Can't pull myself out of this anymore

[Ajor]

That's a tough one- mine is about to leave for 3 weeks so, I can relate to how it must feel. Did she talk to you about a plan to cope while shes gone? One thing my t recommended was not to journal at all while shes gone. This will help stabilize my emotions till she returns. Also, are you able to still contact your t in case of a crisis?

 

[Iju]

No, she didn't talk about a plan. Maybe because lately I've been just fine when she's gone, but I had a big upset before she left. She knew I wasn't myself, but probably thought I was ok. No, I don't have any way of contacting her. I'm all alone.

 

[Ajor]

You can talk to me :) That's the great thing about this site- also if you wanted to jump into chat, people on there are often so helpful and love offering advice/support

 

[Iju]

Thank you all. This is so hard.

 

[Ajor]

I'm sorry...I know its so tough when your T becomes such a great support and she leaves for a time (remember she is coming back though ;) ) ....I wish I could be more help but, I don't know what advice I can offer since I don't know exactly what you're struggling with...sorry

 

[Iju]

I'm not sure I'm going to keep doing therapy. I whacked out before with the fruitcake T and this is feeling familiar. Not going through this again.

 

[Ajor]

I'm sorry to hear that. I thought you said you really liked your t though? Do you feel like you're making progress?

 

[Iju]

I really was and I do. I just can't be left alone like this in crisis with no support. It's not worth it.

 

[Ajor]

If you were no longer in T wouldn't you still be in the same spot feeling like you have no support only it would be long term...While in T yes it stinks not having your t but when she comes back you will have that support again. If you were no longer in T you wouldn't have that support at all.

 

[Iju]

I get what you're saying, but I'm good at coping/ surviving. At this point, I don't have a lot of choice. I have to work.

 

[Ajor]

You say you're good at coping/surviving however, you are also stating you are having a really hard time without your T. You also stated you currently feel like you are in crisis with no support...I feel like this indicates that your t has been a good support for you and you do feel like you need her?

 

[Iju]

Yah. I just can't handle inconsistency when my parts are crazed likethis