are emotional/implicit flashbacks always suppressed memories?

[hope4us]

im talking about when you have a certain type of flashback where you start to sweat, shake, hyperventalate, dissocciate BUT... there is no visual to it. you dont see anything or know exactly what event the flashback is..... are these repressed memories? you feel the intense fear and horror but there is no visual or facts to this type of flashback. you have a general idea what the event was... like abuse for example. but you cant pin point the exact event.... such as "when he hit me with the bat and broke my jaw" or "when he strangled me with that long rope" there are no SPECIFICS.

 

[joeylittle]

You can have a flashback without "seeing" the thing you're flashing back to. I think what you are describing might be more along the lines of a panic episode...I wouldn't assume it's repressed memories. Others may have thoughts.

 

[Friday]

I don’t have repressed memories. + Maybe about 1/3 of my flashbacks aren’t full immersion movie style (most of mine are, but come to find? That’s pretty rare. Many people never have “nightmares while awake”), but are single sense; smelling smoke, tasting blood, reliving an emotion, etc. = So, from personal experience, nope! You don’t have to have repressed memories to have flashbacks.

That said? What you’re describing sounds like an anxiety attack, or panic attack. Sometimes those are in response to triggers or stressors ( if you haven’t read this, yet? Do! Stressor vs. Trigger - What Is A Trigger? ), and sometimes they’re in response to stress (ditto, The ptsd cup explanation), and sometimes they just strike out of a clear blue sky, or just because I was thinking about something.

 

[Ronin]

Ditto above posters.

I deal/dealt with repressed memories (or suppressed - two different things) quite a lot and oft times, there was zip zilch nada somatic about them. Just the sense of unease, numb, blank, not being able to recall until something broke the levee and it just flooded open... or someone who knew me then asked me in enough concrete way and added just the specific area I checked out of.

That and repressed memories? I also many times knew what event was there. But I wasnt there for it. You could read me a history book and it would be less dry and boring than my life.

Dont confuse things youre emotional about, with how much they tell, memory wise.

 

[Mee]

Here is a weird sentence but here goes- I am not aware of having any suppressed memories, Yet I have ‘emotional’ flashbacks.

I have forgotten things but can recall them without any trauma. I also have some confusion about stuff- that’s pretty normal I think , It’s pretty unusual and a gift of a savant to remember everything and not have it tainted or confused especially if you live with habitual gaslighters. For me the ‘emotional flashbacks’ are things I know about. Some times they are double layered though, incidents from my ptsd incident that is STRONGLY emotionally aligned with a childhood experience. Not a repressed memory but a .. ‘ but I am an adult now why do I feel like a child and I healed from this before but it feels exactly how this feels emotionally so which incident am I freaking over?’

That kind of ‘compound’ emotion over more than one situation can feel confusing and I wonder if I did not have a decentish timeline of my life if I could fear more went on I had suppressed?


I have forgotten, not suppressed, bad stuff , good stuff and indifferent stuff I sometimes remember again . The bad stuff I think I just ...healed up from. The scar formed cleanly.

Anyway... no, another voice saying that emotional flashbacks aren’t only suppressed memories. They are the majority of my flashbacks

 

[Survivor3]

I don't know.

My flashbacks are real and are not suppressed memories. I don't have suppressed memories. I'm an open book to myself.
my flashbacks are really vivid and can be triggered but certain emotional states.

 

[Justmehere]

Dissociative amnesia is a coping mechanism for the brain to shut out what is otherwise overwhelming. Be careful about trying to push past it until solid coping tools are on board.

where you start to sweat, shake, hyperventalate, dissocciate BUT... there is no visual to it. you dont see anything or know exactly what event the flashback is..... are these repressed memories?

A symptom isn’t always a sign of a repressed memory. I have all the symptoms you describe in ways that do not link to a repressed memory but just the fight/flight/freeze/fawn survival responses happening at times I don’t need it - aka life with PTSD.

Ex: I have had panic attacks at the mall. Feels like I’m being strangled all of a sudden. It has nothing to do with the mall or any specific memory. It’s PTSD showing up because I’m stressed out and my stress cup is overflowing. This is a good link to understand why symptoms may happen when they do: The Ptsd Cup Explanation

Be really careful about chasing anything that feels like a repressed memory too far. Some of my trauma was taped, and I can’t remember it for the life of me, not even after I saw a part of the tape of what I didn’t remember. Some of it has come back over time... but prior to seeing the tape, in the hands of a wacky therapist who had me chasing repressed memories by trying to link each body sensation to a specific trauma, I straight up started to feel like a couple of things that were not true were actually maybe possible about the trauma that was on tape...It did NOT create any false memories but rather totally wrong guesses and assumptions, only to eventually see it in evidence that it was wrong... (What was on tape was worse. :() It’s not always a straight line how the body/brain holds trauma or how it resurfaces.

The not knowing is very hard, but be careful to not assume this or that body sensations means this or that trauma. Listen to your gut and intuition, but also hold it lightly as things stabilize. You’ve been through a lot and are just starting therapy. Recovery is possible without knowing, and it seems like many people seem to remember when they are “ready.” I’ve found the best way to get at remembering what I can’t remember is really work on stability and grounding. The more present and safe I feel, the more my brain can recall. It’s like there is space for it and my brain doesn’t have to use amnesia anymore to cope with the pain. If I am in a high symptom time, sometimes I struggle to remember even yesterday’s non-traumatic events. I actually found it easier to remember things when I treated body sensations as just body sensations. More came back because I could hold it more objectively rather than getting really worried this or that feeling meant this or that. Remembering has been a mixed bag, helpful in some ways, not as much in other ways.

 

[Sideways]

Exactly what @Ronin said - I'm aware that I have repressed memories (hate that phrase for some reason - they're just memories that, for a myriad of complex reasons, my brain refuses to give me conscious access to). They are thoroughly repressed.

And I need to leave those memories alone. If I press my brain at all for answers, hints, or suggestions? Quick way to get brain to produce bogus 'memories' based on a mix of educated guesswork, life experience, and other people's experiences, because the part of the brain seeking answers? Is not the same part of the brain that's holding back memories from me.

 

[Ronin]

.... Or, a tie in to what both Sideways and JustMeHere said about memories, it could be worse - you could remember the things. And myriad of others, because memory aint so simple as just scissor out lil bits by desire.

It could be overwhelming as fawk even with normal life events, just repressed. In case of trauma? Fast ride to hell.

So unless you LIKE bad rides? Dont chase it. And if you do? Keep it safe. Which means stability and backup of people that won't mess you around, dealt with it before, and won't spin you/ both seriously well meaning and seriously not-new-to-psych injuries.

 

[katz]

I have had physical memories a couple of times. I didn't know what they were from till later. It usually takes me a few hours/days to figure out what caused it. It is usually something small. A smell, sound.