Confused...Help

[jilbrwn]

I never really knew anything about PTSD until recently ,when my boyfriend told me he was diagnosed with it when he was a teenager due to a terrible auto accident where he caused the death of someone. A week ago he found his dog killed tragiclly. Although I was the first person he came to tell,I am now the one person he doesn't seem to want in his life. Things have changed so drastically in a weeks time~the sweet wonderful guy that I spent a year of my life with is now someone I don't even know. He's angry,irritable and has lashed out at me which he has never done before. He now wants no responsibilities...like me...and he wants to get rid of his other dog now. When I have asked him about "us" he can't even tell me anything other than he feels numb and then proceeds to get irritated. Does this sound familar to anyone? Is there any sort of time frame and do people go back to how they were before or is this how he is now? Any help would be appreciated...its so hard and confusing how things can change so drastically..

 

[cheatermoves]

Hello I have been diagnosed with PTSD from a car accident also. What I think is going on from reading your post is that if he did kill someone in an auto accident he is most likely living with a great deal of guilt. I myself was the victim of someone else’s reckless driving and from what I was told the person who caused my accident felt very bad about it. I think the death of his dog must remind him of the death of the person he killed in the accident. I’m not totally sure because I don’t know him. Everyone reacts to things differently. I know when someone has PTSD there is a term called triggering. There is certain events that can cause a person to relive the pain of their trauma. For example say a person was robbed at gun point by a man wearing a brown sweater. Now whenever that person sees a brown sweater, even just lying on the ground, they feel extreme fear, panic, and anxiety. I get triggered a lot when I see other cars on the road coming to quick stops at intersections. Some days its better than others. For me it got a lot better when I started being my own driver again. This is because when I’m a passenger in a car I don’t feel like I’m in control and it reminds me of not being in control during the accident. Also, in my case with PTSD I felt like people did not understand. My therapist told me this is very common in people suffering from PTSD. He could feel like maybe you don’t understand and is upset about it. I’m sorry I hope I was helpful. I would encourage you to ask him to see a therapist. You can message me privately if you want to ask me any questions. I hope all gets better for you and him.

 

[blackpearl]

Hi jilbrwn,

It sounds very familiar. I don't know, but I suppose the accident with his dog trigged his Ptsd and the memories of him driving someone else to death. The process starts with heavy feelings of guilt and the anger is I think his way to protect him self from dying spiritually of what he's dealing with. When bad things happens we as humans tend to forget and go on, until something in future repeat that memory.

It's likely that it was a big trigger for him and that he's now forced to face some memories in the past he no longer are able to deny or let delay. It's something his body is doing for him, the emotions are so strong that they have to get out in a way or another this time. There is nothing you can do if he doesn't want you to be around. Dealing with Ptsd is very hard and it really takes some common ground if you are planing to stay with him. In worst case he can if you don't know him well enough torment you as well. What do you think ?

Greetings,
Blackpearl