Doubting Your Therapist

[Justin87]

Does anyone get angry at their therapist or doubt their ability to handle their issues? I’ve constantly been plagued with the thought of “He can’t handle my sh*t.” I even had a dream about a session where my T had to stop and sent me home. We worked through a lot of those thoughts early on (I’ve been seeing him over a year). But recently since we really started to hit some new pockets of shame, it’s come back up. Particularly doubting his ability. Even though he has consistently been able to deal with everything I throw at him and he’s been really helpful. It’s like “I just need to see someone else…anyone else.”
Just wondering about others experiences.

 

[Justin87]

Oh, I was also wondering about projecting your mom or dad onto your therapist. Does anyone else do that? My therapist is probably only 10ish years old than me so I don’t do that with him. However, I’ve wondered if I project myself in a similar way onto him. Thanks.

 

[LuckyDuck]

I have had that happen once so far. I gave her one session to help accommodate me. She did well, and I'm still seeing her. It seems a normal thing to go through, as it's a strange relationship to begin with.

 

[Friday]

Even though he has consistently been able to deal with everything I throw at him and he’s been really helpful. It’s like “I just need to see someone else…anyone else.”.

Wanting to run? Yes.

Using that particular excuse? No.

I have a lot of excuses for running. To date, though, if I don't think they've got the ability? They don't consistently prove me wrong or be really helpful. That would be the tell on irrational thinking / coming up with excuses not to go.

Most of my excuses are similarly irrational, however. Like "I bet the Ukraine is gorgeous in the springtime." You know, when it's sort of at War, right now. Sure. Perfect time to go there on vacation.

 

[latetotheparty]

I once went to a therapist that I thought to be under qualified, condescending and well judgmental. I went to this particular therapist because it was free through my campus but the therapist seemed overwhelmed and unwilling to listen to me. At the time I still hadn't been diagnosed with PTSD, so she probably was still assessing me. However, at the time I just wanted relief and answers, instead she recommended I buy $50 dandelion root from a health store, instead of teaching my coping mechanisms. I left after one session, bitter, confused and feeling like crap about myself. It put a bad taste in my mouth for years about therapy. I think as long as you find a therapist that you are comfortable with and that supports you in the way you need to be supported, you should stick with them. Comfort is key.

 

[watundah]

I have been in this spot because I felt like we weren't making any progress and doubted her capabilities. I would leave irritated that we were discussing surface crap and not digging deeply enough. When I confronted her about it she pointed out that the need to go slow is important so as to not retraumatize me. Ive heard that but I thought we were moving inordinately slowly. In truth, the problem was me and me inability to open up. She has gently been nudging me along and apparently leaving me to set the pace.

So, if he isn't doing anything that you can pinpoint that you don't like, are you possibly on the edge of a breakthrough or getting overwhelmed by the shame topic and maybe looking for a way out?

I was curious about 6 months ago and went to another therapist once for a looky loo and comparison and decided to stick where I was. Maybe you could try that.