A few random therapy questions

[Crow]

1. T is not on social media but we do email about non-therapuetic stuff.

2. Not for the first 12 years or so but then she was planning on leaving the state and gave me her old chair she had used for years and I gave her a pendant that she still wears sometimes. She ended up not moving.

3. Small, bright room in her home. Two chairs, a small table, bookshelf, and a couch. Lots of plants and windows and cool art. A few stuffed animals and percussion instruments.

4. YES! Took me 15 years to ask if it was okay. I've sat in the floor by myself about three times and one time we were doing a body exercise and T was in the floor with me.

 

[agirls]

1. No. Facebook kept suggesting her as a friend so I blocked that. It was awkward. I do belong to a FB group she created about MIndfulness. She invited everyone who took the class. (She teaches it).

2. Yes, I gave her some candy I had made the first Christmas I was seeing her. Occasionally I will bring her a tea or something. But that's really rare.

3. Her office has a loveseat sized couch with a bunch of pillows, two chairs facing thr couch(she sits in one of them) with a small table between the chairs, a long narrow table against one wall, some plants, a lot of toys (she works with a lot of kids) a couple of windows. It's painted a warm dark orange. There is one painting on the wall that I can remember.

4. I'm not sure. I feel like I may have sat on the floor but I don't know. She certainly wouldn't care if I did.

 

[a.very.hungry.beast]

1. No to both my current therapists. I did have a former therapist with a social media page that clients could follow. One of my current therapists I'd probably prefer to be in touch with if we ended therapy, but I don't believe that is allowed until you wait several years.

2. Yes I have given one of my therapists a traditional and cultural gift on the holidays, and I've sent my payments in cards with a thank you note before. I've given and traded art work with my other therapist as well.

3. One has a very medical office, absolutely nothing personal. Another has an office in a suite of therapists, and it's very eclectic, art, mish mash of furniture etc. I have found both welcoming even though the environment is different.

4. One therapist and I sat on the floor for a cultural storytelling (tradition).

 

[BigBirdsSister]

No, I'm wouldn't be comfortable with mine seeing my fb. We have a mutual friend, which is how I spotted her fb. So I blocked her for both our privacy sake! lol

I would like to give her a knitted animal I made on our last session, but that is a very long time away and only if I am comfortable

White walls, nice glass coffee table with some ornament, and two comfy chairs lol:)

I sit on the floor when I need a lighter session for reestablishing a sense of safetly but I try not to because on the floor she doesn't seem physically comfortable.

 

[NightSky]

1- no but due to mutual friends I see posts sometimes.
2- I mailed her a card once when her friend died and made her Christmas cookies once. She has given me several things to have as reminders of topics we touch on. Small items.
3- big futon with pillows I sit on- a chair she sits on and a coffee table between us with fidgety stuff to play with. A desk and bookshelves and subtle/tasteful decor.
4- No. But I'm so interested by this. I'm curious about how this helps and how it gets started. Do you just ask if you can?
I'm so frozen in session I barely move. I can't fathom sifting somewhere else.

 

[erigby]

Thanks for sharing!
It is fun to read the answers.
1. No...he is not on Facebook, though his daughter is and she and I were friends before so I will sometimes see a picture of him with her and the grandkids. It's not weird...but again because I knew him in a different capacity before I started to see him as a therapist.
2. Yes...socks and eggs. I have chickens and they lay a lot of eggs so I bring him about a dozen every two weeks. I bought him socks because I stare at his feet a lot and his socks were incredibly boring. He was very professional in the way he received/receives these gestures of gratitude. I have never written him a note or given him a card.
3. Part of a center so there are other therapists and psychiatrists in the building. Warm tones, minimal decor, lots of books (which I like), an old couch that I sit on, two old chairs, a couple of lamps, pictures of his kids and grandkids, cartoons and things clients have made for him or given him. There is a nice window and door that look out into a wooded area behind the office building. I look out the window a lot during our time together.
4. Have not sat on floor...though have thought about it on multiple occasions.

 

[DharmaGirl]

No, I wouldn't want to friend him because the end retraumatized me badly, so I try to stay away from any triggers.

I gave him produce from my garden, since my garden was so abundant. I gave him a going away card and gift when he left the practice.

His office was full of interesting, amusing things, with a large window that had one way glass so people couldn't see in, but you could see landscapers picking their noses sometimes, he had a painting I liked, then switched it out for crappy ones. He had an office chair in front of his desk, a comfy chair that I couldn't sit in because of my back, and a regular chair.

If I got on the floor, I wouldn't be able to get up. My dog was on the floor.

 

[Deleted member 42665]

No, I wouldn't want to friend him because the end retraumatized me badly, so I try to stay away from...

omg the re-tramatuized part. terrifying. i have a massive fear of that happening, some times i feel i just should quit now and avoid the end

 

[UnicornSightings]

omg the re-tramatuized part. terrifying. i have a massive fear of that happening, some times i feel...

Lol if you quit NOW it's the end. There's no avoiding the end. I have FREAKED out at the thought so you're not alone. I think it will be good, though. Sad as hell but you're trading your therapist's support for your OWN and that's incredibly empowering. And mine has made it clear she would be available should I ever need her again. I do joke about seeing her for forever but I don't think I'm too far from the end now. We are covering the hardest stuff now.

 

[Deleted member 42783]

1. No. He would never allow it. I have glanced at his FB page a couple times. I'm sure that will come back to bite me in the ass.
2. Another thing that he won't allow. I once brought him a dozen eggs from my chickens and he gave me a look of horror and had me snuggle them back out so that no one would see. Geeze, I thought that was a pretty innocent gift.

3. He shares a couple offices in a big agency. None of the décor is his. It's all old lady crap.

4. I would actually like to do this sometime but again, he would be weirded out by it. He is the young "professional" trying to keep boundaries. I am the middle aged mom who doesn't really care about appropriateness anymore. We are the odd couple.

 

[WishfulThinking123]

1-- Has anyone been social media "Friends' with their therapist or keep in touch when therapy ended?

No as to social media, yes as to keep in touch/relationship changed due to us going to the same Church but, now I'm back in T (complicated relationship lol...)

2-- Do you give them gifts ever or they you? (Cards included)
Umm-do Christmas Cards count? She usually gives me one

3-- What does their office look like?

It's nice and blue with a couch and she sits in a chair and then she has a desk near the back.

4-- Have you ever sat on the floor in session?
Nope but I haven't asked either?

 

[chaotic harmony]

1.) My first two (female) both stalked my Instagram, Twitter & Snapchat (I don't have FB). I say stalked because they did it without my permission. My 2nd also stalked my family. :bored: My T now, a male, has looked at my IG but only when I'm in the room. I can see us being in touch after our journey together has ended. Not friends, but friendly. :)

2.) Not yet, but he loves my artwork and always comments on how he would love to frame it all, so I am working on a piece for him. He knows very well that art is important in our relationship (I draw my trauma), so I know he'll love it. I also make homemade cards.

3.) His office is rather boring (so he needs that art!). Another person uses it two days a week so he doesn't have anything personal in there. It's just a desk, 3 chairs (his & two for clients), an end table (there is no room for a regular table...this space is tiny), and a waist-high bookshelf type thing that has one plant on top of it and one book (DSM-V) on it. I laugh at that lonely book.

4.) A few times with my first T, we would do arts & crafts on the floor. Never with my second or current. I have a messed up back so it would hurt too much. We do go for walks though and that's better than the floor for me. :happy: