sonicwhite
Platinum Member
Ok, so I took some time off to pray and reflect to God about my situation. I know there are roads now you just don't go down. Meaning opening up ways to talk to ppl who hate you. Ok, we will leave it at that. Now on to God. His impressions are becoming so pushing on my heart I can't resist what He desires me to do.
I don't care if you're Muslim, Catholic Hindu. Christ is the Son(SUN) of God. The bright reflection of the Father. Often times I look up in the sky and I loon directly at the sun and I imagine that's Christ. And that's all His Glory.
I got offended because I was told I was stalking. No! I repeat! No. I have never stalked anyone. If anything I've my a wedge between two ppl the the bridge is no longer there and there is nothing in the cosmos that can fix it. I've trie the Lord. He says just forgive and carry your cross. So I do.
If anything I have to block certain ppl because there pictures will not stop showing up on my fb. I don't know if it's a Facebook social media thing but I don't want to see my ex in the "you may know this person" list. Yes she is a different person than what she was. But nothing that I have to accept can change the brutal history we had together.
I have practically been alone for eleven years. That's a long time since 20 to 31. But the wisdom I gained because I endured patiently and never denied Christs name for sex of human needs. Paul warns us of a lukewarm relationship. That it is easier to worry about thine self then it is someone who doesn't believe that Christ is the Messiah.
Sorry for rambling, I'm trying to find the right dual diagnoses center rehab I can go to to beat the beast of addiction. In all my fight I cannot do it alone. I know I need help. I know I will become a great influence in the community and I will show ppl the Cross. The same Cross that saved me from meth, and death. So while as of this moment I have a great cloud of witnesses seeing me. I want to make it clear. I'm trying to get help. Hypocrisy hangs over my head but hell I admit it.
There are a lot of this in my life right now that are influence me and I'm about to pop and burst with living water. I just don't know what is keeping me from popping. The drug abuse absulatly needs to stop. As for ministry I never want to be a false teacher and steer ppl in the wrong direction.
So please know I have the honest most well intentions for all who read this. That one day they will say he wrote that and now I believe because He walked it like he talked it. I don't desire money or fame. But I do need to get the Wors of God out of me because this world is dying. I'm heartbroken by all of this. I cannot stand around while riots and cop shootings happen and keep my voice closed. NO! I will proclaim to every living creature about Christ.
Ok my greeting is over. Hope y'all can stomach that. I love all of you and I'm back. Just know when you call me a stalker or creep you are blaspheming me. Not the Holy Spirit but me sonicwhite. Because I get so offended when ppl say that that I almost just close the door and never open it up again. I know ppl whhere well meaning and chastening me. But I'm no stalker. If anything I'm being stalked. So please no I have a VERY VERY tender heart. And I can get hurt so easily really when you don't understand the facts because I keep it a secret because I care about the person that hates me.
So her secrets don't get out. NOW! I've made myself clear. Have a great night.
I don't care if you're Muslim, Catholic Hindu. Christ is the Son(SUN) of God. The bright reflection of the Father. Often times I look up in the sky and I loon directly at the sun and I imagine that's Christ. And that's all His Glory.
I got offended because I was told I was stalking. No! I repeat! No. I have never stalked anyone. If anything I've my a wedge between two ppl the the bridge is no longer there and there is nothing in the cosmos that can fix it. I've trie the Lord. He says just forgive and carry your cross. So I do.
If anything I have to block certain ppl because there pictures will not stop showing up on my fb. I don't know if it's a Facebook social media thing but I don't want to see my ex in the "you may know this person" list. Yes she is a different person than what she was. But nothing that I have to accept can change the brutal history we had together.
I have practically been alone for eleven years. That's a long time since 20 to 31. But the wisdom I gained because I endured patiently and never denied Christs name for sex of human needs. Paul warns us of a lukewarm relationship. That it is easier to worry about thine self then it is someone who doesn't believe that Christ is the Messiah.
Sorry for rambling, I'm trying to find the right dual diagnoses center rehab I can go to to beat the beast of addiction. In all my fight I cannot do it alone. I know I need help. I know I will become a great influence in the community and I will show ppl the Cross. The same Cross that saved me from meth, and death. So while as of this moment I have a great cloud of witnesses seeing me. I want to make it clear. I'm trying to get help. Hypocrisy hangs over my head but hell I admit it.
There are a lot of this in my life right now that are influence me and I'm about to pop and burst with living water. I just don't know what is keeping me from popping. The drug abuse absulatly needs to stop. As for ministry I never want to be a false teacher and steer ppl in the wrong direction.
So please know I have the honest most well intentions for all who read this. That one day they will say he wrote that and now I believe because He walked it like he talked it. I don't desire money or fame. But I do need to get the Wors of God out of me because this world is dying. I'm heartbroken by all of this. I cannot stand around while riots and cop shootings happen and keep my voice closed. NO! I will proclaim to every living creature about Christ.
Ok my greeting is over. Hope y'all can stomach that. I love all of you and I'm back. Just know when you call me a stalker or creep you are blaspheming me. Not the Holy Spirit but me sonicwhite. Because I get so offended when ppl say that that I almost just close the door and never open it up again. I know ppl whhere well meaning and chastening me. But I'm no stalker. If anything I'm being stalked. So please no I have a VERY VERY tender heart. And I can get hurt so easily really when you don't understand the facts because I keep it a secret because I care about the person that hates me.
So her secrets don't get out. NOW! I've made myself clear. Have a great night.
