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Childhood Childhood sexual abuse - flashback question

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During a traumatic experience, parts of our brain, the parts that record ordinary memories, get turned off. Or at least almost off. The parts that handle fear, fight / flight, etc.- these are dialed up to the max. That's really oversimplified, but explains why our memories are fragmented or "stored" as body sensations. They just aren't the same as memories of something neutral or nice, like a visit to grandma's or something.
In other words, what you are dealing with is very common among trauma survivors.
Therapy and telling others your story, like on this forum, helps you to verbally say what the events were, get feedback, and ultimately bring your experience back though your senses in a safe way. That's important, because as it all gets cycled it enters your brain and is stored just like normal memories. That's a huge part of the healing process.
I read once somewhere that people remember details of their trauma when they are strong enough to handle it. Meh, I'm not so sure that's true. There are large holes in my memory and I hear the same from many other survivors. I think it's reasonable to assume that I just won't remember a lot of details.
Hope that helps.
 
Hi there,

I'm new on the forum & would like to find some answers to the questions I have regarding...
Yes, i have had body memory and vague pictures for years, just recently getting flashbacks and dreams are more vivid. I guess it takes time for those things to surface
 
It took me 15 years (between age 6 and 21) to recover anything, then only small details after many more years.
 
My vaguest memories came in the shower. It was a long time before I pieced it together. All I had at first were sensations of being pushed against a wall. Nothing else. Then as I accepted that one flashback, more came to me. Same type of sensations. Then intrusive thoughts. Bits and pieces of the memory came later until I could finally figure out exactly what happened.
 
Unfortunately I noticed too late after replying to this post that the original poster hasn't been on here since November 4, 2015!
 
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