with video games. The isolation wasn't so noticeable as I was at work during the day and I didn't really understand what was going on.
Wow, did I learn some lesson and see things which broke my heart - especially when I watched someone pull strings to make every PTSD symptom worse. I stood by Anthony and I weathered the storm. I don't know... he just had a big kind heart with lots of love for me (which is all I wanted) and I think I just held on. It was like driving in the dark with no lights.
About 4- 5 months into the relationship I was introduced to this forum - at times being one of many desperate Supporters wanting someone just to listen to me and understand (and I could only do it in the private section which was pretty stagnant). Bless the members of this forum at this time, especially Kathy, Evie and Marlene who taught me lots.
To be continued...... (it's bed time :sleep:)
We were two people both having had enough of the opposite sex; Anthony vowing not to date a woman for at least a year after just ending a marriage & me having dumped a man I was dating thinking I am so over this I'm better off alone.
Our sons brought us together as they played cricket together and believe it or not Anthony had moved into the house next door to mine some months before but we had never met. I just knew my son played cricket with the boy next door.
It turns out our sons birthdays were a week apart and Anthony introduced himself just before his son's birthday and said I was welcome to come over if I wanted. I had since met a new guy who was chasing me but I decided I couldn't be bothered going out the night of Anthony's son's birthday so stayed at home to do the ironing. I told the guy who was interested I was doing the ironing despite his persistence to even come and help me. Anthony had said drop in if I wanted to and again I just couldn't be bothered. He only invited me in a neighbourly fashion and I believe it was more just for adult company amongst a group of teenagers.
At 9pm I finished the ironing and decided to go next door to give my son the key to the house as I didn't want our home unlocked while a bunch of teenagers were running around outside and was ready for bed.
I started talking to Anthony and we just talked and talked. At around 3am I dropped a teenage girl off home to save her some dignity and went back, helped tidy up and went home.
The next morning I saw Anthony and he told me he didn't work and I was off to work on a Sunday. I jokingly said "well you can cook me dinner then" to which he said "yes" and from that moment on we spent every day together. 5 days later we decided to start dating but to leave 'sex' out of it as it always changed everything.
We talked and talked; having similar values, thoughts, views on life due to experience and were just comfortable. We ended up calling the uncanny connection 'Heinz' (baked beans - good, nutritious food) and then changed it to 'Fruit Loops' (colourful sweet cereal) when we both blurted out the same thing.:inlove:
Within a few weeks Anthony gave me a print out about PTSD from this website. I read it, hadn't seen anything really strange with him other than he had a weird sleep pattern (up most of the night) and didn't think much of it. Wow did I regret not researching it but then again if I had maybe I wouldn't be here today if I did?
Once the issues started with his ex-wife I saw a man who was reduced to a sweat in bed for days unable to function other than to go to the bathroom. I used to sit there with a cold face washer and try to cool him down. I then saw what I learned to know as escapism with video games. The isolation wasn't so noticeable as I was at work during the day and I didn't really understand what was going on.
Wow, did I learn some lesson and see things which broke my heart - especially when I watched someone pull strings to make every PTSD symptom worse. I stood by Anthony and I weathered the storm. I don't know... he just had a big kind heart with lots of love for me (which is all I wanted) and I think I just held on. It was like driving in the dark with no lights.
About 4- 5 months into the relationship I was introduced to this forum - at times being one of many desperate Supporters wanting someone just to listen to me and understand (and I could only do it in the private section which was pretty stagnant). Bless the members of this forum at this time, especially Kathy, Evie and Marlene who taught me lots.
To be continued...... (it's bed time :sleep:)
