Depression Is...

[scaldedsheep]

Depression is:

1. The ugliness of the world. To look out and see the throngs of people just stewing together like rotten meat in a giant cauldron.
2. Being stuck in a body that isn't yours that you have to drag around everywhere you go and living a life that isn't yours.
3. Not ever knowing what you feel so you have to pretend to have the appropriate reaction to certain situations
4. the horrible, unbearable boredom, lack of true justice, lack of anything emotionally significant or moving
5. the longing for complete annihilation not just death

I guess the lack of justice is really sort of a fairytale idea since good and evil are as well. I guess you can't have justice when it doesn't really exist. Good and evil are concepts created from religious ideology and don't exist in the natural world. So I guess the only good and evil that matters in the world is what is good and evil to you as an individual.

How I Deal with Depression:

1. After almost twelve years of dragging myself through life I can no longer deal with my depression. I have finally been completely crushed by it. I have no idea what to do about it besides adminsiter some well-deserved vigilante justice and quietly take my leave.

 

[mamachick]

Depression is the paralyzing monster. It takes over the brain and leaves me indecisive, wanting to stand up and wanting to sit down at the same time. Wanting to take a shower and wanting to watch some brainless tv show, wanting to go to the store for necessities and argueing that I could forego the items another day. The activity that takes the least energy tends to win. The longer this monster brain guest stays, the harder it is to rid of him.

I use to force myself to do the activity that takes the most energy (at least life is in order) in hopes that this monster would leave. When I get to the path of least resistance from fighting this monster, I have been defeated for the time. I find myself patiently waiting to "live" as if that will magically happen. That might be a good sign, a sign of having hope.

 

[Deleted member 1860]

For me, depression isn't "anger turned inward"... It's not about some theorized chemical such as seratonin being out of whack in my brain. It's all about overwhelming anxiety that ultimately renders me emotionally paralyzed. I could go on, but...

 

[AngelaMarie]

Depression is:

Lonliness and isolation.
Struggling daily to function.
Having a lot of health problems.
Dealing with suicidal thoughts (even though I know I won't try again because of my children).
Having little hope for change or for the future.
Having fear that depression will pass on to my children.
Fear that I will end up like my family.
Feelings of being unworthy of anything positive.
Emotionally eating, struggles with alcohol and other destructive behaviours.


To combat:
I take days off from the pressure around me.
I spend quality time with my boys and remind myself I can't be all bad if I have them.
I set goals on some days to try and be as normal as possible.
I try to do something I like to do for myself (work on a doodle art, read a book, do a word search puzzle).
I say positive things to myself.
If I isolate too long I push myself to leave the house even if only for a walk.
I come on the forum for support from people that understand.

 

[Queen Boudica]

Feeling so low and down, you know you will never get up again.

You are incapable of doing anything properly.

You are useless, hopeless, stupid, nothing you do is right.

If you do get something achieved, sooner or later, it will be proved useless.

You are incapable of socialising; you are always the alien, the one people stare at, talk about you behind your back and don't want to include you.

You cannot cope with the slightest criticism or something going wrong or not how you thought it would go. Panic erupts.

You worry about everything and try to plan for every single bad outcome so you are prepared. But you can never do it and something always goes wrong - panic.

Panic, fear, self-hatred.

You can't possible imagine how you will ever get past this and be able to function to support yourself and your kids.

Doom.