Complex Trauma & Ptsd

[Old Dreamer]

My adopted daughter has complex trauma associated with PTSD. We're just learning how to help..or at least not hurt. Glad to meet you. I'm new here too.

 

[mibley]

Hi all.

Complex? Not familiar with that term.

I really liked my psychologist, but took me 3 years to open up enough to cry in front of him, so I figured that wasn't really productive, but miss him cuz we had fun - my coping mech - ham it up.

I hear you, whoever said about one thing after another. I never seem to get to 'recover' or regroup before the long arm of the universe is reaching out again. I'm figuring the gods are up there laughing there asses off at me.

I live an isolated type of life - sometimes it just so much easier. People wear me out too much politics, bickering, having to be 'miss happy go lucky' and then I crash and burn the moment I'M OUTTA THERE and the smile drops from the face and I'm just emotionally draineddddd.

 

[Old Dreamer]

I know. I am beginning to understand that. I've very new to seeing this on such a personal level. It is so difficult tat times. I found out recently that I have become a "trigger." I never was that before. It really hurts.

 

[mibley]

You being a trigger may actually have nothing to do with you per se. It may be that something you do reminds her of something/someone else. Sometimes to get better, everything has to surface so it's dealt with. I'm in the process and don't know really if I am doing about this right or not. the fact that I'm on a computer thing says loads for my state of mind. Sometimes people 'set me off' for no immediately discernible reason. I'll admit something here that used to happen to me and I can't explain it or even come close to understanding it - when I was really young, I got VERY angry when my mother would cook baked potatoes - yes baked potatoes pissed me off. go freaking figure. If that doesn't make you laugh...

 

[Old Dreamer]

Well I hope so, though all her fear and anxiety currently revolve around me (I'm one in a long list it seems). When I looked her request for a protection order, the behavior she listed had nothing to do with my wife and I (we're very pacific and quiet people) and everything to do with the behavior of her birth father (screaming, fear of his violence, law breaking, etc). Believe it or not, when I saw that and her cover letter, it revealed a lot of her mind. Just like my therapist said, it really had little or nothing to do with me. It's odd how much comfort that gave me! I guess where I'm at a month later is imply mourning and not guilt. Thanks so much for posting. My wife and I are much better now.