Relationship Change Over Time

[Nicolette]

Vent - I should know all the answers after almost 9 years but it still makes no sense how out of nowhere you become the enemy and spoken to like you don't deserve any decency let alone respect. I'm a villain to none of which is my doing. I just got up for heaven's sake and did everything I could to take off stress yet all I received was nastiness. I know the pattern, I've ridden this ride so many times yet I can't numb how it hits and hurts. I don't find having compassion and empathy a problem until I'm the recipient of nastiness.

On the first night when he was somewhat reasonable with it all (in not nasty, just ill), he spoke of hoping there would "one day be brain nanos which they could insert to fix inside his head" and he would have a double lot inserted just to be sure.

He's done so much better than before, I'll give him that. I just need to get through today without feeling like I shouldn't be in my own home and at the same time I don't want him to go either as he should be home with his creature comforts. Gosh I hate PTSD.

 

[Milo's papa]

Vent - I should know all the answers after almost 9 years but it still makes no sense how out of nowhere...

Nicolette, after 8 years of this nightmare world we live in you'd think I'd have some answers to. I don't. you're right, some days you get up in the morning and you're already in deep sh**. That's why "the NEW NORMAL" has become to mean so much to me and my family. No one ever knows who they're going to get. Between my wife's DID and CPTSD, life is never dull around here.
I hate DID more than I do CPTSD, but not by much.

 

[Flossy]

Vent - I should know all the answers after almost 9 years but it still makes no sense how out of nowhere...

@Nicolette
May I suggest you get some Valium into him prophylactically for the next two days....so his brain can have a rest. If you put it to him like that, he may comply. If he is reactive, you could just put one down beside him , tell him his brains needs some rest and walk away. At the least he may get a couple of nights deep sleep. A better hope, it may break the downhill spiral and avert a crisis.

 

[Nicolette]

May I suggest you get some Valium

Thanks @Flossy - I've already done that one ;)

 

[Peach]

Sorry to hear you're both having a rough time, but you seem to be managing yourself well. Of course you're scared and frustrated, we all get that way when they've gone off the rails, but you know what's happening and why and haven't let yourself have your own panic attack. Hope it doesn't take him too terribly long to calm down again.

You're absolutely right about the dogs (or any social animal really). They are so good for all of us. Tater LOVES dogs but hasn't had one in 20 years because he fears that when he gets depressed, lethargic, and isolates that he wouldn't be able to take care of it properly. I completely disagree. I know that man's soul and while the dog may not get to go play in the surf during those times, I know he would still take good care of it. Tater would be so much better for having a dog...even when it demands to go for a walk and forces him to get up and out of the house. Yet another perk of moving in together - have fun with the dog when he's feeling good and be comfortable with knowing I'd still be there to take care of it when he was unable.

 

[Sammyiam]

Hi,

I'm sorry that you are having a hard time, I hope you have lots of support and friends that can help you when things are hard.

Your dogs will help you lots mine do

Hoping everything gets better soon

Sammy

 

[Sighs]

Hugs if you accept them @Nicolette.

I often feel like I should be better at riding the roller coaster because although I've only been with my vet for 3 years, my dad and his 3 brothers have combat PTSD so I grew up with it. But it sure can smack you in the back of the head when you least expect it.

 

[ms spock]

So sorry you both are having such a hard time of it @Nicolette. You are in my thoughts, and best wishes to you through this very challenging time.

 

[BlueOrange]

It's hard, when good people hurt good people. The two of you have much to be proud of. Thank you for supporting him, and for telling your story.