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End of a 7 year online friendship

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Anyway I just noticed your Albert Camus quote as your signature.

An old friend did a cross stitch of this quote and that is all I know about Albert Camus.

It takes me a really long time to get to know someone and consider them a friend. I agree with @EveHarrington that healthy people just say no and do not destroy people.

For both of you to have mental issues is a testament to the duration of the friendship. One of my downfalls is ignoring my gut instincts and trying to be understanding and make excuses instead. Slowly learning not to do this anymore.:confused::oops::cautious:
 
Thanks everyone even the ones who were critical and seemingly negative. All feedback is good especially the stuff that hurts coz that's usually a pretty good indication of what needs to be examined. It's just only through pain that we grow anyway.

I'm sorry I put it out there. For any of you to judge me. I can understand people doubting me after the shit I spouted a couple of weeks ago that wasn't real but that some of you believed nevertheless. I was psychotic and delusional at the time but how were any of you to know that? All you can go on is what a person says and take it at face value unless proved or told its untrue.

I suppose all you really need to see is the same thing over and over again and some consistency from me for you to believe me again. I get that I honestly do. Been where you all are with me myself with other people I've known that were temporarily off their bleeding rockers. It happens. I too found it hard to trust them again after believing one thing they said then being expected to believe something else. I really truly understand it.

So no hard feelings on my end if you will accord me the same respect and not take me personally either. I know how difficult it is to know where ones personal boundaries lie. These boundaries literally get f*cked when the abuse trauma loss etc happens that triggers the Ptsd we all have.

Until recently I didn't know where my own boundaries were because I was psychotic. I thought wrongly what was inside me was coming from and inside other people. Crazy I know.

All I'm asking for is a bit of empathy and compassion and understanding. If you can't give that to me because of your own issues then that's fine. Just let me know then I can put you on ignore and you can do the same to me. The last thing I want to do is cause trouble or dissent or division. That really ain't who I am either online or in real life.

I hope I have explained myself adequately and without causing any more offence or confusion. That was never my intention either when I was psychotic or now when I'm relatively sane. Sorry everyone.

God bless.

Crazydiamond47
 
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Why did you post this reply anonymously anyway
That's none of your business.
Perhaps you're also a coward
No, definitely not.
Perhaps you're the untrustworthy one
Again, nope.
Perhaps you're just on a bloody wind up and like provoking people
Wrong again.
And again.

I was going by how you come across in your posts, and we have only your side of things to go by, I'm sure this friend of yours had good reason to not lend you any money.
 
You really tried to connect here within your thread on many levels.:tup: And there are quite a few online people within this board that have developed ‘real’ friendships within and outside of this internet space. So I get it about your feelings of friendship concerning someone you shared with online.

Insofar as allowing posting of critical feedback (either positive or negative) to influence your comfort zone of continuing to extend on this board...remember that we are powerless over others. Don’t sweat the small stuff or commentary that offers more about their attitude than who you are or your journey.

Congrats on your ownership of substance abuse, the courage to stand tall as well as moving forward in healing and recovery.
 
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