Getting Back Into Society??

[HangInThere]

See happiness is a mind set not a place we go. So therefore its so hard for us because our mindset is all screwed up with other emotions.

My therapist told me that my mind has to many old dirt roads I keep traveling down and that I need to get on the highway.. LOL.. How true is that?

Hang

 

[Red Feather]

One solution I am thinking of, is just being strict to myself and refuse to speak about my problems with my friends. I can maybe value their friendship enough to think about them more and just reserve my own problems for other people who would surely understand. I guess it is some kind of etiquette.

Of course that might end up being fake, but if people really cared about how I am and feeling then there is more space to talk. Those are the best types of friends. But if not, then I can either distance myself or behave accordingly. I think people with PTSD usually have a good judgment in this regards, because they are normally more sensitive and empathic.

 

[HangInThere]

Started the diary thing kinda in the middle but I started it...WOW seeing on paper is painful and there is so much more before and now ...My whole life has been trauma...

Hang

 

[dbacs]

Hangin there, is that your boat in your avatar?

Much of my family have boats. I haven't been able to go out with them for a while now, because of my health. Looking forward to the day i can do that again.

I think most of the avoidance from family/friends to talk about our ptsd, or other problems, in my opinion is the super huge need for instant gratification most people have.

It seems like humans are addicted to instant gratification. If they ask about our problems then they assume we will get upset, which will make them upset. If they are one of the people searching for instant gratification then they will avoid any roadblocks to get it.

Sometimes it even seems like they think they can catch depression like a virus, or even that talking about it will just reinforce the problems.

Anyone else feel that way?

 

[HangInThere]

Yes that is my boat THX.. And yes I feel that way all the time...Number one thing not to do in a conversation. Use I my me. Well how do us with PTSD stop that? lol

 

[KP the nut]

My T says to ease into it. I ask him how to ease into it but he offers no advice. Weird.

I struggled with this one, but my T was supportive and helped. He would set me weekly challenges. Not huge unmanagable ones, but things I could achieve.

One of my other issues was driving, so he would have me do 3 small drives.

Socially, he would challenge me to phone and talk to a firend, then have a friend around for coffee. I built up slowly. I went for a night out, I had lemon oil with me in case I felt panicky, I took regular breaks to go outside and breath.

I refused to give in. I am still pushing myself. I organised and met with forum members. We are meeting again in a couple of weeks. On Tuesday, if I don't wimp out I am going to join the Womens Institute.

Remember small steps.

The reason I have a hard time is because once people ask me how I'm doing

I usually say something like, 'I have good days and bad days, today isn't great but I use techniques to help me through'. Often they will ask what and I will tell them.

They don't really matter though, you are the improtant one. Do what is best for you.

KP.

 

[AzureMind]

Hey KP! Goin' through the same motions out into the 'real world' as everyone else! I guess I just look at it like it's a big nuthouse, and I try to rest easy knowing that everyone's got their fair share of crap their dealing with too. It's tough, but I'm determined to pull through. I need my funds to get a place of my own, nothing to major at first, but good enough to live in the peace and quiet I need. As long as you got a relatively stable check/income coming in, a place to rest your head (even if it's not the best) and you're dealing with your symptoms the right way, that'll do for now; once you've got the hang of balancing things out more, you can add more things into your life, but right now, baby steps...gotta go easy on yourself till your sure you can get by ok.

For me, I'm probably gonna have to serve/bus tables for a while, and I'm COMPLETELY introverted, BUT, it's a way to pay the bills, and it's a test to see if I can hang in there and manage...it's a small joint, but it's money, and a way for me to build myself up. I'm trying to stay positive, and in spite of everything, I suppose it could be worse...

What scares me though is I feel like I'm stepping out into the world alone; if it was just me spreading my wings like every 20 something does, that'd be different, but the PTSD/Depression/Dissociation I'm a little nervous if I'll be able to stay focused enough to do it, but as long as I just keep smiling, and stay strong within myself (never letting myself give up, or run from a challenge which isn't in my dictionary anyway :) ), and reach out to the people who love me, I think I can manage; I'm just happy that my life is under MY direct control now, and that's all I need; everything else will be there...;)

Keep trying, it gets easier when you start realizing the progress you make!