Dissociation Explained

[Lionheart]

I was diagnosed with having Fragmented Personality Disorder, is this the same as DID?

And by the way, Anthony, thank you for the explanations about dissociation, this is one of the most helpful things I have seen in my 6 years on this site!!!

 

[HypnoticallyChaotic]

Question for personal reasons.

What type of ptsd dissociation would involve feeling like a completely 'different' person, while still feeling like one's self in a distant sorta way, but still having most memories of what happens, while feeling little if any emotion at all?

Also.. what type of dissociation involves blacking out completely and being a different person, and then it suddenly all stops one day and one seems fine, but having no memory whatsoever of whatever happened during the blackouts? (I was already told this was not DID, to clarify or specify. It happened later in life, two rounds of episodes, and almost a third that I prevented successfully.)

 

[greenleaf]

Question for personal reasons.

What type of ptsd dissociation would involve feeling like a...

There is a thing called a "dissociative fugue" which might fit, but you need to ask a professional -- ideally someone with relevant specializations, like with trauma, dissociation, etc.

 

[sleepingwolf]

I found this an amazing thread, really great to hear about others experiences and more information about it. I'm also sorry to hear about the hard times you guys have written about and shared. :hug:
I'm slowly exploring this topic myself, and learning more about it.

In my experience I would say that I do interact with various 'parts', but that they don't overpower me, or I don't loose full control. They are all characters, and are spiritually connected, as I always read a lot of spiritual books growing up. For example, one character is my more creative and rebellious side, another my more geeky side. We keep in contact and I take inspiration from them, of how to make my life more fruitful and interesting. Its always positive though, and makes my life more vibrant. For emotional and creative things my characters are all female, for more rational and active things, they are male. Some are scary looking, but all are kind overall.

 

[Deleted member 27340]

I get a flavour of dissociation where everything turns black and white, I get tunnel sight, everything loses depth and gets darker while my eyes are fixated on one point and I can't move, talk or think properly. Eventually it looks like everything is 2D and with no colour at all, and what I see might go almost entirely black if it's really bad.

 

[lostforgottensoul]

Fragments with Identities and Functions.

I love that you re-explained this. I always was scared i had DID because during the abuse i had two known alters (maybe more) but i knew what was happening, never lost memory so it may not fit and i dropped them when i moved out.

Now i do the "Dissociative Episodes" a lot...mostly in therapy but do it at home during drama or high stress times and even sometimes at work. At night. I also disassociate myself into shows, maybe to pretend i had a happy safe family? It makes me feel safe anyway. I do it a lot.

 

[Blingkatt]

View attachment 3225

Originally posted by @Anna5 - Referencing Bill Tollefson...

Thank you for such a well written explanation of Dissociation. I do suffer from DID. The problem I have is different from what you posted about Dissociation being a survival mechanism. When I dissociate now, (which only happens every year or so, thank goodness), I end up in the ICU in restraints with no memory of what occurred, but am told by the medical staff that I tried to commit suicide. This has happened 5 times in the last 8 years.The last time this happened I had a friend that spent some part of the evening with me and she said it was like a switch was 'turned on' and I became someone she had never seen before. My question is, could the Dissociation be so strong that it would rather I die than face whatever it is protecting? Obviously, this is incredibly scary. I have done a lot of research, since the professionals in my small town have no idea how to help me. I'd appreciate any comments or help as this is not the way I want to live. I have spent the last 30 years in some form of therapy or trauma program. I have come a long way, done a lot of work and my life is basically happy, but the chance of this happening again leaves a deep shadow that scares me terribly.

 

[anonymous]

Thank you for such a well written explanation of Dissociation. I do suffer from DID. The problem I hav...

Hi,
The way I understand it starts as a survival method and can be very effective then but when it becomes a disorder is when it now causes difficulties in our lives. And yes, sometimes real danger.

Anyone with a history of abuse can be suicidal. If you do have DID other of your parts may have more difficult experiences and not as much coping abilities as you do and may become overwhelmed more easily and therefore suicidal. It might be that that part comes out when you are low and triggered and then things head to a dangerous place quickly.

You don't really know how things would be or if you would have survived this long if you hadn't dissociated. If you have DID it sounds like you have a very distressed part that needs taking care of.

I hope things start changing for you.

 

[Blingkatt]

Thanks for your reply, Anonymous, it makes me feel less alone with this problem. I think you are right, even after 30 years of therapy there must be a 'nugget' of trauma that I have not dealt with. It may be the core nugget. I will keep at it.

 

[anonymous]

Thanks for your reply, Anonymous, it makes me feel less alone with this problem. I think you are right...

If there is a part of you that is taking over and you don't have communication with it then it sounds like you need to build a relationship there and have that all working better for you. Or you definitely need to work on new skills managing your dissociation regardless. Good luck. You can do it.

 

[Nevermore]

I haven't read all the replies but that article was really interesting. I'm not sure if I glaze over and stare - but I do have periods of time, can go for days, where I feel like I'm not inside myself. It's like someone could attack me and I wouldn't even be there enough or aware enough to even try to stop it.
It really scares me!!!!!!
I can't force myself to come back but I am aware I'm not really there. It's embarrassing too as I think I can appear really stupid - find it hard to follow what people are saying.
Is this the same thing or something different?
I try to avoid people and the world when I'm like that. It does feel so scary and I'm often not sure of what brings it on
Are there any tricks for bringing yourself back??

 

[mamachick]

I do the same jojo, or very similar. I get really disconnected, feel like I am just blank and can not come around and focus. I feel glazed over and that I must appear stupid. Mine seems to be getting worse over the years and I was thinking that maybe it was something medical but not so much after re-reading this topic. It seems worse since I have gone off meds that control pain somewhat and adderoll that turns my brain to the wake cycle. I can hardly stand to be around people as it is just too much work.