Jawn....If I'm not mistaken she has worthy people around her. If she were planning anything drastic and told / asked advice of anyone who knows her well, they would surely and simply not allow her to side-swipe you in the way I think you're thinking....eeerrr.....I'm thinking......errrrr......what did she do again? Stole the toilet paper right? :)
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Relationship Big Shock Tonight
- Post starter Jawn
- Start date
- Status
- Post starter
- #398
- Post starter
- #400
- Post starter
- #402
Well I guess it's officially over. When we met this morning she said she wanted a divorce. Apparently her sister didn't like something I said at Thanksgiving and told my wife about it. She said "if I was sitting on the fence, you just pushed me over". Sigh.....I was only trying to get her sister to check on her. I guess my big mouth got me in trouble again.
She wants to keep it friendly and doesn't want attorneys involved. Just wants to divvy stuff up and move on. She said it was time for me to quit waiting for her and to move on and be happy. She just wants to be able to buy her own house and be alone with her dogs.
She was surprised by how calmly I took things, but I think I knew this was coming and had already shed a few tears. The woman who almost never cries was in tears while I kept it together. Well I did until I got out to the parking lot.
I can't fix her and it seems I won't be able to change her mind this time. Maybe it's time for me to really move on as much as I hate to. Very hard to do after all the years we have been together.
Sigh.......combined with the work crap, this week sucks!
Jawn
She wants to keep it friendly and doesn't want attorneys involved. Just wants to divvy stuff up and move on. She said it was time for me to quit waiting for her and to move on and be happy. She just wants to be able to buy her own house and be alone with her dogs.
She was surprised by how calmly I took things, but I think I knew this was coming and had already shed a few tears. The woman who almost never cries was in tears while I kept it together. Well I did until I got out to the parking lot.
I can't fix her and it seems I won't be able to change her mind this time. Maybe it's time for me to really move on as much as I hate to. Very hard to do after all the years we have been together.
Sigh.......combined with the work crap, this week sucks!
Jawn
deer_in_headlights
Diamond Member
(((((((((((((((Jawn))))))))))))))))))
I'm so sorry....
I'm so sorry....
D
Deleted member 5760
((((((((((Jawn)))))))))))
D
Deleted member 5760
I have to say this - and I sincerely hope it is taken in the manner in which 'free speech' is allowed on this site.
I personally don't think it was very nice of everyone to give Jawn false hope. Closure is a gift. Whilst we all like to be encouraged, without proof that can delay closure. I hope that people can stand back and look at Jawn's situation and realise that next time delaying the inevitable is not being kind to someone.
Jawn, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. All I can truly say from the depths of my SOUL is - at least now you begin the task of closure rather than putting it off. You are an awesome individual and I thoroughly believe there is an extremely lucky woman out there just WAITING for you to come along and love her.
My thoughts are with you.
(((((((Sincerely, Jen))))))))
I personally don't think it was very nice of everyone to give Jawn false hope. Closure is a gift. Whilst we all like to be encouraged, without proof that can delay closure. I hope that people can stand back and look at Jawn's situation and realise that next time delaying the inevitable is not being kind to someone.
Jawn, I'm so sorry this has happened to you. All I can truly say from the depths of my SOUL is - at least now you begin the task of closure rather than putting it off. You are an awesome individual and I thoroughly believe there is an extremely lucky woman out there just WAITING for you to come along and love her.
My thoughts are with you.
(((((((Sincerely, Jen))))))))
- Post starter
- #406
I hope so Jen, right now it just feels like crap. I'm not sure that everyone gave false hope because they just offered insight much like you have. Maybe I am just clueless, but she really seemed to be coming back towards me in many ways and now the incident with her sister has her ready to run again. But you are right, I can start closure now. I can't help but wonder what she will feel when she CAN feel again. i.e. isn't numb 'cause she admited today she can't feel love for her sisters, parents, etc. either and didn't have a good answer why she thinks that will return in time, but feelings for me won't. She could only say that I deserve to be happy and should move on.
But enough second guessing. Time to focus on me and try to figure out what I am going to do to move on and how to fix my work situation.
Thanks for the hugs everyone.
Jawn
But enough second guessing. Time to focus on me and try to figure out what I am going to do to move on and how to fix my work situation.
Thanks for the hugs everyone.
Jawn
D
Deleted member 5760
Listen Jawn honey (I hope you don't mind my using a term of endearment like 'honey' - it's meant to be endearment and not patronising) -
This has nothing to do with anything said to her sister, ok? Nothing that small could 'swing the vote' so to speak. You are spot on. Don't second guess - because I guarantee one little comment made to someone is not why this happened. Don't waste time thinking things like 'if only I hadn't said.......'
I truly believe if it was going to happen, it would have happened regardless of a tiny little comment. It's hard. I've been there. There is hope. Hope begins when you face the hard part - closure and grief.
The end of one thing is the beginning of another. My thoughts truly are with you. You deserve love.
This has nothing to do with anything said to her sister, ok? Nothing that small could 'swing the vote' so to speak. You are spot on. Don't second guess - because I guarantee one little comment made to someone is not why this happened. Don't waste time thinking things like 'if only I hadn't said.......'
I truly believe if it was going to happen, it would have happened regardless of a tiny little comment. It's hard. I've been there. There is hope. Hope begins when you face the hard part - closure and grief.
The end of one thing is the beginning of another. My thoughts truly are with you. You deserve love.
- Moderator
- #408
Nicolette
Supporter Admin
My heart goes out to you Jawn ((((hugs)))). PTSD is such a terrible illness and can destroy the most wonderful relationships filled with love no matter what you try. It's sad and horrible. I don't know what else to say other than if you need an ear I am here.
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