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Other Can You Relate? Stalking & Anti-stalking

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I have had three "stalkers" and believe me I'm no beauty (which had me questioning my own sanity for a long time). In my case, the last one was for over three years, and my mister trended to discount the gravity of what was going on - until his mother/my MIL and I were followed and she reported the same thing (I am "the PTSD").

At one point I had my mister get an unloaded rifle with a scope out of the gun cabinet and I kept it by a window where the stalker came to loiter. When he would appear, I would stop working and go into my house and lock the doors and go to the window. It took several times until I could read the tag on his vehicle with the scope on the rifle.

Some things are "public domain" anyone can run a tag/license plate number and get the registered owner of the vehicle. I had this guy's information on my refrigerator door for 4 more years. In my case, my mister finally understood the gravity of the situation. Law enforcement was of no assistance to me the whole time unless a crime was being committed by the way.

Eventually I played "decoy" with my mister... I worked in the front, he was in the back. I walked through the house and told him that the stalker was in the front. I came back to the yard (which took a lot of personal fortitude on my part) and made eye contact and let him know I knew he was there. He was so focused on me, he didn't realize my mister was coming up from behind until he was at the driver's door of his truck. My mister told him/called him by name that we had all of his personal information and if he ever showed up here again we'd go after him if not in criminal but in civil court (I had a list in a notebook of all his appearances across the street from our property and what he said/did. Even my neighbors became witnesses eventually and would sign and date and time it for me in some cases with photos).

I was the stalking victim. My mister was, like you are a secondary "victim" perhaps of sorts. My 1st husband threatened my 2nd husband and me as well, but in our case we were in an area where I had much more support than he did.

I think perhaps Opening Poster, it is good you are feeling that your level of "vigilance" is not sustainable and am glad you are here and looking for ways to deal. I would advise though against alcohol as it is a disinhibiter. Under the present circumstances I think it may be heightening your symptoms.
 
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I was told by my therapist I have PTSD about 4 months ago. It came about from a fairly complex situation...
I also see my stalkers face in every man who looks remotely similar. I log it every time too just in case it was actually him.

I have been stalked over 6 years now, first one, then accomplices of the original perpetrator. I...
My opinion, after being stalked for years, is that in this technological age the stalker can always find you even if you change your name. When I moved away I felt like the only person who even knew me was my stalker. I moved back home and although my stalker probably knows my whereabouts and can get at me, I feel safer knowing I have friends and family and I am no longer isolated. He is gonna get me if he wants to no matter what I do. I'm much happier being at home with my friends accessible to me. He isn't the only person who knows me this way.
 
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