Distancing Yourself From Family & Friends. Anyone Else Do This? Why?

[savvybeachbum]

Yes, I isolate myself as well. I cringe when I think about talking on the phone to family sometimes. I guess I just don't feel like explaining that I haven't been doing anything exciting because I'm depressed again, I don't know what the deal is, but lately, I've been disconnecting myself from friends and family. I'm right there with what Kat said in this thread, I just feel happier when I'm alone sometimes, there's no pressure, I can just go with my own flow.

 

[Heather]

I've just resigned myself to being alone especially in the last several months. Dealing with other people is just too hard. My therapist doesn't even want to deal with me at times but he has no choice..... He claims, "I'm a difficult patient". I said, "who me? I resemble that":p.

Well, at least I recognize it right? I don't even want to deal with me when it gets really bad. *sigh*

 

[WonderingWhy]

My therapist doesn't even want to deal with me at times but he has no choice..... He claims, "I'm a difficult patient". I said, "who me? I resemble that"

I hope your therapist said that sarcastically! If he was serious I would never want to go back there ever again. Truthfully even if it was said jokingly, myself I would not be able to go back, or have any trust if I had to.

I feel that was completely inappropriate for him to say.

How did you feel after he said that?

 

[Lucycat]

He claims, "I'm a difficult patient"

I'm one better than that. I am a 'complicated patient'!!:applause:

But then, I always knew I was different:p

 

[WonderingWhy]

Complicated I can live with, but difficult I think is inappropriate. imho

 

[Heather]

He was quoting me actually. He puts up with A LOT:).

I'm lucky he has a good sense of humor. He asked me today what else he could do for me and I asked him if he could spin the earth back in time like superman did when he saved Lois Lane? He said, "no".

Then I asked him during our next appointment if he could at least wear the cape? LOL:D He just started to laugh.

 

[WonderingWhy]

If it was in jest and he knew you would take it as such. I guess I'll let him pass. If that were said to me, it would have me running far far away!!:running:

 

[Heather]

I guess I'm not telling the whole story. A few years back when my brother-in-law sexually assaulted me I was working with a different counselor (Michael). I've known him since I was 18 y/o. He was VERY reluctant to work with me because he remembered what I was like back then.

When I'm having flashbacks, nightmares, not eating etc. etc. I'm not easy to deal with. But I guess who is when going through this sh*t, right? Although, I've had a therapist with 30 yrs experience in dealing with trauma tell me I'm a lot to deal with haha. However, when I'm more stable.....those words never leave a therapists mouth.

So, my current therapist and I began working together waaay before the sh*t hit the fan. And I was telling him about how Michael didn't want to work with me (although he never would admit that to me) because he remembered what I was like at 18 y/o. But then he saw what a difference there was at 35 y/o and I'm sure he took a big sigh of relief. So, one day we were talking about this and my therapist said, "even you've said you are a difficult patient". I know I give him a hard time. I freely admit that. I am NOT easy to deal with. I feel bad too for the way I've treated him. NOT NICE.

So, that's how that has come about.

 

[WonderingWhy]

Makes sense.:dance:

I'm sure you can understand, that at 1st it sounded quite inappropriate?

 

[Heather]

Absolutely!

 

[13 and 65]

Isolating your self is a very common response to trauma. It somehow seems easier not to have to deal with anyone or anything. That way no one can hurt us, or stress us out.

I,too, have stopped the communication with my daughters, mainly because I am afraid of them finding out and feeling sorry for me. I just want to get happy and "get over it" and be with my children, their spouses and grandchildren

 

[Lucycat]

Complicated I can live with, but difficult I think is inappropriate. imho

Oh well, I am now officially difficult as well!
T. very quickly corrected himself and said it is a very difficult situation that I am in.

I am back to isolating again. I know I am doing it. Just can't be bothered to go out and socialise. However I have agreed to go to DIL's 40th Birthday party tomorrow! Rory has booked a Hotel so we don't have the long drive home afterwards. I'd much rather not go, but I know the grandchildren will be pleased to see me. I don't have to pretend with them. They just accept me as I am.