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Goodbye to forum

  • Post starter Post starter Deleted member 41702
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Hey Dexter,
I feel for ya . Actually feeling a few of those same thoughts right now... and have felt al...
I have grown sick and tired of trying and trying to get better without success from myself or anyone else. My life serves no purpose to anyone. It has no meaning. It has no value to me. We all die someday. I have stopped caring about what happens to me.
 
It seems very important for you to hold on to the believe that no one cares.... this is called 'right fighting', and serves no purpose... some people get lost here in all the threads and posts and never receive a reply at all, they just post again....
We are not trying to change your mind.... the proof you are being paid attention to and given suggestions is here, in our posts to you.... it's not about how many replies we get, it's what we DO with the replies we do get... wishing you well.... I'm out.
 
I'm curious @Dexter Engvik as to what support here would look like to you? What is it you feel is lacking for you here? I hear you saying you're not getting enough responses, but the facts looking at your post history show differently - your threads and profile posts aren't really getting less attention than anyone else's.

I spent some time the other day replying to you and offering some suggestions of how you might get more from this forum, and you chose not to acknowledge or respond to any of it. That's your choice, but as a general rule, that's something that's going to put most people off taking the time to respond to future posts from you.

It seems to me that this is less about the number of responses you receive and more about the type of responses you want. So, I'll ask again, what would support look like to you?
 
I'm a bit late to this thread but my guess is that your anger is misplaced, which is totally understandable, and it's something we all experience. I don't think you're really angry at this forum at all. You should try to pinpoint what it is you're really upset about -- it's pretty obvious it's not really about a lack of responses here. And if you really intended to leave the forum, you wouldn't have responded to the people who commented on this thread.

Are you angry at someone else in your life for ignoring you? What is really going on? I say that not to attack you or anything, not at all, but as someone who has done exactly what you're doing and understands the frustration all too well.
 
Last time I checked, I am not "no one". Hope you can deal with your depressive aspect and in time heal Dex.

Soooooo much self defeating thinking and a quagmire there: "I am destined to suffer, that much is clear. I will never understand people. Hell I don't think I even WANT to understand them. I have no interest in others. Not even in myself. All I want is a paycheck so that I can buy the stuff I need in order to make a quick exit. My life has no value to me or anyone else. With me gone the world will stay the same. I will face an eternity of sleep. At least I won't be feeling any pain. Everytime I reach out and try to get help, I try to tell myself that it's gonna work. And everytime, I am let down. I can only count on myself. The human race is my enemy. Seeking help is a giant waste of time."

I really would pause to consider that getting a paycheck and even exiting requires some rudimentary people/socialization/communication skills. And exiting Norway to somewhere else, you still will be taking you with you.
 
@digger beat me to it. What would support look like to you. How many replies would be enough. It is extremely frustrating when you feel like you can't get help. I get that. You have to understand though we are all suffering too! The thing is, you have to be persistent. There is no quick fix for PTSD. It sucks, but there isn't. We want to help you and if we could make your suffering disappear in less than a moment we would. We can't though. All we can do is show that we really do care and listen. Many people won't respond to a post because they don't know what to say, but will like it to show support.

Tell us what you need from us.
 
This is already more replies than ive gotten on anything ive wrote;)

I think a lot of people get your actual point that you describe but, that wasnt your initial posting.

I bet if you wrote a post about feeling like you have a life with no meaning, no value, no value to you... you'd get a lot of takers. Frankly, I feel the same way... Id love to hear how others have found value in their lives. Its not that easy for people who are depressed and there are a lot of depressed people on here.

Id peobably reply that one of the only things that made my life feel valuable was volunteering... and having a dog! Now I don't volunteer but, I did just get a dog:)
 
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@Dexter Engvik I does not matter what the reason is, the fact is your hear and that is what matters, keep in mind most everybody here is suffering in one way or another, so not all of us are able to respond to some forms of posts. I know when I have been most needy is when I am trending towards being suicidal, that's hard for many on the forum to deal with as many struggle with the same thing, so responses drop off. I had one person on the forum who told me she could not deal with my S/I and hopelessness. Not everyone will do that, in fact very few, There are always one or two who are there for me, and and I just try to be open and honest about how I feel. This forum has been a literal lifeline for me, it still is, as it got me through rough times where I would have given up or worse.

A few posts is a good thing, its not about the quantity its about quality, would you rather get a lot of posts of people saying "were there for you" or "we hear you" acknowledging your presence, or would you rather have a few posts where the responders engage you on how you feel, your struggle, your needs, ideas, suggestions, their experiences, etc.

I urge you to stick around, and invest in the posts you do get.

If you feel your not getting what you need, post it, the only way people can respond is if you post what your feeling or need. I applaud you for speaking up about your feeling isolated on the board, I feel that way too sometimes. I feel that way everywhere sometimes. I suspect you can relate to that.
 
@Dexter Engvik, it looks like you just joined last month. It takes a while to get going on this site, at least in my opinion, and once you start a topic for discussion, sometimes it takes a few days for people to respond. Heck, there are threads from last year or longer that get revived because they become relevant again.

And, you are not posting on a board full of therapists/counselors/ mental health professionals all waiting to help you.
This is a support site full of people, who like you, are all looking for help in some way shape or form.

If someone, no one, or not enough people respond to your postings, it's not about you. It's about all of us and where we happen to be in our lives, our recovery and even if we happen to be checking the site that day or that week.

It sounds like you are really hurting. There are some really amazing people on this site who have given me some incredible advice, constructive criticism and ideas.

Maybe you should give it more time. And there is an FAQ section in the forum area that tells you how to maximize your responses. Maybe you can read that and it can help you if you feel like you aren't getting what you need.

In any case, I wish you the best.
 
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