Forgetful therapist

[Justmehere]

Try looking at it this way: it’s kind to others to let people know when there is a problem that affects the relationship and needs to be solved.

It can be unkind to stuff it when doing so just builds up resentment and/or distrust. It can be unkind to hope they will be able to guess at the problem.

Kindness and anger are not always opposed. Therapy is a good place to work through it.

Help yoir therpaist do their job better by letting him know what’s up for you. It doesn’t have to be confrontational or even about anger, but simply a heads up as to what will help you more.

When I have dropped the ball on the job, and overlooked that I was doing so, it’s helped me when someone that I’m working for has given me a heads up and talked with me about solutions. I appreciate those folks more, not less.

 

[Deleted member 541]

I don’t see where this is even a problem. How many clients does a therapist see in an average day? I can see where a bit of confusion might occur. I’d just remind him gentlyand move on...

I would be more pissed is he kept referring to me as Susan, when my name is Wendy. Or if he kept saying how awful it must have been to be the victim of a purse snatching, when I was raped!!!!

 

[UnicornSightings]

It's not very easy for me to bring myself to talk about it. I feel like i have two very different minds ope...

In my own experience I find that the anger part stays way longer than the embarrassment and shame. And your t’s reaction will help with those feelings.

 

[Deleted member 38906]

Update:i didn't even have to try to bring up my two opposing parts in therapy today... It just sort of came up on its own naturally.

My T was like I don't know much about the part of you that benefits from coming here... I mostly here about the attacking part who is trying to protect you.. But what about the other part?

Which led into a conversation about if I give voice to the part that likes therapy, the angry part will torment me bc she doesn't trust you bc you sometimes make mistakes about facts.

His responded that I try my best to do a good job in our sessions. And even though I sometimes mix facts, I have a clear understanding of the extent of protection you have had to put in place for yourself for protection against people so maybe the angry part can relax a bit in here knowing that bc I would never intentionally try to hurt you emotionally. If anything, I would want to protect you.

And then we talked about memories, dreams and attunement. Something else he said really stood out for me....apparently if no one tunes into you and your feelings as a kid, you don't develop feelings..like you can become emotionally blind to feelings.

Anyways, all in all it was a very good session :)

 

[EveHarrington]

Not wanting important details forgotten isn’t the same as wanting perfection.

I hope you talk to...

You missed the response where the OP said point blank that her therapist shouldn’t make mistakes at his job. This IS expecting perfection based on the definition of perfection itself, that being no mistakes!