Being Frozen

[Meadowsweet]

I experience different types of dissociation. Mostly, I am fully functioning and I'm ok with that.

But what happens more often, is that I freeze. My brain stops and its very difficult to work out how to move. For example, writing my trauma diary yesterday, I came to a stop and I don't know how long I sat just staring, but then I thought I need to press 'send' and it took me at least 10 seconds for me to tell my hand to move. When I last went to doctors, I felt like my legs wouldn't move when my name was called, or that I would fall over if I tried to stand up.

In the past, I've fainted in public and I find the embarrassment very distressing. So I have a fear that I will be in public and I will dissociate so much I won't be able to move and I'll just be stuck in front of lots of people.

I don't want to get in the habit of not going out because Im afraid of this. So I wanted to ask if others experience this, what do you do?

 

[simplekindofgirl]

I go through this too. I am often doing normal activities when it occurs, but it is like someone hits a reset button and I am starting a new system and I need time for my brain to boot back up- and since I am evidently running myself on a windows system as I have several security flaws and have a tendency to crash without reason, all while requiring constant updates- I simply have to wait until I am done rebooting. And depending on the error, it can be a short moment, or it can take quite sometime.

Nothing has helped me in these cases except time.

 

[Meadowsweet]

What a fabulous analogy.

 

[AuraBunny]

I experienced dissociation because of sexual abuse and trauma that I've recently been going through. What tends to help my mind spring back is to do more exercise like cardio, this keeps our blood pumping and releases dopamine in the brain that helps us feel happy. In the past I experienced freezing even at school when I felt no one wanted to be around me. It was so bad, I had to keep alot of it to myself and i never got help because I thought it would make people leave me. Sometimes at home when I'm by myself it's the hardest because i find it hard to move forward from the memories that kept me this way. I have done many things to try and realize it just takes time, you have to try and find what works for you. Never give up and pick up some hobbies. In public, don't worry too much about what they think, you should treat yourself better. Things will get better. :)

 

[bill1102inf]

I go through this A LOT. It seems to just happen, especially during routine automatic things, but sometimes, during discussions. Ive had it really freak people out when I just shut off mid sentence, them thinking I had a seizure or something. Almost like a day dream with nothing there, I have to literally force myself to move or talk. I just call it frozen or 'stuck'. I remember this happening a few times during combat operations. I also know other vets this happens to as well, I am really surprised there is not a specific word for it.

 

[Red Feather]

I have been freezing up more and more. Yesterday it took me more than five hours to get up out of bed. It wasn't because I was so comfortable. I literally couldn't move with phases that lasted more than an hour. Three mornings in a row it happened when I had to go to the unemployment office. I really really had to go, but just froze. I think the more pressure I put on myself, the more the other part of me rebels and says "Nope. You're not moving now...!" The following monday, I got myself so hyped up about going and thought and prepared myself so much that I did it and didn't freeze. It was a relief.

 

[Meadowsweet]

Well done Nadia. I find I have to prepare to do things that I know I will find difficult.

 

[Zef]

I get the same thing. Sometimes my brain is fully alert, but cannot make my body move. Sometimes my brain is not much there and my physical movements start slowing down and many times come to a stop. Sometimes if I'm walking, I suddenly slow way down and it's difficult to take the next step. Same thing with typing.

It's like I lose connection between my brain and body. Then, at some point, I get it the connection back and everything is normal.

 

[Powder]

For me it feels the same. I will have it keep going though. I will want to leave the house and do things, but something won't allow me to leave. I feel frozen there.

This happens at work, too. I just want to go home, but I keep finding things to do, like I get distracted, and something doesn't let me move out of my chair; I just feel stuck there. I'll tell my spouse that I'm almost ready to leave, but I'll be very late because it takes me so long to get "unstuck!"

 

[Bubba]

I freeze and shut down when conversations get too tense or emotional - especially when directed at me. I've been doing this since as long as I can remember. I just literally shut up, don't move, don't make eye contact. I can hear them talking and I can sometimes provide a monosyllable response - but basically my mind is frozen. I can't think and I can't talk. I also have periods where it can take me two hours to do something. I'll just sit there zombie like, not really watching tv, not really doing anything. Just sitting and staring.

 

[Lainey]

I know this all to well. I feel "paralyzed"... But it's like I'm not there at all... When I snap out of it it could be mins or hours later. My friends notice when I do it in public and it will jolt be back quickly. Sometimes though I'm 100% there, but my body doesn't respond in the least. It's hard for me to describe, but I know your pain...