Flashbacks

[illusionist]

I was told years ago that things would come to me when I was in a safe place to deal with them. I call bullshit on this. What's your experience?

 

[watundah]

Yup. Randomness is the word. Things provoke other things.

 

[Ghostybear73]

Happened to me, got to a safe place, living pretty good. Then started having extreme anger issues and was becoming violent. My son told me I needed help, went to a therapist, started talking (after a couple years) and my life has been hell since. But it does get better (if I'd talk more), or so I'm told :)

Sending good thoughts your way

Ghosty

 

[illusionist]

Interesting ghostybear.....I don't talk much..tended to use coping skills with the affects for the past 30 years and not done too badly....now being flooded and not at the best of times.
Thoughts and hugs to you and every one out there as I can't give myself any.

 

[illusionist]

Sorry, I'm flooding..how are we supposed to talk about things when the flashbacks are coming and we had no knowledge that they even existed?...can we talk of things we never knew happened?....stupid question I know...this is hell.

 

[PTSDbegone]

@illusionist I have been there. The flooding is so overwhelming! it makes you question so many things. Mine started almost 3 years ago (was triggered by a photo), and it has been hell ever since. I often question if flashbacks are true memories even. It's all very confusing, frustrating, and so many other things. I wish I had some advice for you. I do believe things will come up more easily when we are more ready to deal with them. Crazy as it sounds it seems to be the case for me as that's how the past few years have been going. More and more keeps coming up, but it's done in a way I can somehow get through it in one piece. Not sure if that makes any sense or not.

 

[Born to Run]

things would come to me when I was in a safe place to deal with them.

Sorry, but I may not understand exactly what you mean? What 'things' do you mean? The safe place is a requirement to heal, but sitting safely in a chair will not heal you, but I assume this is not what you mean.

 

[Born to Run]

can we talk of things we never knew happened?....stupid question I know...this is hell.

Not stupid at all. Yes, we can eventually. I am doing it right now in therapy. My body remembered all the really bad stuff I had no idea that happened to me. Emotions come with it, and one can talk about it, and more importantly let go of it.

Hugs to you :hug:

 

[illusionist]

Sorry born to run....meant when we are settled in life..when our minds could handle it.

 

[shimmerz]

Idk about you, but there would never be a safe place to handle the shit that has come up with me. Nowhere. Never. There is no safety in this.

It think it is more like:
If you get to a stage where you are too damned tired to keep chasing your thoughts away by creating chaos in your life, working yourself to death, running as fast as you can in ANY way you can from your thoughts..... I think THAT is what they mean by reaching a SAFE place/time. Pffft!

 

[Born to Run]

Oh, yes now I get it, sorry. Could it not be that the safe steady state you were in for 30 years made you strong enough to start to feel the current hell? Even though you may not know what it is exactly about, you do feel the pain, and that seems like a starting point. If your mind could not deal with it you would not be where you are know in this hell :( It is our dysregulated nervous f*ck system that causes the flooding, as it has all been too overwhelming in the past. I believe to expect that the 'things' will present themselves in a clear cut way to you now, even coming from a safe place, is not realistic. It still means your system shows signs that it is ready to deal with things now, although they present themselves in a messy way.

 

[shimmerz]

how are we supposed to talk about things when the flashbacks are coming and we had no knowledge that they even existed?

This is when being able to read the body comes in VERY handy. Many times body memories came first and t-doc used to read them like a large print book.