Other Betrayal - Cause Of Trauma?

[Curzone]

Oh, yeah. About the meds… I haven’t been sleeping much. My psych did warn me about the side affects and to prepare myself for them. I just didn’t expect them to do what they did. Actually I didn’t really know what I was expecting - didn’t expect to feel so zoned-out.

I’ll keep at them. Actually I’m going to take one now. Haven't slept for 48 hours. I guess I need to keep them up for a month before taking affect.

They make me so damn hungry. Seriously, there’s still no food in the house after the last one I took. They’re crazy. Best I dust down my gym.

 

[shimmerz]

http://blogs.psychcentral.com/sex/2...-sexual-and-intimate-betrayal-as-trauma-ptsd/

 

[Pretty Hurts]

maybe if you take them before bed, you can sleep and then function better during the days?

 

[Queen Boudica]

Guess I did come across very kick-arse. Going through a lot, seem to be getting blunter in my old age. Anyway, that's it for me, my kids keep me going. I developed complex trauma because of my mother's uncontrolled behaviour, she was probably borderline and a whole lot more, and I don't want my kids getting this. It is hard. But they are the best things in my life. So every-time I think of I can't stand this and I want to end this, I think of the effect on them ( I also know what it is like because my sister suicided, oh and she was completely out of control borderline, there was nothing I could do to help her, it was a train wreck waiting to happen). You have many good times awaiting you with your daughter, and probably more kids if you find someone else. That's hope. And in the bad times you cling onto that image. Believe me I know the bad times and how it is like drowning in mud and I could rip my skin apart. But then it doesn't last.

 

[Curzone]

No, you’re just being honest, which I respect. Actually, it’s the trait that I respect the most.

That’s my main concern - how my behaviour is affecting those close to me. I don’t want to spread this like a virus. I want to give my daughter the best start in life. The last thing I want to do is jeopardise that… So, I’ve got to actively change. I need some kick-arse.

Although, I don’t think I want to find anyone else... I don’t think I’m suited to relationships any more - got too burnt. And the thought of bringing another child into this world, well, it sounds terrible, but the worlds a cruel place - I don’t want to risk more suffering on someone.

I just need to focus on myself and my daughter. Be the best I can.

Sorry to hear about your sister Lizio. I know words mean little under those kind of circumstances, but my condolences.

 

[Curzone]

Thanks for the link Shimmerz.

Pretty Hurts, oh yeah. I wouldn’t take the meds any other time. I know someone said that you get used to them over time, but is it normal to spend the day completely dissociated whilst on them? I almost spend the whole day in a trance. The day just shoots by.

 

[ghotiff]

What really helped me was learning to regularly do self soothing activities. Do you know what soothes you? Do you do those activities regularly throughout your day? I need to do them when I'm feeling "good" and it stops me slipping into the "bad".

 

[Queen Boudica]

Hi @curzon sounds like you are overmedicated or on wrong med for you to be able to work and function. They need to work with you and get one that allows you to work

 

[Pretty Hurts]

@Curzone i agree with @Lizio, you may be over medicated or that medication may not be the right fit for you. please communicate this to your psych so they can work with you to find the right one.

 

[Powder]

I find that most people attracted to Narcissists totally deny that the person who is hurting them, and others, is one. She totally sounds terrible to me. And you're being too nice to her. You didn't make the choice to be hurtful, she did. You simply over-reacted, probably due to all the trauma you've been through.

I agree with Lizzio that your child needs you around to temper the mother she got. Sounds like she is a selfish woman. She's not likely a good mom. Maybe she keeps up the appearances, but deep down, is an emotional blackmailer and traitor. Not good mom material.

I should totally know! My mom is the ultimate two-faced narc. They get mad, and they know how to really hurt you, but always make it look like it's your fault. So much so that YOU might even believe it.

I believe this is what's happened to you and why you're reeling.

 

[Chrisie]

Hi Curzon

My PTSD - from my army service - lay latent for 15 years until my husband was deployed to the Middle East. Then it finally manifested. A few counseling sessions seemed to fix it it but several yrs later, when my best friend was deployed to Afghanistan, it re-emerged and I am only just getting over the most horrendous five years of my life.

Part of the problem was that I should have seen a psychiatrist right from the start. It turned out that Abandonment lay at the heart of my trauma and I wasted two years seeing a psychologist who eventually offered that perhaps hormones were my issue. WTF.

Finding the right health provider is critical. If you don't feel you are being listened to or improving, seek another opinion. But be aware that psychotherapy raises difficult and uncomfortable questions about oneself at times and that is not a reason to change therapists.

 

[Ann Barry]

I’ve recently been diagnosed with PTSD. My psych said that it’s possible that my wife’s cheating /...

In my opinion, a betrayal trauma IS trauma. threat of death? only physical death counts? How much of an attachment was/is there? all eggs in 1 basket?
How shocked? How broken hearted?