Alternative Dictionary Of Therapy (humor)

[UnKnown-Self]

Apathy - Nothing's wrong, leave me alone.

Depression - I just want to be alone. Stays home.

Isolation - Refuses to answer door or phone because I want to be alone

Anxiety - Shaking and crying, "Why won't you leave me alone?"

Anger Outbursts - What does it take to get you to leave me alone!? Slams door in their face.

Violent Tendencies - Punching them in the face. "Now will you leave me alone?"

 

[Ronin]

:tup::giggle: @Alice.in.Wonderland. That guide made sense.

 

[UnKnown-Self]

@Cashew

It's a slippery slope my friend.

 

[Ellabella44]

depression - a mental state that tells you that you are dead inside.

anxiety - A "wonderful" state of mind that reminds depression you still have a pulse.

 

[Ronin]

Or a variant: Depression - a state reminding you you should be dead.

Anxiety - a state reminding you you will be dead if you don't move your ass about it.

Liars I don't play poker with, because they bullshit real good, and close up.
Also see: Hazarding with own life isn't a recommended reading of this game theory.

 

[Anarchy]

Self Harm:
a voucher for ten minutes extra on a therapy session for free
- only valid if you mention it or display the scabs and scars just before you get shoved out of the door.

 

[Ronin]

Psychiatrist

A reminder you need a new boxing bag, for free.

 

[Deleted member 12723]

I used to be apathetic, but now I just do not care anymore.:oops:

 

[Anarchy]

Subjective units of distress

multiplied by a $ constant - this is how a T arrives at the fees they charge you

 

[Ronin]

SUDS - Differing modified scales are what you feel like when you hear the amount of $ to pay.

Just peachy.

 

[Recovery4Me]

Autogenic Training

Origins accredited to Europe for deep relaxation technique ushered in with warm imagines. Release of emotions are still being quantified to see if fuzzy & safe can equate the release and/or discharge of several hours worth of target practice- thus a warm gun for many Americans. To be updated after hunting season and Kegger Parties.

 

[Deleted member 29920]

Untreatable - when your therapist is totally incompetent and passes the buck