Thanks for the ideas and support everyone.
Soup sounds like good goal. It's clear to me a lot of my trauma happened in the kitchen, from my earliest years, before I can remember. Was thinking about it today. It's funny how stuck some of these habits (behavioral symptoms?) like eating too fast, are. I guess becoming aware of it is the first step. I still eat too fast, so for me it's baby steps, and understanding. And being kind to myself. Because I was so terrified for so long, and I was so little. Guess it made quite an impact on my mind, because I still get teared up. When I scan or search this part of my life mentally, there's a void. Just shaky, and weepy. Becoming aware of this is, and being able to share, is pretty major for me. Thanks everyone.