ED Come back up again

[LucyLou]

I'm not really sure why but recently, the issues with food have started again. I'm not eating anywhere near enough, considering my job is so physical.....I work in a boarding kennels, so on my feet all day and so much walking. I'm eating cereal and yogurt for the day and that's it. I went to a friend's birthday meal yesterday and told myself I could eat whilst I was there but only if I didn't have anything all day. Starting on checking weight all the time, thinking more about calories and other stuff. I haven't spoken to my therapist about it and I don't know if I will....she's likely to tell me to speak to dr but I've done all that before with Dr, dietician and hospital. I was doing so well. It feels like its something that is never going to go away....like, I can go through a good spell of a few months but it always comes up again. Anyone else have these issues? I don't know how to get myself out of it

 

[VioletButterfly]

I get it. A lot of rules, eh? It's exhausting. I've gotten to the point where I have ready to eat meals ready in the fridge and/or freezer so that I can't talk myself out of it. I also have protein shakes in the fridge as a last resort. I have to try to get in as much as I can because of my illnesses now, but it's still a struggle. A nutritionist told me that I have to have 90 grams of protein/day with all of this going on. Huh? I ran inward when she said that to me. I'm still hiding and trying to get in 40? It's a sneaky mindset I've been dealing with for many, many years. There is a lot behind that I've yet to unpack. I think it must be like cognitive distortions that we have to work through and challenge? Sometimes, I can just lay down the law with my ED voice and sometimes I have to just sneak things in during the day when I'm not thinking about it. Occasionally, I can even make a meal for myself. Guilty afterward, but still, the effort is there. The evenings are the worst for me.

Were you able to do any of this work while you had a support team? Can you look back at what worked then and maybe look at what is going on now to see if any of it is applicable and could be helpful?

Hoping you find something that can work for you. I'm sorry you're having to deal with this. Take care. VB