Family deny it happened.

[rayray1011]

They deny some of my traumas happened to me. One of the traumas was s.a. by a relation. They deny it happened even though the only people there were me and the abuser. The abuser has some people thinking they're the victim and not me. They've told me I imagined it, and I'm crazy. I don't care that some people they associate with won't talk to me or what they think of me. They can think what they want. I know the truth. I lived it, and live with the effects, unfortunately. It has impacted every aspect of my life. My current circumstances mean I have contact with them. We have a conflict in beliefs on how best to "fix" me. So they do believe I need fixed!!! They have alternative therapy beliefs which are in actuality, magical thinking. They had me believing in it long time ago. It was making me crazy. I do wonder if they tried to make me crazy. I also wonder about their own mental healths. I need to get away, I want to be free of it all. I want an entirely fresh start. I just don't know where or how to begin. I want to add that I am very afraid of them, and of what they may try to do to me.

Has anyone here been through the same, and gotten free of it all??? How did you do it?

I had a very similar experience in 2020 when my father passed away, he was the main source of abuse in my childhood and the reason I've developed the way I did. Before he passed from cancer, I sat down with him and confronted him about my abuse and all he could muster was "It wasn't me, I didn't do it", all I really wanted was a simple apology, and he couldn't even give that to me.

Fast forward to now, it took a long time but before I met my wife, I had a previous relationship that really opened my eye to the fact that everything that happened to me, was not my fault. It was that moment that allowed me to see through what my father was, a narcissistic asshole who didn't care about his own family.

I understand that keeping in contact with your abuser is hard and there is a part of you that is confused, because they are your 'family' but at the end of the day, if they were really your family, they wouldn't have done that to you.