Arty-Pelican
New Here
So I came to this site by accident today, no actually it was yesterday seeing its nearly 3 am. Anyhow I came here looking for info after my T' sent me this: There are a few ways of working with the feelings. One to see it as part of you who is trying to protect you. It’s not there to game you, rather it wants to remind you to be safe. Don’t try to hide or avoid this part as it will become stronger. Holding your hand over the spot on the stomach and feeling it being supported. Thank it for trying to protect you and let it know you believe it and know that even though the memory is lost, it is still important. It makes sense!
Make sure you control your breathing, in your nose and longer exhale out your mouth as you hold the part.
Read internal family systems, self compassion and sensory motor therapy.
Please don’t push yourself, the discovery is hard enough. Thank you for telling me what is really going on.
Take care and talk soon,
I got that after sending an email after I had this freak thing happen. I've been depressed and anxious for a while. Getting burnt out as a socialworker and then sacked, Then becoming the focus of a Narcissist, who broke my brain/mind/spirit/body will do that. brought up all my child hood issues , well not all, I'll get to that. So for first 3 years I reclused, slept, switched off. Then got told, have to work at getting back to work, so now doing an art therapy course. Now if you want to start remembering stuff you didn't even know was there to be remembered. start doing an art therapy course, preferably one where they don't know what there doing, and wait for the ride. So I've been exploring my unconscious, and its not a pleasant place. Pandora's box has been opened and someones f*cked off with the lid.
So Yesterday, had put in a long day with coursework, was stressing about money and stuff , and then CRASH!!! panic attack, and then I start getting these physical feelings, BREATH I was being touched,BREATH I was petrified, BREATH I felt like I was a scared lost little girl. BREATH, There's a painful pent up knot of fear in the pit of my stomach Breath breath b r e a t h. After a while, after doing my breathing, I calmed down enough to think what the hell was that! I've never felt that before, I try to remember being a little girl, Well that was stupid, I don't have memories from when I was little, I knew that. I thought it was from disassociating when I went through a really bad time as a 10-12 yrold, that I'd managed to lose more memories than what I thought. But that would have been too easy, and nothings ever that easy for me. Then I'm thinking thinking, I grew up catholic, went to catholic schools, in a town where the Royal Commission set up office for a year, cos a certain type of priest was attracted to the place. My older brother would have had a lot to say to the commission if he was still alive. I don't know who, why or how. I just know I was about 7 ish, and somebody has put their filthy hands on me, I feel what happened. I'm scared, confused and disgusted. I contacted the crisis service, they said from what I was describing, they thought I was right, they said "the body remembers" even if the minds not ready to yet. I got hold of my T' I said I need you to tell me how to make it go away again, Her response was well, I already said. So today, is the first day of my journey CSA. f*ck THIS SHIT!!!!
Make sure you control your breathing, in your nose and longer exhale out your mouth as you hold the part.
Read internal family systems, self compassion and sensory motor therapy.
Please don’t push yourself, the discovery is hard enough. Thank you for telling me what is really going on.
Take care and talk soon,
I got that after sending an email after I had this freak thing happen. I've been depressed and anxious for a while. Getting burnt out as a socialworker and then sacked, Then becoming the focus of a Narcissist, who broke my brain/mind/spirit/body will do that. brought up all my child hood issues , well not all, I'll get to that. So for first 3 years I reclused, slept, switched off. Then got told, have to work at getting back to work, so now doing an art therapy course. Now if you want to start remembering stuff you didn't even know was there to be remembered. start doing an art therapy course, preferably one where they don't know what there doing, and wait for the ride. So I've been exploring my unconscious, and its not a pleasant place. Pandora's box has been opened and someones f*cked off with the lid.
So Yesterday, had put in a long day with coursework, was stressing about money and stuff , and then CRASH!!! panic attack, and then I start getting these physical feelings, BREATH I was being touched,BREATH I was petrified, BREATH I felt like I was a scared lost little girl. BREATH, There's a painful pent up knot of fear in the pit of my stomach Breath breath b r e a t h. After a while, after doing my breathing, I calmed down enough to think what the hell was that! I've never felt that before, I try to remember being a little girl, Well that was stupid, I don't have memories from when I was little, I knew that. I thought it was from disassociating when I went through a really bad time as a 10-12 yrold, that I'd managed to lose more memories than what I thought. But that would have been too easy, and nothings ever that easy for me. Then I'm thinking thinking, I grew up catholic, went to catholic schools, in a town where the Royal Commission set up office for a year, cos a certain type of priest was attracted to the place. My older brother would have had a lot to say to the commission if he was still alive. I don't know who, why or how. I just know I was about 7 ish, and somebody has put their filthy hands on me, I feel what happened. I'm scared, confused and disgusted. I contacted the crisis service, they said from what I was describing, they thought I was right, they said "the body remembers" even if the minds not ready to yet. I got hold of my T' I said I need you to tell me how to make it go away again, Her response was well, I already said. So today, is the first day of my journey CSA. f*ck THIS SHIT!!!!
