Accepting The Reality I'll Never Experience Love

[The Albatross]

Bravado, are you familiar with the "spoons" analogy of which Eve speaks? It is to a degree valid, but it falls flat when trying to actualize a life. Prioritizing and choosing, and taking reasonable risks is part of actualizing a life... defensive living, well, I expect you've had plenty of experience with it already... the spoon analogy was initially intended to explain chronic disease, but it is applicable to PTSD as well as other mental debilities. You though are not constrained to a certain life because of your perceived deficits. I've myth busted in another peer support forum and people who've known me for 9 or 10 years can't even fathom where I'm at now. This forum has only known me for a little more than 5. Sounds like a long time right? But if you're looking at a long range view and the intent... well is it really not worth it?

The Spoon Theory by Christine Miserandino (link http://www.butyoudontlooksick.com/articles/written-by-christine/the-spoon-theory/)

Though I would tell you that quite frankly, even for PTSD's physical chronic or acute physical ailments trump much of PTSD... it get's pushed to the back burner. PTSD, in my own personal estimation is an overactive survival instinct. Food for thought... it was for me, at least. For that reason I think I would probably self examine your thoughts/beliefs about your disability. Because in addition to child abuse a lot of stuff probably stems from there?

With this too, I have said much and unless responded to will also withdraw. For now.

 

[Bragado Jansing]

Wow, I have no idea what happened to me last night. I've been making a lot of progress forward in my life, and was pretty excited for the future. And since it was Memorial Day in the US I decided to celebrate by drinking 2 beers ... not even strong beer, PBRs.

I then I had an emotional breakdown. I didn't think two drinks would do this to me, but it did. I think I might have to completely abstain from alcohol while I work through this. Thanks again for everyone reaching out to me last night.