For those who recovered, how long did it take and are there 3 or 4 lessons you can share with us?

[LanaD]

I'm wondering when this will end because I don't know how much longer I can take it. I can't think. It's like I've developed not only a mental disorder but mental retardation as well and it's just...well, you all probably know. I want to be myself again.

So I was reading a post from a decade ago about sour amazing founder's recovery (PTSD Timeline To Recovery) and started wondering about others' path to recovery.

Thank you for your replies and thank you, Anthony, for this site!

 

[Wendell_R]

I had years in the wilderness doing some misguided psychoanalytical work. I was diagnosed correctly four years ago. Treatment was complicated because I was dealing with both addictive behavior and PTSD. I tried somatic therapy along with CBT for the addictions. Some of that was useful, and is still useful, but it wasn't the key and inside I was still a wreck of internal conflict. About two years ago I learned about trauma-associated dissociation, and decades of my life started to make sense. The dissociation was hard to diagnose because on the standard dissociative scale I score really low. I've been doing intensive work the past two years, and making good progress. I did a year or so of trauma work with my parts, and now we are doing EMDR. Two years ago was also when I got sober. For me, that point two years ago was a huge turning point. The therapy is still a lot of work, and I've got lots left to do, but the "I don't know how much longer I can take it" phase was over and life was clearly worth living. So ... two years from diagnosis to the turning point for a PTSD case with hidden dissociation.

That's just my experience! I can imagine the timeline is just incredibly variable.

 

[Empty Shell]

I'm under the impression I probably won't get "over it". Not trying to be negative, I just am! I'm the most negative person I've ever known. I didn't set out to be this way, but when something goes on for 58 years, and you stuff it, keep the secrets, whatever else - too exhausted. I'm thinking if trauma it taken care of asap, there is much more hope, I mean, it makes sense.

Your mention of 'mental retardation' scared me. And you've been working on this for two years? I'm wondering what the hell is going on because I can hardly talk to people anymore. My ONE friend I have left is always asking questions about what I'm saying. I leave out very important, typical information that should be included, and start in the middle of a thought. As though I've already talked about the important stuff like, TOPIC? No, not me, I start in the middle and jump all over and she's frustrated and trying to be patient.

I'm try to get through each day, trying my best to get something done - trying. I forget like crazy, too. I keep forgetting what I'm trying to write here. So, what the heck, Happy Birthday to you all this year.

I had years in the wilderness doing some misguided psychoanalytical work. I was diagnosed correctly four years ago. Treatment was complicated because I was dealing with both addictive behavior and PTSD. I tried somatic therapy along with CBT for the addictions. Some of that was useful, and is still useful, but it wasn't the key and inside I was still a wreck of internal conflict. About two years ago I learned about trauma-associated dissociation, and decades of my life started to make sense. The dissociation was hard to diagnose because on the standard dissociative scale I score really low. I've been doing intensive work the past two years, and making good progress. I did a year or so of trauma work with my parts, and now we are doing EMDR. Two years ago was also when I got sober. For me, that point two years ago was a huge turning point. The therapy is still a lot of work, and I've got lots left to do, but the "I don't know how much longer I can take it" phase was over and life was clearly worth living. So ... two years from diagnosis to the turning point for a PTSD case with hidden dissociation.

That's just my experience! I can imagine the timeline is just incredibly variable.

It's so overwhelming trying to understand all this! And I wish there was help. I need help. I'm so tired of crying every single day. My son is the "why" behind my continued existence.

 

[somerandomguy]

sour amazing founder

Hahaha. ?

I think three years is a pretty optimistic timeline for many of us. However, I believe some of us, working on it every day, might be out of the woods in less than three years. I think our traumas and treatments are so individualistic, it's very difficult to plan out any kind of timeline.

PTSD also keeps its own time in that lots of us think we're basically over it, and then it comes back around.

I do think that it requires work to get better. If you're not working on it - and I recognize the work itself and the way "work" is defined are also very individualistic - you're simply not going to get any better.

 

[Whirlwind]

I don't know how much longer I can take it. I can't think.

It sucks, I know :-(

I don't know where you are "at" but here is the short and sweet version...

• I had to stop avoiding and stare my trauma in the eye (with professional help)
• It got worse before it got better. But these awful times had a silver lining....they produced searingly important epiphanies which I value to this day
• I needed to steer my therapy, change therapists 3x and expand my resources until I found the right fit and answers (an unexpected read for me was "The Trauma Toolkit" by Sue Pease Bannitt)
• Then I faced my current nightmare of a trauma and take a leap into the unknown saddled by my terror and uncertainty

It took me 10 years. But it would have been much shorter but I was in a bad environment that was not conducive to my healing. Without being re-traumatized I think it would have taken me 3 yrs.

I am happy again.

You are still in there.

Whirlwind

 

[grit]

Start as you would with a baby and trying to ensure good health and the future:

Do you eat well? If not, try to learn how.

Do you sleep well? If not, try to learn how by eating well and going to bed on time.

Do you exercise (food for the bones/muscles)? If not, start with at least a brisk walk daily to the grocery or to work or taking steps (if you can).

