DID Accepting a dissociative disorder

Digz

MyPTSD Pro
I think DID is such a hard diagnosis to come to terms with. For the most part I have accepted my diagnosis but even now ten years on there are times when I want to pretend it doesn't exist.

It's a slow process, accepting it. Be kind to yourself. If you are recognising it at all and trying to address it at all, you are doing well. I used to believe I could've made it up and worry, I think it's quite natural. Eventually you will see it's not possible to make such a thing up.
I sometimes get my T to email key things said in session, things I need to remember to try or just need to work on remembering in general. This helps me, don't know if it's worth a try.

I guess one of the biggest things that helped me was working towards accepting the parts one at a time and opening a dialogue up with them in some way. Understanding and reminding myself that this isn't crazy although it feels it sometimes, that it is a natural protective mechanism also helps me sometimes.

I think DID is extra tricky because although trauma is becoming increasingly recognised in society and more people understand and are okay with it, DID is not at all from my experience which can make one be more afraid, isolated and reluctant to accept the diagnosis.

But you are on your way. You will forget, you will go backwards and forwards, progress in this I don't think is linear but remember to congratulate yourself for the bravery required to address it at all and turn up to therapy. It all requires great strength, so you should be proud of that.
 

Justmehere

Moderator
For me, I see it like having allergies. I can't always stop the allergic reaction, but knowing I have the allergy helps me better manage it. It's simply a working tool to feel better. The same applies for mental health conditions. I simply have a cluster of symptoms I need to manage to feel better.

Acceptance is easier when I focus on usefulness of any label. Not the se judgement of the label.

Dissociation is a trauma survival super power. Same with the other responses of fight, flight or fawn. Freeze (or dissociation) is another way to survive. It was a way to cope the unbearable. It's clever, smart, got you through difficult trauma. It a super power / coping mechanism that is now backfiring. It's simply stuck on and not quite healed up yet. Nothing to be ashamed about, simply to learn about how to manage. Sounds like you have an awesome therapist to help sort it all out and support you to live more of the life you want to live.
 

AnD

MyPTSD Pro
I was about to start a thread about this and found yours.

I haven't a diagnosis but parts take over and I dissociate(hanging out with parts) several hours a day. Still I talk to myself in the same way like you do, I make it up etc.

How do I break out of the denial?
 

whiteraven

MyPTSD Pro
I was about to start a thread about this and found yours.

I haven't a diagnosis but parts take over and I dissociate(hanging out with parts) several hours a day. Still I talk to myself in the same way like you do, I make it up etc.

How do I break out of the denial?
You know, I've been thinking about this a lot since reading your question. I honestly think it takes time, validation of your experience by another - preferably a therapist who understands -, and a lot of work learning about your various parts and starting to communicate with them. Are you working with a therapist?

Truthfully? It took me years to stop denying.

Another thing - you might want to ask yourself *why* you continue to deny it. What does being DID - or having parts - mean to you?
 

brat17

MyPTSD Pro
Woodsforthetree-I could have wrote your post almost word for word. You articulated it better than I may have.
I do not have DID, have a masters, depression and anxiety, and dissociate. I find myself dissociating a lot. My husband will even wave at me from across the room. (I must appear in no where land) Its heavy, my head feels full. I am not high functioning anymore though. I think my age has just made me tired. Years do wear on one with these things.
 
Top