Caregiving flashback

[Staying strong]

after 5 years of caregiving for my late wife with ALS.. I still at times can hear the suction machine etc running.. and wake up thinking she needs a Breathing treatment in the middle of the night.. at times I wake up my Girlfriend to see is she is breathing Ok.. thank god she understands

 

[7Cs]

While I don't have flashbacks from care giving I can understand the urgent need to sometimes check my husband and my son to make sure they're breathing. I know it's because of how many loved ones I lost as a child even though they did not die. I also panic when my husband or daughter aren't home when I expect them to be... especially if I hear sirens. Recently my son was diagnosed with autoimmune (type 1) diabetes.. he's only 7. I'm afraid that I'll wake up one morning and he will not. So grateful to see his little pink cheeks and lips when I go to wake him up.