Poll Anybody Else Have a Problem with Drugs or Alcohol?

[patrick]

Almost everything I read discusses how common it is for people with PTSD to abuse drugs and alcohol. I know I kept my demons at bay for about forty years, and it wasn't until I got sober that I was willing to consider the possibility that I even had PTSD. Now, I am tempted to go back to alcohol almost every time it gets hard for me, but I know if I do that I won't have much chance of recovering from the PTSD.

Just wondering if anybody else has a problem with drugs and/or alcohol.

 

[A-RON]

I've been craving a rich, creamy, fat cigar for the past week, and my craving got worse last night. If the smoke shop hadn't closed early, I probably would've had one last night. I'm still craving it. I've also been thinking a lot about marijuana, but I wouldn't say I'm craving it. I've been smoke-free for six months or so. Okay, maybe four months. Well, with the exception of a cigar that I had on the coast while drinking scotch and watching the sunset.

I've never considered myself a problem drinker, but since living in a van, I definitely feel self-conscious about pouring a glass of something hard before going to bed. It's especially awkward because for the first time in my life, I can empathize with homeless people that drink. I've actually noticed that I stay warmer at night if I've had something to drink, and it seems like a valid reason if you don't think too hard on it.

I've also thought about the habit. Someone noticed a few weeks ago that I smelled like alcohol. They mentioned it to me, and I was incredibly embarrassed. I hadn't drank anything since the night before. Admittedly, I hadn't taken a shower that morning, but I think they were smelling it through my skin, not my breath. I only had two shots worth, but it made me wreak of alcohol.

But I think I'm afraid of losing control. I think I have an addictive personality (actually I know I do). I've literally only drank two bottles in the last four months, one of bourbon, one of scotch, so I really don't think I have a problem. I also don't think I've ever had an alcohol problem in the past.

And I've thankfully never done any hard drugs. I can't even imagine how addicting it would be to have crack or heroin in your body. In my mind, people that kick addictions have superhuman powers, and I have great admiration for them. For me, I've only been able to quit addictions due to getting sick and/or moving out of the area, so I consider it all luck for me.

I think I might be developing some bad habits, though, and I could really use a good cigar right now. But I'm not going to. I'm a non-smoker.

 

[patrick]

Good for you Aaron. I still haven't been able to quit smoking, even though I have moderate lung disease. I think smoking is the hardest addiction of all, and I've had most of them at one time or another during my life.

 

[morgan]

I am strongly addicted to drugs and alcohol to the point where they nearly killed me. I am clean and sober nearly 4mos today and I am working a decent program. My sponsor wants me to be thorough so I work very hard at it. Sobriety and ptsd are my main two priorities right now. They come before anything else and it is working miracles in my life.

 

[cragger65]

I was a very heavy drinker, ya, I guess I'd admit, alcoholic since my early 20's. If it hadn't been for breaking my neck AND a nervous breakdown AND having wicked reactions between my meds and the liquor, I'd still be drinking. I could consume ridiculous amounts (26er + 16 beers + 2 or 3 bottles of wine, and people took me as "the only sober person at the party).

I've been sober for about 4 1/2 years now. Did it on my own. I wouldn't recommend doing it solo, though, it's a tough go. Now I can actually say that I enjoy "a beer" now and again, and it means just that - one. Some can't do that without back sliding, I don't seem to have any trouble.

Did drugs in my teens and 20's, acid, shrooms, pills, payote... tried coke a couple of times at parties but (thankfully) didn't care for it. The only one I would ever consider trying again is mushrooms. They are 100% natural, and therefor I consider them one of God's little gifts, to be handled wisely.

I know it's hard right now Pat, I can really relate, but there is solid land again on the far side of that swamp, trust me. Is AA helping at all?

PS. As far as smoking, I am "hooked through the bag". Sorry, no other saying does it justice.

 

[midi]

The poll needs to include a question about poly drug users and how long they've been using and if they're dry/clean now. I started popping pills when I was 7 and drinking when I was 9. Finally dealt with those issues and it'll be 3 years this summer. The occasional half pint or toke is my limit now.

 

[patrick]

What are poly drugs? I've never heard that term before.

The poll needs to include a question about poly drug users and how long they've been using and if they're dry/clean now.

 

[midi]

Oh, sorry. Poly drug users are people who abuse more than one thing. We like to mix it up.

 

[fin]

and script meds? (maybe for the poll), although regardless of whether prescribed or not, to me drugs is drugs so....

and am not talking about meds that are monitored here...something different altogether

i.e benzodiazapines....that were prescribed but then you just cant do without...addictive.(dont think that was spelt right sorry)...

and is peyote mescaline?

 

[patrick]

Thanks Midi. This is such a big topic, with so many different facets. I've had periods in my life where I definitely liked to "mix it up", but eventually got to the point where the easiest thing to get, and the most dependable, was alcohol. Good to hear you have it under control.

I guess when I posed the question I was including prescription meds in my mind, but didn't state if specifically in the pole. I wonder if there is any way to change the poll question once they have already been posted?

 

[A-RON]

Another addiction that I think is often times overlooked is sexual addiction. Which is kind of weird for me to mention because I've never technically lost my virginity (as in full penetration), and yet I wonder if I might have an addiction to sex, if that makes any sense at all. By the way, it's not like I'm SUCH a loser that I can't even get any...it's just a life choice I made a very long time ago which I haven't been able to break from (with the exception of my hypocritical, related addictions). Maybe I have OCD?

 

[Grama-Herc]

Patrick

I think you will find self medication goes along with all of us who have ptsd. It is the way we survived untill diagnosed.