Could This Be Depression?

[Fadeaway]

I have been diagnoses with depression before, but it was always situational. I had good reason to be depressed.
The last 4 months have been unusually difficult. Murphy's law amplified. I seriously couldn't make up the bizarr repetition of freak incidents that have occurred recently if I tried.My husband lost 6 jobs in 4 months due to no fault of his own. He would get hired and then the company would collapse a few days later, or his position would be outsourced or he would lose the job because he couldn't get to work on time because the car tires were slashed. Literally, couldn't make this stuff up.

Anyways, we just came from a month long panic of being evicted with no where to go. We were down to the wire with 5 hours left before the cops were supposed to force us out if we didn't pay. Hubby broke down asked his toxic parents for help which is nothing short of a miracle. Things should be looking up now.

The problem is, as someone who identifies as an extreme insomniac, all I want to do is sleep the last few days. I still struggle to sleep when I have the flu, so this is extremely bizarre and worrisome. My dr. shrugged it off as stress, but he has only seen me a couple times and doesn't really know me. Normal things I enjoy seem boring to me over the last few days. This is not normal for me at all. I feel like I have the opposite of PTSD atm. instead of being hypervigilant seem to have my senses dulled.

I always feel out of sorts on days after being triggered and fatigued but this is different.

 

[hodge]

I'm glad things are looking up financially. That helps. Still, I would think it has contributed to your feelings.

Not enjoying things you used to is a sign of depression, but there are about 10 questions on the assessment. I just had to take my monthly depression and anxiety assessment at therapy Monday.

Just found the one I take every month: http://www.integration.samhsa.gov/images/res/PHQ - Questions.pdf

Evidently, this is a pretty standard guideline for Ts and psychs. I have to answer this every time I see my psych also.

 

[Suzetig]

It could be depression, it could be the adrenaline dump after an incredibly stressful time. Your body, heart and mind may just need to catch its breath, not clinical as such but just worn out?

 

[hodge]

This also sounds situational, due to all the bad setbacks. Being on the verge of losing your home is definitely a trigger for depression. I am praying he finds a good, stable job.

 

[Fadeaway]

Makes sense about it being an adrenaline dump, I just don't remember feeling this way after previous long term stressful situations. Which is why I am concerned. Feeling like this is new to me.

 

[Deleted member 541]

@Fadeaway I agree with @Suzetig that it could be adrenaline dump. Whatever it is, be grateful that your body is getting some well deserved sleep and rest. Sounds strange, but when we finally start having healthy reactions, like you sleeping, we think there is something wrong. We've been so accustomed to lack of (fill in the blank) that when things reverse, we're like, what the hell????

Enjoy the rest!!!!

 

[joeylittle]

I'm sorry, @Fadeaway - that's all a really rough time you described.

Your current situation (and question) is one of the reasons the depression inventories ask about a two week period. So, right now it could be coming off of all that adrenaline, or it could be seasonal, or it could be other things, or depression. If the fatigue and the anhedonia don't lift over the next 10 or so days, then depression becomes much more likely.

Right now I'd say, let your body sleep. But do make sure you are eating and getting plenty of water. A little light exercise and very short list of daily goals (like eat, read, 10 minute walk....very simple stuff) - those can help you move back towards your own normal. I do hope it lifts for you.

 

[Fadeaway]

I am actually hoping I can sleep off the next couple of days. Today was just one pure panic attack starting at 9am until 11pm. Stressful situation that took running all over hell to resolve. I am just praying for a very boring 2017. I still feel super off. I also wasn't taking into account trauma anniversary due too all the other stress. Could be the shear combo of it all.

Food and drink is good. I need to remember to eat.

 

[Fadeaway]

It is so weird. Yesterday with the high Stress and Anxiety I didn't feel so bad. Now that feeling is back. I told my husband that I almost long for anxiety because it is familiar. This is very disconcerting because I don't know what to do with it. It's foreign.

I think it's sad when anxiety becomes a familiar friend. Now, apathy is taking root again. I look at the scar on my arm where I sliced into it with a chunk of glass from a candle I broke. It should be a reminder of the Lost I experienced on this day years ago, instead I feel nothing.

I feel separate from my body. Probably a bit of dissociation. earlier I felt as though my soul was going to separate from my body and Drift Away. It was very unnerving.

 

[The Albatross]

It could also be that the immediate issue of eviction is solved for now, but that the risk is still present? Personally I do suspect another round of situational depression. The original solvency issue is still present, right?