Do you write? If not, have a dairy where you can share your feelings and become accustomed to who you are (the negative side). A lot of time trauma is either identifying with the negative side and resisting it or becoming the negative side and not knowing it, or loving the negative side and refusing to see the positive side. Both of these are what our parents or early care givers gave us in our body to some extent. By writing and being a bit creative (or drawing) you will start to accept both sides rather than fighting inside. It is a start. Splitting the body and the mind is the base of insanity, trauma and many other mental health issues. Creatively most likely makes this two sides meet and mingle. You may not become much different but some rough edges may calm down.

Therapy – to learn how to be in relation with another and speak your mind. This is a training not to fall in love or stay in this forever thinking this is realistic. This is to learn how to talk and act in relationship from inside out. This relationship will deal with your internalizations. How do you see you and others in your head? Not how do you act appropriately at work or socially. It is how do you see the world behind the eyes? And that is aligned with the front of the eyes or as close as possible? You need to have that goal in order to achieve it. If you to go therapy to have grievances of what happened in the past forever, you will be having grievances forever. What to do the residue of the past is the work of good therapy.

If you can manage that, you are already half way through.

If you are OK with most of those, then the next step can be:

Working

Having outside relationships and learning how to be in it (from the therapy relationship).

Taking care of others in more practical way (without engulfing or avoiding)

If you have little bit of all the above, you are better than millions of people in the world and then maybe, just maybe, you are too ambitious and need to learn how to mediate and be grateful of what you have and appreciate. Volunteering, giving back and being gentle on the soul is in order.

This list is cycle not linear. You can start the bottom and work your way up or in the middle.

Basically, find what is working and spend more time on it. If not, you are splitting and focusing on the negative above all else.

Of course all that being said, without health (biological or environmental), one cannot really focus on other things that much …so that is that too. It is hard out there, be kind to yourself.

 

[Rani G2]

think our traumas and treatments are so individualistic, it's very difficult to plan out any kind of timeline.

Yes... couldn’t agree more!

 

[Wendell_R]

I needed to steer my therapy, change therapists 3x and expand my resources until I found the right fit and answers (an unexpected read for me was "The Trauma Toolkit" by Sue Pease Bannitt)

I really agree with this. If I had been brave enough to say "this isn't working" earlier, I would have saved many years! When I became actively involved in figuring out what worked best for me, my therapy worked better. There are a lot of different approaches, and what works for some doesn't work for others.

 

[EveHarrington]

*never give up, never stop pushing forward, never lose hope

*one therapist and one type of therapy isn’t going to get you to the finish line. Healing comes from multiple modalities. There are many pieces to the puzzle. It’s important to do whole body and mind healing.

*you won’t learn everything from your therapist and/or psychiatrist. It’s imperative that you do your own research and read as much as you can

 

[Wendell_R]

*never give up, never stop pushing forward, never lose hope

*one therapist and one type of therapy isn’t going to get you to the finish line. Healing comes from multiple modalities. There are many pieces to the puzzle. It’s important to do whole body and mind healing.

*you won’t learn everything from your therapist and/or psychiatrist. It’s imperative that you do your own research and read as much as you can

I should print this out, laminate it, and put it in my wallet. (Yeah, I know I'm old school.)

 

[LanaD]

OUR amazing founder! Not sour! OMG!!! That's a typo, I'm sorry! :D

Hahaha. ?

Thanks, @Whirlwind ! I was doing fine for a while then had incidents that messed things up again. What I've been doing is actually facing my situation and trying to use the crap to make me more resilient.

My legal case is still not closed and I'll have to go back to where things happened for another court date so that's thrown me back into crapville again. My new therapist sucks, too. All in all I'm trying to make lemonade out of the lemons being thrown at me but it helps to know others have "made it".

Hi @Wendell_R,

It's really hard for me because I used to be really sharp, and the kind of work I did required the kind of sharpness I possessed, so when I can barely put two sentences together it hits me really hard.

What DOES seem to help a bit is meditation, but the catch 22 is that some days my mind is so off and I'm so exhausted that I just don't have the ability to even think about meditation. What about you, do you work and do you meditate?

 

[Rani G2]

@LanaD Hi

How long Did it take?

My mother experienced daily violence while she was pregnant with me, so the abuse went on for a couple of years...where I experienced some bad events/sexual abuse and so on. Lived in boarding schools, different countries ect.
Chronic traumatization meant that I needed a „Bottom-up“ Approach.

From psychosomatic clinic/To the Psychiatric ward
I am on and off in T since 2007 (As I was suicidal).

Years of Body Therapy
I was on medication in the very beginning. I stopped going out of the house due to OCD, I had to control the house for 3-4 hours. Didn’t wash myself (This was around 2005), didn’t brush my teeth..regularly. My hair needed to be cut off short then because it needed to be detangled.No work, no school, from 2005-2006 I guess.

Now, I am married, on work since 2012 and I haven’t been sick (Except for a bad cold)For a long time.

What really helped me was Part therapy for complex Trauma and Yoga and reading/reading/reading everything I could get on developmental Trauma/C-Ptsd.